Greetings, lovers of fanfiction mockeries! Tonight I decided to start mocking bad fanfiction in English too, and began my quest for appropriate material at the number one spot for it: Fanfiction.net - "unleash your mental diarreah". Since I love the Disgaea series, I hoped for a pleasant surprise of a fanfiction, but sadly it was not meant to be. Instead my eyes were assaulted by a mindnumbingly convoluted Mary Sue fanfiction. But see for yourself.

My commentary is normal, while the written abomination will be in red.

***

[ Pieces of Memories ][Disgaea 3 – Mao x OC ][ 000.5 : Epiloque ]

Great, from the first few words I already know that this is going to suck. Mao/anyone? Not happening. Also, it's interesting to know that the author either starts the story from the end, or just uses fancy words without knowing what they mean.

Spoiler: It's the second one.

Pia-chan again~

This chapter covers a little bit of my main OC’s past =p

If you wish to know more about the OC’s,

As well as follow this story’s updates,

Then go STRAIGHT AWAY TO MY BLOG xD

Translation: I'm too stupid to work the backstory of my characters into the fic itself, could you just do my work for me kthanxbye!

PM me or review to know the address

Review if it’s confusing x3

Oh, I'm sure It will be.

Mikito is retired for now.. Sorry about the mistakes.


"I won't correct them though, that would be too much work."

On to the STORY!

P.S : My side-characters OC will do every chapter’s talk, and I will be there too, as Evriel.

Yes, why not add a segment that is annoying and totally pointless? On second thought, it would fit this fanfic perfectly.

The Netherworld, the world of Demons. It is simply divided, and holds many misteries. One of them maybe lies right in front of you. You never know what will happen every day..

"Ominous but meaningless narration? Check."

-Unknown Lab, Unknown Island-


That really narrows it down.

A demon stared at a tube. That tube, containing a cat-eared demon, seemed fragile, as if it were to break. The demon smiled evilly.

Demons tend to do that. Although I can't imagine why he would do that now. Is it Dr. Hojo, after he reincarnated as one? Or the Disgaea-ounterpart of Dr. Insano? That would be awesome.

“ Finally.. “

The water bubbles as the cat-eared demon opened her eyes. She is alive.

It's alive... it's ALIVE!

At first glance, peoples would think that she is a mere Nekomata. But, she is more like a humanoid demon, except for those ears and tail.


In other words, it is not a demon-cat-monster, but instead a demon-catgirl? Wow. That is awesomely retarded.

“ She is completed.. My ultimate creation!

"Finally I've created the ultimate sextoy - a catgirl with a HORSE WIENER! MUHAHAHAHA!!!!"

With this, I shall rule the Netherworld! Not even the Overlord or God can stop me!

"Unless they have troops. Or weapons. Or are over Level 10. Or..."

Hahahahahaha!! Now, answer me..! “


I'm not sure that would work, with her being in a tube and all.

The demon punched the glass of the tube, and it starts to crack open. The water flowed to the floors. The cat-eared demon stepped out and stared at the demon.

“ Now, let us see.. I am your master. You shall only listen to my or— “

*alarm ringing*

He just created her and is already getting cockblocked.

“ ?! ”

*bang* *bang*

“ We know that you have been performing illegal experiments on Nekomatas!! Come out!! “

Who are those guys, the Netherworld-PETA?

The door opened and a group of demons started to search all over the place. The demon tried to hide, knowing that it is useless to resist. The cat-eared demon, though, just stared in awe.

"Or because they forgot to give her a brain, it's hard to tell."

“ Where is he?! “

Oh shit, Batman is coming!

“ Hey! Over here! “

“ Kill him! Kill him! “

*gun shots*


Can you feel the exciting action? Good, me neither.

“ Shit! He escaped! Leader, give us your orders! “

“ It’s alright. “

“ But!! “

Another demon which seemed to be their leader kneel down at the cat-eared demon.

“ ..? “

“ I see.. So you’re the victim. Come with us. You are now.. Free. “

No, Free is an awesome werewolf and has cool eye powers that make Sasuke Uchiha look like Scrappy Doo.

