"Chosen one of the legendary" - guard of the twilight (Team Mock with SM2142), 111 Chapters of poor grammar, illegal song-use, and bestiality. Options

[Shockwave S08]

Have you ever encountered something so horrific and ugly, that it had to die? You know, besides the Flood, the Necromorphs, and all that other shit? This is SPARTAN-S08…

…and SM2142...

…reporting in once again with our next team mock. I decided to bring him along again, so things don’t get too out of hand. First thing’s first, we’ve gotta look at the character bios for Mr. Gary Stu and his Pokemon, which for some asinine reason are located on the author’s profile!

Name:Ryan
Species: Human
Sex: Male
Age: 17
Other: Ryan is the chosen one of the Pokemon god Arceus. He is destined to commit horrendous acts of bestiality whenever he sees fit. He has been a Pokemon trainer for several years and likes all of the evolutions of Eevee. Perhaps a bit TOO much. He was chosen at the age of fifteen to help bring down an origination known as Cronos tech.

Bitch, please, Ash Ketchum had saved the world countless times in the continuity you’re raping, thankyouverymuch.

When ever he fights them he is in a suit of armor and is known as the red dragon.

Oh look, he forgot to capitalize the title. Looks like this fic is gonna be akin to sticking your face in a power sander: A rough ride all the way through.

His main mission is to help all Pokemon in need and bring down Cronos tech.

The Former: Sounds a bit overwhelming, if you ask me.
The Latter: YOU JUST SAID THAT TWO SENTENCES AGO!

He and the legendary Pokemon Latias are currently in love.

Therein lies the problem…

(The Eevee forms are aged in Eevee years not human. Flygon is aged in human years.)

Consistency? What’s that?

Name:Aqua
Species: Vaporeon
Sex: Female
Age:24
Other: Aqua is the oldest in the group making her the leader other then Ryan. She was Ryan's first Pokemon, but they had a falling-out a few years ago. He got her when she was an Eevee. She is an accomplished healer having been trained by Ryan. She was the first in the group to have her element power modified. Because of all of Ryan's knowledge he was able to give her thunder type element powers and resistance as well as keeping her water powers.


HAAAAAAAAAAX!!!

Rejoice, ladies and gents, Dr. Hax returns!

Name: Flame (Oh, how original.)
Species: Flareon
Sex: Male
Age: 29
Other: Flame is second in command of the group. Ryan found him injured by a houndoom in woods when he was still an Eevee and nursed him back to health. He is very trustworthy, but harbors undying hatred for to Ryan for everything he did for him in the past. He also had his powers modified to include water attacks to help build a resistance to them.

How exactly that works, we’ll never find out.

Name: Jolt
Species: Jolteon
Sex: Male
Age: 21
Other: Ryan found Jolt shortly after finding Flame. At the time to was an Eevee as well. He has a little crush on Aqua but he don't want to tell her. He loves being in the forest and around the trees so he can show off. Ryan gave Jolt ground element powers to help him in fights where his electrical powers are of little help.

The only ground-type attacks that this species is capable of learning (as of Generation 5) are Sand Attack and Dig. If he’s using more than that, then I call hax once again.

Name Solar
Species: Espeon
Sex: Male
Age: 18
Other: Ryan saved Solar and his mate Moonlight from a group of houndoom after they mortally wounded both both (you said “both” twice, dumbass) of their mothers when they were still eggs. Solar and Moonlight are in no way related to each other.

Which now implies that they are.

He is a valued member of the group because of his psychic powers.

Name: Moonlight
Species: Umbreon
Sex: Female
Age: 18
Other: Moonlight is Solar's mate.

But probably also his sister as well.

The two of them were by Ryan as soon as they hatched. Over the course of the two years they were with them they fell in love with each other. The two of them travle (< spelling fail) with Ryan helping him fight Chonos tech.

Name: Star (Any 5-year-old on a sugar high could name these characters better.)
Species: Flygon
Sex: Female
Age: 22
Other: Star is the only one in the group they Ryan saved when she was fully evolved. She enjoyes travleing with Ryan and the others and has a very small crush on Ryan.

Do I smell a life-threatening love-triangle before we even start the fic?

She is very powerful and is a valuable asset to the group because of her ability to fly high up and do recon on the surounding area.

Four letters for you, Guard: STFU. Anyway, since this fic is far larger than anything we’ve done in the past, we’re gonna be alternating mocking duties for the first four chapters. Then, on every fifth chapter, we’re gonna band together and lay the smackdown on Mr. Twilight. And with that said, on with the show. I wish you the best of luck when we’re separated, Shawn.