“ ..Free..? “

"Me no have brain!"

=50 Years Later=

As if it wasn't confusing enough, now we get a tmeskip.

-Leader Demon’s House-

“ Nyahaha!! “

"Why are we even laughing? Hahaha!"

“ Damn you, Rikka!! Give that back! “

“ Here, then~! “

Rikka, the cat-eared demon jumped and threw back a pot of honey at the demon. She laughed and jumped down.

Cats eat honey? Or are we talking about demons now? I'm so confused!

“ Rik..kaaaa…!! “

KHAAAAN! Sorry, bad joke.

“ Give it up, you know you can’t beat me~ “

“ Grrrh!! Why you! “

Rikka ran along the halls and bumped into the demon, the leader of the group that picked her up on that fateful day 50 years ago.

Ah, finally, we get some plot!

“ Rikka, you might hurt yourself if you run like that. “

“ Uhh.. Sorry, Chief. “

Oh... false alarm.

“ Well, now, it’s almost time for dinner. Call Miko and Magisa here.. Do not forget Evriel too, her tuna steak is ready. Oh, and Fransisca too, with her friends. And Hina, Koiki, Nami, Jun-- “


God, wasn't one character without anything defining him not enough? No, we get a shitload!

“ Nah, I’m way too lazy! They’re all over this big house!. “

“ Rikka. “

“ Alright, alright.. “

In Germany, answering that way means "kiss my ass".

Her days lasted peacefully like this. Every day. No one would’ve guessed that it would end really soon..

Oh, now we're getting to the arbitrary tragedy that is completely illogical but kicks off the "wacky adventures".

=1 week later=

“ Grrh!! Damn that Kid! Asking me to go out shopping!

Yes, we feel so sorry for you. Who deserves such a soul-crushing task?! [/sarcasm]

I’ll beat him later! “

Rikka walked at the garden, not noticing the prickle of blood flowing near her. She looked around and stopped.

Wierd, now I'm having Naruto-flashbacks. Does she have an older brother?

“ Why.. Is it too quiet? “

*footsteps*

“ !! Who’s there?! “

HEEEERE'S JHONNY!

“ Ri--rik…ka.. “

“ Hina?! What’s wrong?! “

“ Es..cape.. Everyone.. Dead.. Chief.. Chief is.. “

"Can't... speak... proper... sentences..."

“ Oi!! Hina?! Hina?! Shit!! “

Hina: "No way!"

(That was vulgar, I apologize.)

She ran and ran, looking all over the house. She turned at one corner and stared at the kid’s bedroom, where Magisa, Satsuki, Fransisca and their personal bodyguard Haseo is playing before she left. It’s empty, but there is no stain of blood. Suddenly..

“ Uwaaaaggh!!!! “

Whoa! I almost had a heartattack there! Jump-scares work so well when you WRITE something!

“ Chief!! “

“ !! That’s..! Chief and Nami’s!! “

She jumped through the roofs and busted through the living room. And, at the first glance, she understood almost everything. Chief is dead. Everyone.. It is unknown either if they are escaped or killed.

“ Rikka-nee!! Save—Uwahh!!! “

“ Namii!! “

Okay, now I'm totally lost. Or is this one of those bad acid-trips that you aren't supposed to take seriously? I feel like watching Evangelion, only without the religious bullshit, leaving just regular bullshit.

At that time, seeing the death of her family in front of her eyes, only one thought struck her mind. He.. He’s my creator. But, he killed everyone. Why? Why must this happen?

“ It’s been a long time.. Sample 00.. Now, you shall be killed right here, for giving me through all that trouble.. You didn’t even protect your master.. “

Actually, I take that back. Even vangelion wasn't that confusing.

“ What?! Why are you my master?! “

The door opened and a sleepy Evriel came in. The demon stopped and stared at the Cait Sith.

And now we're doing a crossover with Final Fantasy VII? Why?

He turned to Evriel and drew his sword.

“ Wha..? Rikka-nee, nya? “

“ Good night, Catty-chan. “

“ Nyaaa?? “

What? All this forced Japanese doesn't make it easier to understand.

Suddenly, without even she herself noticed, Rikka’s claws got longer and pierced through the demon. Her cat-ears twitched when the blood of the demon sprayed against her face.

“ N-nee-chan, nyaa? “

“ ..I hate this. Hate..!! “

"Nee-Chan SMASH!"

“ Nee-chan?! “

A magic circle suddenly surrounded Rikka. She seems to be sucked in, because of her own powers. The feline could only watch as her so-called nee-chan went berserk.

“ ..Away. “

I would love to, believe me.

“ Nya..? “

“ I don’t want to stay here!! It sucks! It’s boring!! It’s better to go somewhere else!! “

“ Nyaa?! Nee-chan?! “

Evriel noticed her nee-chan’s title.

“ Nee-chan..? Why is it now.. “

“ … “

“ Why?! “

--END

I think logic just died. As well as good storytelling.

[Chapter Talk]

Evriel / Pia : Gahh!! All that act made me tired!!

Magisa : Oi!! Are we even alive?!

Evriel : Yeah. Haseo is your bodyguard, right? ==a

Magisa : ..Do that even explains?

As if we haven't suffered enough, now we get the equivalent of cats communicating through Internet-retard-speak.

Fransisca : You sure is stealing the main show..

Satsuki : Hahaha. Calm down. So, will we be on next chapter?

Evriel : Yeah.. Depending on how things go.

All : *preparing to beat the naughty catty*

Evriel : Yikes!!

*spank* *boink* *boom* *ouch*

So yeah. Remember kids, drugs are bad!

***

And that was it. I hope I'll never have to take such an acid-trip again. Unless I'll do the second chapter as well, that is. Dammit!

They have ruined Disgaea! Burn them! Disgaea is my favorite SRPG. I think 3 was the best though. Gig and Zetta were playable.

Yeah, I love it. Game-wise, Disgaea 3 is the best. But I just love the characters from the original so much.

You can play Gig from Soul Nomad? I didn't know that.

Yeah, you have to buy Gig and Revya on the PSN store. Gig and Revya have by far some of the coolest attacks.

Being a Disgea fan as well, it makes the story even more painful. It's poorly written stuff and the true mangling of how to put a bloody sentence that drove me to brief Professor Higgins type rant that went like this...

Why can't the people teach their child how to write,
At their age, this kind of stuff should be trite,
If you wrote like they do instead of the way you do,
You would be bashed too

(Hey, I didn't say it was a masterpeice.)

I haven't played Disgaea, though I want to really badly. The point is, that made me die a little bit on the inside. I don't think a good portion of this is spoiler-y or anything but... Merf.

This is the only mock you've submitted here? I can assure you we want MOAR.

I laughed. A lot. You don't try to overdo you're input and that makes me happy. Or that could be all the medicine I'm on right now. I'm not entirely sure.

And here's chapter 2. Does it get any better? Well... take a look for yourself.

***


[ Pieces of Memories ][Disgaea 3 – Mao x OC ][ 001 : Welcome to Nether Institute, Evil Academy! ]

What's with all the brackets?

Pia…chann.. *yawn*

Well, starting from this chapter Rikka will be Silvie..

Great. Your characters have no personalities, no distinct looks, and no impact on the story - how the hell am I ever going to be able to identify them if you keep making the confusion worse and change their names around?

*yawn* So, don’t get confused at the name-callings.. *yawns even wider*

Too late.

Sorry ‘bout that, I’m a bit sleeee..py…

Oh, and read my OC’s profile if you don’t understand the guys below..

No way, I won't do your work for you just because you can't write yourself out of a garbage heap.

=200 years since that incident=

Since what incident? Hello, how about some information here?

-Evil Academy-Hall-

“ What?! Really?! “ (Magisa)

“ No, no, it’s not like that~! “ (Fransisca)

Fransisca: We're not really friends, I'm just sucking his-

“ Hey, hey.. It’s almost time for lunch. “ (Satsuki)

“ Let’s pull off some pranks!! Nyahaha! “ (Evriel)

As pathetic as that sounds... people actually do that at Evil Academy. Wow, we're only two chapters in and there is already something vaguely related to Disgaea 3!