You too, Spartan.

disclaimer: I don't own Pokemon. I only own my OCs

Most of which who are also Pokemon, so technically, they still belong to Nintendo.

Ch 1: Trouble in the forest

Ryan was a 17 year training to be a Pokemon healer and master, well that was until he was until the Pokemon god Arceus chose him to help bring down a group known as chronos Tech whose one goal is to capture all of the legendary Pokemon God this run-on sentence won’t fucking end MAKE IT STOP. He was chosen for the kindness he had shown towards all Pokemon.

I think his definition of “kindness” is much different than ours…

He was a different trainer, rather then fight a Pokemon and force it to come with him he finds injured Pokemon and helps heal them with a stolen RED team Medigun. Then if they wish they can join him on his quest. One of the gifts Arceus had given him was the ability to understand all Pokemon as well as enhanced strength and psychic powers.

In other words, god-tier hax.

Now our trainer is on the hunt for a injured Pokemon deep a forest.

What.

"Eevee I think it went this way." Ryan said

"You think so?" Eevee asked

"Yea look at the blood trail." He said pointing to a trail of crimson blood on the ground. "This looks bad."



"Lets hurry then to our inevitable doom." Eevee said

The two of them followed the trail of blood till they entered a clearing.

The perfect killzone, all laid out just for me!

In the middle of it was a Kirlia with a large gash on its left shoulder. It saw them and tried to run but fell to the ground. Rather then try and go over to it Ryan sat down and started to try and reach out to the Kirlia with his mind.

Unfortunately, he only got its voice-mail.

He felt something brush against his mind (specifically the barrel of SPARTAN-S08’s M6D pistol) and opened it just enough to talk to it.

"Hello." Ryan said

"Who the fuck are you and what the fuck do you want?" The Kirlia asked

"My name is Ryan." He started "I want to help you but I can't unless you trust me."

"Why should I trust you?" She asked everyone who was reading this.

"I am going to let you look through my memories." Ryan said opening his mind all the way." You will find I mean you know harm."

So you’re telling me that he’s saying that you know the definition of “harm”?

Ryan knew he was taking a big risk. If she wanted to she could kill him right then and there.

Please do, for everyone’s sake. Show him no mercy!

After several minutes she spoke again.

"You are the chosen one of Arceus?" She asked

"Yes." He said. "I was on the way to meet him when I sensed you in trouble."

"I need more time to think." She said

"Take all the time you need." Ryan said pulling out a radio "Aqua you there?"

Hey asshole, you’re friggin’ psychic, use your mind bullets instead!

"Yea I am here what's up?" A female voice said

"Have the others get the camp set up we are staying here tonight." Ryan said "And when you get the chance send Star out to get an areal recon of the area."

"OK no problem." Aqua said

"Who was that? YOU MUST DIE!" The Kirlia asked said, before pulling off all of Ryan’s limbs with her psychic powers, leaving him to die from a bleed-out. THIS STORY IS MESSY END.

"That was Aqua my vaporeon." Ryan said "She is the eldest of the group and leader when I am out and about."

"Oh I see." She said "And Star?"

"She is my Flygon." Ryan said

After several minutes Ryan noticed the sky getting dark. Closing his eyes his eyesight changed and he could see the life force of things around him, what he saw was not good. It looked like a large amount of houndoom were closing in on them.

I see we’re ripping off Riddick now…you fail a thousand times, Guard!

"Sorry to rush you but we need to get out of here now." Ryan said

"Why?" She asked

"Come into my mind ass and I will show you." Ryan said

She entered Ryna's mind ass and saw what he saw.

Wait, when did this new character get here? You mean that’s a spelling error?

▄██████████████▄▐█▄▄▄▄█▌
██████▌▄▌▄▐▐▌███▌▀▀██▀▀
████▄█▌▄▌▄▐▐▌▀███▄▄█▌
▄▄▄▄▄██████████████▀

"Please get me out of here!" She said
"OK don't worry I got you." Ryan said picking her up farting her out "Eevee lets go.

They took off into the woods toward camp when they were cut off by three houndoom Chaos daemons.

"Oh hell." Ryan said putting Kirlia down. "Eevee use protect I will take care of these mutts."

"Got it." Eevee said as a green shield went around her and Kirlia

"Will he be all right?" Kirlia asked

"I am more worried for the houndoom daemons…NOT." Eevee said

Ryan took a fighting cowardly stance as the first houndoom daemon charged him. With one swift movement he Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked Ryan the houndoom into a tree. The other two daemons charged him and the result was Ryan’s death. THIS STORY IS HELLISH END. the same only this time he kicked one into the other.

"Lets go." He said picking Eevee and Kirlia up and putting them in his pack.