“ Seriously.. Guys.. “ (Haseo)

The five friends chatting happily in the hall of Evil Academy. Magisa, Fransisca, Satsuki, Haseo and the Cait Sith Evriel. They are all the survivors of the incident 200 years ago.

What incident? Did someone with a shitload of metal in his face create a gigantic gravity-shockwave that destroys a eintire city and later sacrificed himself because of some bullshit-speech to revive beloved characters? ...nah, that would be too ridiculous even for this fanfic.

At that day, no one expected, that girl will return. Well, at least, someone will meet her.

..Where?

Why am I here? Who..?

Who am I??

Those are exactly the questions you will ask yourself after reading this shitfest.

..I can’t remember anything at all..

White hair, nerdy glasses, glaring red eyes.

Alucard after a fashion-makeover by Mr. 2?

It’s him. Mao, the honor student of Evil Academy. He noticed the fainted girl by the school’s gate. He approached her, and knelt down. His butler Geoffrey, as usual, always beside him.

“ Hey, who’s this? I don’t remember seeing her before. “

“ I think it might be one of the transfer students.. Hmhmhm.. “

“ !! *drool* Hey! What is.. Her stats! *huff* *huff* “

Yes, ladies: Instead of gawking at your cleavage, Mao checks your stats out.

“ Oh, shall I bring her along, Young Master? “

“ How nice..! Lock her in my lab! “

I know what you're thinking. But he isn't the kind of person to molest girls. He prefers to dissect them.

Geoffrey and Mao hurried over to Mao’s lab. They didn’t notice that someone was watching. That someone is going to start a SUPER BIG TROUBLE soon.

There are some kinds of words that should never be uttered together. "Super big trouble" is one of them, next to "molotov kitten" and "sane fundamentalist".

“ I just saw something..! Really..! Craaa~zy!! “ (Magisa)

20 Nether-minutes after

-Evil Academy-Hall-

“ Eru-shi!! Si-san!! Mama!! Paseo!! Hear this out!! “ (Magisa)

“ What is it, Magi-magi? “ (Fransisca)

“ What’s with all that racket? “ (Haseo)

“ You won’t believe this! That Mao had just kidnapped a GIRL!! A GIRL!! I say! “ (Magisa)

Outragous! Next you're going to tell me that humans tend to breathe and that Bill O'Reilly is one of the biggest douchebags on the planet!

“ Seriously, nyaa?! “ (Evriel)

“ My, how daring, fufufu.. “ (Satsuki)

Hey, you know that japanese laughing-sound? No one actually says that.

Magisa, or Magi-magi, was one of the prankster in the academy, and more like a paparazzi.

Why, is she responsible for Laharl's blackmail-pictures?

With her partner Evriel, or Eru-shi, they usually made honor students the academy’s laughing stock. Fransisca (or Si-san), Satsuki (or Mama/Mami), and Haseo (Paseo) are mostly the planner of their pranks.

“ So, ne, ne.. What are we going to do? “ (Magisa)

Something stupid, I'm sure of it.

“ Of course.. “ (Haseo)

“ We will.. “ (Satsuki)

“ Take photos and SPREAD IT OUT~! “ (Fransisca)

“ Nyaahaha~ xDD “ (Evriel)

What Mao did was evil, and demons ARE evil, you morons! That is not embarassing, he will probably get a medal for kidnapping this girl. No one gives a crap about her anyway, not on this school.

Evriel was the quickest at running away. The feline would usually be the one to spread out photos or do quicky thingy at the ‘Animal Tree’ party’s pranks.

“ Alright! Si-san, Mama, get working on the plans! Paseo, you check out the coordinates with Eru-shi! This’d better be fun! Hahaha!! “ (Magisa)

“ Gotcha~!! “

=Meanwhile..=

“ Just what the hell is this specimen? “

Marysueus Toostupidtoliveicus. There you go.

Mao, looking at the unconscious girl in front of him, just walked around.

“ Hmph. Interesting.. I shall make her my servant and she what she could do! Then, if she really had—Who’s there?! “

The windows suddenly busted open. From the curtains, the ‘Animal Tree’ party then enters! Mao just stood still, though.

That is the stupidest name for a group since Matsuda decided to name the Kira investigation "The Justice Rangers".

“ Doing pranks everyday.. “ (Fransisca)

“ Causing chaos in the academy! “ (Haseo)

I am the shadow that flaps through the night! I am the dictionary that points out your spelling mistakes! I AM - oh wait, wrong show.

“ With that, we are called..!! “ (Satsuki)

“ The ‘Animal Tree’ party!! “ (Magisa)

“ Desu-nya. “ (Evriel)

Translation: Meowth, that's right!

=5 Silent-seconds later..=

“ Just. What. In. The. WORLD?! “ (Mao)

My thoughts exactly. Even for a game with magical demon-lolis, that is too insane.

“ You don’t know us, nya? We stole your research before. “ (Evriel)

“ Ahh! Don’t tell me you’re!! “ (Mao)

“ Oh, so you do remember. “ (Satsuki)

“ Of course!! You’re that crazy party, stealing and doing pranks here and there, Win the Grizzly, Franken-Fire, Brutal Mama, Bloody Paseo, and The Crazy Cat!! Return my skirt-lifting research! “ (Mao)

His what please?! Did Mao suddenly transform into the mad scientist-version of Sanji while I wasn't looking?

“ We’re not called that!! “ (Everyone except Mao)

“ Shut up!! Now what do you guys want?! “ (Mao)

Piss off the reader, I suppose.

“ Nice question. We’re just going to take a photo of you kidnapping—“ (Magisa)

“ Aaah!! That’s—“ (Fransisca)

“ But, why?! “ (Satsuki)

“ No buts! OUTTA here, NOW!! “ (Mao)

The party is kicked out by Mao’s power. Mao, didn’t know, that the girl in front of him now, is going to change his fate very soon!

=30 Annoyed-minutes later=

Annoyed, huh? You're telling me...

-Evil Academy, Math Classroom-

“ Raspberries!! Are you here?! “ (Satsuki)

It's Raspberyl. You moron.

“ Hey, pinky-demon! Answer, nyaa! “ (Evriel)

“ Raspy-kid!! “ (Magisa)

The little demon with pink wings and tail at the front row of the class, turned and answered them, looking annoyed. Her two sidekicks then stood up beside her.

“ What?! Don’t tell me you’re going to class?! “ (Beryl)

“ Heck no. It’s about Mao. “ (Haseo)

“ What is it? “ (Beryl)

“ Well, nyaa.. He kidnapped a girl. “ (Evriel)

“ Then..? “ (Beryl)

“ Well, aren’t you curious, as his childhood friend? “ (Magisa)

Uhh... you're trying to make her jealous? It's not like Mao and her have THAT kind of relationship.

“ Hmm.. I can’t say no to that. Well, I guess I’ll check it out. “

---END

[Chapter Talk]

Magisa : Hahahaha!! We tricked that stupid delinguent! Now, she will.. Uhh..

Evriel : Will what, nya?

Magisa : What, indeed?

Satsuki : Never mind that. Why is Rikka here?

Yes, because you don't know yourself what this pointless waste of time is supposed to accomplish.

Haseo : No idea..

Fransisca : Hey, Magi-magi. I want to kill that Mao. He called me Franken-Fire.

Why not Franken-Fran?

Magisa : He called me Win The Grizzly! Hey wait. Since when did he know my real name?!

Wierd. I thought your real name would be something alog the lines of "Bitchy McDumbass" or "Mary Selfinsertion".

[color=red]Evriel : By the way, for the next chapter, it seems that we won’t appear for some paragraphs.

Magisa : Urgh! Why?! =w=

Evriel : Well, I better get to the story first xD

What story?

Magisa : Then? When will Rikka be called Silvie?

Evriel : Now that you said it..

All : …

This is not humor. This is the castration of humor.

***

Well, damn. That was horrible. And you know the worst part? There is at least one more chapter left to go! ARRRGH!