They kept going avoiding the attacked until Ryan knew he had to get out fast.

"Aqua we got trouble." Ryan said over the radio

Do all of his Pokemon have earpieces or something!?

"What's going on?" She asked

"I got houndoom on my tail and I need an exit now." Ryan said

Do you see a red EXIT sign anywhere? You’re in a forest, dipshit.

"Got it Star is on her way." Aqua said

"Get the medical area ready as well I am bring a Kirlia with a large cut on her left shoulder." Ryan said

"Understood." Aqua said

"You two get your heads in there and keep them down." Ryan said "Thank god Star were over here!"

Did Guard of the Twilight get his grammar skills from Squirrelking? Who TALKS like that!?

"I see you." Star said flying just low enough for him to grab on to her neck. "Is the Kirlia OK?"

"Yea." Ryan said "Lets get back to camp."



Well everyone this is my first Pokemon fic. For all of you here that are Spyro the dragon fans as well check out my other story Power of the twilight.

That character’s about as culturally relevant as Crash Bandicoot. As in, not much, if at all. So shut it before you get a faceful of rockets.

This post has been edited by Shockwave S08: Apr 13 2013, 06:26 PM

[SM2142]

Hey folks! It's my turn to mock the next chapter in this team mock. We have a lot of ground to cover so let's get right to it! Load up your Trail Carbines and set mini-nukes on obliterate, because this is going to be one hell of a ride.

disclaimer: I don't own Pokemon. I only own my Ocs

Your “Ocs”? If you were going for “Orcs” you missed the r.

Ch 2: Camping is a legitimate strategy.

After flying for a few minuets Star landed in the camp head first.
"It's safe you you to come out now." Ryan said

Did Ryan suffer a stroke just now?

"So this is your camp?" Kirlia asked

No, it's just his vacation home which happens to be a tent. DURR!

The camp had several tents as well as evolved forms of Eevee.

"Aqua where are you?" Ryan asked

Probably spending plenty of time away from YOU.

"I am right here, idiot." A Vaporeon said but this vapeorion was different, she had pale yellow lines on her body.

"Lets get you patched up." Ryan said as they heading inside.

Another story with inconsistent verb tenses? I fear for the future of humanity...

The tent was much bigger on the inside.

Are we ripping off Harry Potter now with the magic tents? Unoriginal!

"How are all of these rooms here?" Kirlia asked

"It's a new technology that I won't bother explaining because the concept is utterly retarded." Ryan said "I am not too sure how it works my self. I think it shrinks anything you put into it or something like that."

But if it shrinks you, wouldn't that crush your skeletal structure?

"Wow, I am not impressed." Kirlia said

Ryan took her to a room with a table as well as draws filled with berries and other things.

Such a poorly written story, even a first-grader would say, “Damn, this is horrible!”

"That's one nasty looking cut." Aqua said looking at it. "It really messed you up."

"I will be alright." She said "Your Pokemon seam different."

They “seam” different? Do they all have a way of weaving or sewing things?

"All of my Pokemon are more human then you think." Ryan said "I showed them how to do all kinds of different things like when I get lonely at night."

"What Pokemon do you have?" Kirlia asked

"Well I have Aqua, Star, and Eevee." Ryan started "Then you got Jolt he is my Jolteon, Flame my Flareon, Solar my Espeon and Moonlight my Umbreon."

"Wait YAWN." Kirlia said " That's seven Pokemon I though trainers could only have six."

"Normally yes." Ryan said "I am a special case."

"How so?" She asked

Let's just say he's not playing with a full deck...

"Have you ever heard of a team known as Cronos Tech?" Ryan asked her

"Yea...they're part of the NCAA right?" She said "My last trainer was part of them. I ran away from him after I destroyed my pokeball."

"I see derp..." Ryan said as his brain farted.

"Your not going to take me back to him are you?" She asked, “Because if you do you're a dead man!

"No," Ryan said "Did your master ever talk about a guy called the red dragon?"

"Yea he's some pansy trainer who isn't very bright or in any way the prodigy he thinks he is." she said "He said that the red dragon was taking all of their captured Pokemon and freeing boning them."

"Did he ever say what he looked like?" Ryan asked

"Yea he always had on a strange red armor life jacket that had a helm shaped like a dragon's head watermelon." She said "I wish I could meet him just to laugh at his sorry ass."

"Well my dear." Aqua said "You already have."

"WHAT?" she said "Ryan your the red dragon?"

Apparently no one here knows how to use apostrophes.

"Yep." He said "I was given special permission to carry up to twenty Pokemon to aid me in the fight against them."