ARGH! This pisses me off to no tomorrow. The author (Who I'm guessing is female) is too lazy to show who's talking normally, so she puts in parentheses to piss me off even more. (Badass Overlord)

Is it just me or are almost all the characters besides Mao and Geffory OC's? (Badass Overlord)

Yes she is and no, it is not just you. I'm still puzzled why this is called a Disgaea 3 - fanfiction. If you want to make a story about a existing series, then you have to follow it's rules and actually have talent. Like with "The Last Days Of Foxhound". I love it, even though I sadly never played the Metal Gear Solid series myself. Go read that guys, it's phenomenal, unlike this crap.

Here's the last part so far! Enjoy!

***


[ Pieces of Memories ][Disgaea 3 – Mao x OC ][ 002 : The Netherworld Honor Student(s) ]

Pia-chan, again ^^

This chapter will cover the first meeting of Rikka/Silvie and Raspberyl~

Don’t mess up between Rikka-Silviana-Silvie since it’s the same person!

Now they're the same person? This is like a horror-movie-twist, only more retarded.

Other than that, maybe another flashback..

Hmm.. I’m quite busy at the moment so the update will take a long time xD

I'm glad to hear that you won't torture humanity with your badfics for a while.

ONWARD!!

-Evil Academy, School Hall-

Again, at the Netherworld. Mao and his loyal (?) servant Silvie walked around the school, attracting many attention.

“ Hey, look! “ (Demon 1)

“ What the—Who’s that? “ (Teacher 1)

“ Did Mao reconstructed that girl?! Her ears, her tails! Argh, he’s a PERVERT! “ (Demon 2)

No, he's - okay, he is a bit of a pervert. After all, he seemed to be aroused by the fact that Geoffrey experimented with his unconsious body and demanded a video.

Mao stared as if he was going to strike at them, leaving the demons shivering. Silvie made a giggle. Mao looked at the school’s clock and sighed.

“ Hmm.. It’s about time to go. “ (Mao)

“ Um? Where? “ (??)

“ Of course, to go find the legendary hero—Silviana. No, I think just Silvie is enough. Your name is really difficult! Although I’m the one who named her.“ (Mao)

Oh, now she's the legendary hero? What happened to Aurum, then? Was he kicked out of the story for this annoying Mary Sue? Sure seems like it.

“ Understood, Master~ “ (Silviana)

“ Do you remember anything? “ (Mao)

“ Not at all~! “ (Silviana)

=Flashback, around 30 to 60 nether-minutes ago=

What now? A bit of consistency would be nice!

-Mao’s Lab-

Mao stared at Rikka’s ears and tails. He looked like a pervert with that glasses and endless drooling each time he gets excited. But still, every demon would stare at those ears and tails, for they were really extraordinary.

Not really. Disgaea has a shitload of catgirls with big boobs.

“ Hmhmhm.. You sure are interesting. Just who are you? “ (Mao)

“ I..? Don’t know. “ (Rikka)

“ What do you mean? “ (Mao)

“ Well.. I can’t even remember a thing.. “ (Rikka)

Yes, amnesia! How original, since it's only one of the most overused plotdevices in existence!

“ Hmph. This girl.. I can use her for now.. “ (Mao)

“ ? “ (Rikka)

“ Well, since you forgot, I’ll tell you. You promised that you will be my servant, don’t you? “ (Mao)

“ Eeeeh?? “ (Rikka)

“ Don’t lie! Even if you forgot, at least remember that! Oh, and your name.. Geez, at least remember your own name!“ (Mao)

Tricking her into being his servant... finally Mao makes a bit use of his 1.2 million EQ. Although since she's a Sue, this might not be the smartest move.

“ Err.. I don’t know.. “ (Rikka)

Mao looked at the label at Rikka’s collar tag. Rikka’s semi-long hair covered a bit of the carvings, so Mao pushed her hair back.

“ What this..? “ (Mao)

[ S1|_v13 ]

The author was having a stroke. There you go.

“ Maybe that’s her name? Or a code? “ (Mao)

“ Umm..? “ (Rikka)

“ Silviana. “ (Mao)

“ Eh? “ (Rikka)

“ It’s your name! Remember!! “ (Mao)

“ Sil..via..na? “ (Rikka)

Why are you speaking that way? Did the guy who created you accidentally transplant the brain of a slowpoke, Frankenstein Junior-style?

“ Forget it. Now, why don’t we go around the school? You might remember something. “ (Mao)

“ And.. You are? “ (Rikka)

“ Mao. I’m the overlord’s son. Oh, and call me Master. “ (Mao)

"Now get on your knees and kiss my feet!"

“ ..Got it.. Master..*sigh* I don’t really remember, but that will do it for now, I guess.. It’s a nice name, anyway. “ (Rikka)

! Starting from now, Rikka = Silviana!

Oh, not again! Can't you stick with a name for five minutes?!

=Meanwhile..=

-Evil Academy, School Corridors-

“ Say, Raspy. “ (Magisa)

“ Don’t call me that. What is it? “ (Beryl)

“ Do you think, by any chance, Mao could fall in lo~ve? “ (Magisa)

What part of "he is a demon" do you not understand? And no, Laharl is just the exeption to the rule.

“ !! What kind of—?! “ (Beryl)

“ Guess that means no, huh. But~ still~ Fufu 3 “ (Satsuki)

“ Just what are you trying to say? “ (Kyoko)

“ You know, nya. 80% of the boys we meet always ended falling in love with Rikka-nee. “ (Evriel)

This just proves my theory that Mary Sues radiate an aura that bewitches men - sort of like a succubus. Exept the "draining your lifeforce while doing you froggy-style"-part.

“ ..What did you say? But that’s!! “ (Asuka)

“ I said, nya! 80%! “ (Evriel)

“ Just who did Mao kidnapped?! “ (Beryl)

“ Rikka/Rikka-nee, nya “ (Fransisca, Evriel)

“ That’s right. “ (Haseo)

Meowth, that's - oh, I already made that joke.

“ Argh! Let’s go check on it soon! “ (Beryl)

=End of Flashback=

-Evil Academy, School Hall-

“ Damn YOU delinguent!! “ (Ghost HS)

“ That’s MY line!! Crappy honor student! “ (Ghost D)

*bang* *clash* *boom*

There's only so many ways I can say "WTF is going on?!"

Mao and Silvie, and a group of demons, turned their heads to the fighting demons. Some of the demons demanded them to fight more fiercely, while some other escaped.

“ What was that? “ (Silvie)

“ Huh. Another fight? Well, never mind.. “ (Mao)

“ Well.. I can’t object that. It’s the Netherworld, after all~ “ (Silvie)

Oh, humans in Disgaea can fight for stupid reasons as well.

Suddenly, the first ghost glanced at Silvie and pulled her from Mao.

“ Wha—?! “ (Silvie)

“ Ha! How’s this, delinguent?! You won’t hit her, right? With your so-called delinguent way! “ (Ghost HS)

“ !! You coward!! “ (Ghost D)

“ Hey, why am I dragged to this?! “ (Silvie)

Because demons are assholes. Deal with it.

“ Because you look weak! “ (Ghost HS)

“ Whaaaaat..?! “ (Silvie)

“ Hold on, weak girl! I’ll save you! “ (Ghost D)

“ *anime vein* You guys..!! Are..!! Really..!! “ (Silvie)

“ Huh?! “ (Ghost HS, D)

“ GETTING ON—MY—NERVES!!! “ (Silvie)

*insert Hulk-joke here*

“ What the?! “ (Mao)

“ OMEGA FIRE!! “ (Silvie)

Bitch, you are overpowered. WAY overpowered.

*boom*

=30 bombed-minutes later..=

Silvie stared around at the really messed up hall now. She sweatdropped and laughed a bit.

God, even in regular anime those sweatdrops are pissing me off, but in a written medium it's even worse. This is pointless, unless you're writing a script for a show instead of a fanfic!

Mao seemed as if he was about to burst out laughing. At that time, Raspberyl and The Animal Tree—alright—maybe just Magisa and Friends—arrived at the messed up hall.