"Wow." She said as he started laughing at his face, making Ryan feel horrible.

"Let me get your shoulder taken care of then I will show you the armor." Ryan said

"OK" she said."You will be gentle right You know you look a lot dumber in person, right?" She asked blushing

"Yes. " Ryan said "I wont hurt you, much."

"Thanks." She said "It's sorta cold in here."

"You will get used to it, he doesn't know how to start a campfire." Aqua said

"I have been meaning to ask." Kirlia said "Why do you have yellow lines on you?"

"Well you know how when two Pokemon of different breeds mate the young can gain traits from both parents right Ryan painted me against my will." Aqua said

"Yea." She said

"Ryan found a way to add elements to Pokemon using evolution stones." Aqua said "He gave me electric powers."

"How is that possible?" Kirlia asked Ryan

It's not, but we'll surely get some half-assed explanation anyway.

"When you learn as much about Pokemon as I have anything is possible." Ryan said "OK lets take a look at the cut."

Oh sure, anything is possible if you just believe! YEAH RIGHT!

At that time Ryan noticed many scars across her body as well as a black collar around her neck.

Aw shit, I'm glad Shockwave didn't do this chapter...

"My god what happened?" Ryan asked her

"My old master beat me when ever I lost or disobeyed him I fell on a rake." She said with a tear in her eye

"Oh my I am so sorry." Aqua said gently pulling her close to her. "Ryan is nothing like that."

"I can tell." Kirlia said "You all think so highly of him He looks like a clueless moron"

"He earned that respect title from saving us." Aqua said "Oh dear she has a control collar on."

"Lets get it off." Ryan said "Kirlia please tilt your head down, we may need to amputate that head of yours."

"OK." She said

"Looks like an electronic lock." Ryan said "Aqua can you get my laptop?"

"Yea hold on I don't have hands, asshole!" She said heading out of the room.

"Is this going to hurt?" She asked
"I am not going to lie." Ryan said "Yes it will but you will feel better once its off."

Creepy...

"OK." She said as Aqua came back in with the laptop."

"Thanks Aqua." Ryan said as he plugged it into the slot on the back of the collar. "Looks like a simple code to hack this should only take a few minuets."

Really? Collars are that complicated here? What else did they waste their money researching?

Ryan started hacking the small computer in the collar. After about two minuets he got access.

"Piece of cake." Ryan said "OK this next part is going to hurt. Tell me when your ready."

Ryan started early before Kirlia could answer.

"Ready GAAAAAAH!." Kirlia said bracing herself

"OK control serum flow to 0." Ryan said "Retracting injection spikes."

Wait, what serum?

At that time Kirlia winced in pain.

"Unlocking collar." Ryan said as the lock unlocked. "I am taking it off now."

"OK." Kirlia said

Ryan gently lifted the collar off Kirlia's neck. There were two small holes in the side of her neck now spurting blood everywhere.

"Well it's not as bad as I though it was going to be." Ryan said "We will get you fixed up now. Aqua can you get me my Mortar and Pestle, a vial of spring water, and some bandages."

Ryan, you weren't the one in pain. Allow me to introduce YOU to it later.

"Sure." Aqua said

"What is that?" Kirlia asked looking at a strange brown stone and a small jar of green gel.

"The stone is an antiseptic stone my kidney stone." Ryan said "I am going to grind it up then mix it with water after which your going to have to drink it."

"Why?" She asked

"It will kill any infection in your body from your wounds because I'm just that nuts." Ryan said

"What about the gel?" She asked

"It's a healing gel hair gel." Ryan said "I dont trust potions made by companies so I make my own stuff."

"How do you know all of this?" She asked
"I trained under Shaymin for a few months use cheat codes." Ryan said

"You trained under the great healer?" Kirlia said

"Yep she is going to be at Mew's birthday party No." Ryan said "You will be able to meet her if you want to come."

"Birthday?" Kirlia said

"What you don't think they celebrate their birthday?" Ryan asked

People celebrate Mew's birthday? LAME!

"Not really." She said

" She is turning 1600 in two days." Ryan said

"Wow I don't care." Kirlia said

"I got the stuff." Aqua said.

"Thanks a lot." Ryan said as he crushed up the kidney stone.

"Who else is going to be there?" She asked

"Well mew," Draco started "The three dogs, the lake trio, Ho-oh, Dialga , Palkia , Shaymin, Cresselia, Darkria and many others."

All in the same place...sure seems like a good place to ambush them...

"Did you say Darkria?" Kirlia asked

"Yea." Ryan said as he put some hair gel on the wound on her shoulder. "Darkria is not the evil monster everyone thinks he is."