“ Ahaha.. I think.. I overdid it? “ (Silvie)

“ Not ‘I think’!! But you HAVE overdid it!! “ (Beryl)

“ Ohh!! The school..!! “ (Kyoko, Asuka)

“ But I only used omega fire! Hmm.. was that too strong? “ (Silvie)

It is the strongest fire-spell in the game, so... YES, YOU IDIOT!

Mao couldn’t help it anymore.

“ Muhahaha!! Muhaha!! ‘Was that too strong’, indeed!! “ (Mao)

“ Ahh.. There goes the mad scientist. “ (Magisa)

“ Fufu, this is getting interesting.. “ (Satsuki)

*BGM : Muhahahahaha!!*

*Evriel : Nyahahahaha!! Err, why am I laughing?*

“ *anime vein* Anyways, SCRAM! I hate it when too much people gather! *runs* “ (Silvie)

Is this supposed to be funny? I don't get it. Maybe I need brain damage to understand that.

“ Hey, Silvie!! “ (Mao)

=5 Running-minutes later=

“ F-fast! “ (Haseo)

“ As expected of Rikka.. “ (Fransisca)

Silvie was not exactly running. She always jumped on high places, unconsciously.

She's a sleep-jumper?!

Well, it’s not difficult for Mao to follow her, though. But, it is difficult for the others to follow her. For example, our exhausted friends here..

“ W-water.. “ (Asuka, Kyoko)

“ Damn.. What is it with you guys?! We never saw demons running.. or JUMPING that fast!! Not even ninjas can do that! “ (Beryl)

I doubt that. We are talking about a game in which your attacks bring down meteors or destroy the earth.

“ We’re used to it, nyaa! “ (Evriel)

“ Then? Is that girl the one you’re talking about? “ (Beryl)

“ Yeah.. “ (Magisa)

“ Anyway, for now let’s just chase them! “ (Beryl)

“ Ehh?! We’re going to chase some mouse? “ (Evriel)

-Evil Academy, Classroom-

Ths fanfic jumps around more than Yoda on speed.

“ Wait, Silvie! “ (Mao)

Silvie finally stopped, and looked at the exhausted Mao. Yeah, he’s finally exhausted. Normally, no demons could follow Silvie at that pace.

Normally, demons are not complete pussies like in this fanfic.

“ Ah, sorry, sorry. So, where are we going now? “ (Silvie)

“ Home. “ (Mao)

“ I beg your pardon? “ (Silvie)

“ According to Geoffrey, the hero is at my home. “ (Mao)

Why?! That makes no sense!

“ ..Ah, you mean that Herodar.. “ (Silvie)

“ Forget it, let’s go! “ (Mao)

=Meanwhile..=

“ Hmhmhm.. “ (??)

Gee, I wonder if this is the bad guy. [/sarcasm]

A dark shadow silently watched Mao and Silvie, perfectly masking his presence.

“ So, that is the Overlord’s Son? My target sure is a Mad Scientist! “ (??)

The shadow disappeared with a magic circle.

“ Interesting! I, Roy The Civet or Paradoxurus hermaphroditus, shall make a fool outta him! “ (Roy)

Oh god. Even if the author didn't understand what she wrote, there is no way in hell that I can accept a guy with a vagina as a serious threat or even a villain.

*BGM : Wuhahahahaha!!*

---END

[Chapter Talk]

Magisa : That delinguent wasn’t much use to us! Damn, my plan failed!

Haseo : Calm down, calm down.. You’re talking like Mao!

Actually, she talks like a bad villain-cliche.

Evriel : *gives tea to everyone*

Satsuki : Why, thanks, dear~

Fransisca : Evriel’s special blended tea! Wow!

Evriel : *gives cookies to everyone*

Haseo : This sure is delicious~

Magisa : Hey, can I have some honey—Hey wait!! This is the chapter talk!

Evriel : Huh? What is it-nya?

All : …

A teaparty. Just when you think the segments after the regular chapters couldn't get any more pointless and annoying...

***


That's all, folks! For now, at least.

This is the best thing ever... It's like Fawful having a chat with someone from Zero Wing!

A winner is you!

Ain't that the truth. This fic is on the same level as "people die when they are killed!"

I want to hear this quote spoken aloud in real life before I die...