"How can you be so sure? GAAH, THAT STINGS!" She asked yelled

"Because I am friends with him." Ryan said putting the gel on her neck

"He is the one who causes nightmares." Kirlia said

Uh...how?

"I know but he don't like to." Ryan said with a Southern accent, holding out a vial of liquid "Can you please drink this."

Kirlia drank the vial and nearly throw-up.

"What was that?" She asked

"The stone." Ryan said as Star came in.

"Are you alright little one?" Star asked

"I am NOT fine." She said

"If you want to wash up there is a portable shower in the next room." Ryan said

Yeah...in a TENT...

"Thanks." She said and left

"How is she?" Star asked

"She is going to be fine." Ryan said "A goodnight sleep with me and she will be right as rain."

"Do you think she will want to come with us?" Aqua asked

"I think she will may try and kill me." Ryan said as Kirlia came out of the back room.

Moonlight came running in.

"Moon is something wrong?" Ryan asked

"A human in Spartan armor is coming toward the camp." She said

"What does he look like?" Ryan asked

"Looks like 5'5 sixteen maybe seventeen he wants to kill everything within a 5 mile radius." She said

"Oh no..."Kirlia said

"What?" Ryan asked her

"That sounds like my old trainer Spartan S-08." She said starting to cry.

"Relax I got you." Ryan said picking her up and heading down a hall "Time for him to meet the red dragon."

Yeah, kid, your odds aren't that great against a Spartan.

Well looks like the old trainer is coming to try and find his Pokemon. I almost feel sorry for him.

Well that's it for now folks, I'll be back in chapter 4.

[Shockwave S08]

disclaimer: I don't own Pokemon. I only own my OCs, who, ironically enough are about to get pwned by a SPARTAN-II.

Ch 3: Another one bites the dust

*singing* And another one gone, and another one gone, another one bites the dust. Hey, I’m gonna get you too, another one bites the dust.

Ryan headed down a long hall with Kirlia in his arms.

"Where are we going?" She asked

"To get my armor." Ryan said as he opened a door.

Inside the room was a table that had red cardboard armor all over it.

"This is it." Ryan said as he started putting the armor deflated life jacket on.

After he had most of the armor on he took the watermelon-helm and strapped a sword made out of rotten sausage-links to his back.

"How does the armor work?" She asked him

"It's bio mechanical falls apart when struck with...anything, really." Ryan said

It's what?" She asked

"I will not explain it later at all, bitch. Deal with it.." Ryan said

"Oh OK." She said looking at him.

"You ready?" He asked her

"As ready as I will ever be." She said as they headed back out of the tent.

A teen SPARTAN-S08 walked out of the woods and into the camp.

"Is anyone here?" The teen supersoldier asked

"Can I help you?" Ryan asked

"I am looking for one ‘Ryan Jaster’ my Kirlia, have your seen her him anywhere?"

"Yes but you can't have her me." Ryan said "Cronos creep."

"How do you know I am Cronos? I know you are, but what am I?” He yelled

"I am the red dragon that's how." Ryan said putting the helm on.

"Oh hell I am out of here! Do you honestly think I’m scared of you?" He said turning to run and coming face to face with the Eevee group unholster his Badass Rifle from his back. "I am You’re dead."

"Not yet I’m your not." Ryan said drawing his blade of meat "If you don't get on the ground now you will be."

He did not argue he got down on the sandy earth.
Unfazed by Ryan's threat, and with his augmented reflexes kicking in, SPARTAN-S08 quickly made short work of Ryan and his Pokemon with one prolonged burst from the deadliest weapon in his arsenal. THIS STORY IS…TO BE CONTINUED?

"Star go get the cops if you please." Draco said

"Be back in a flash." She said and took off.

Ryan sat there waiting for Star to get back. After about a half hour Star came back with Officer Jenny following in a chopper.

"Well looks like you bagged another one." She said "Are all of his Pokemon here?"

"All except this Kirlia." Ryan said "She is under my protection."

"Understood." She said "See you later."

"Well Kirlia that takes care of that." Ryan said "You welcome to stay here with us tonight. If you wish you may leave tomorrow or you can come with us."

"I will think about it and tell you in the morning." She said yawning.

"Follow me I will get you set up in a bed." Ryan said

[SM2142]

disclaimer: I don't own Pokemon. I only own my Ocs

Oh, you meant your characters. Still, I'm not sorry for that Orc thing.

Ch 4: A night of painful memories for Ryan

When last we left Ryan, he had gotten into a one-sided fight with a Spartan II. Ryan and his band of giant rodents were killed in such a way that even a Caesar's Legion recruit would say, “Damn, that was excessive.” Regardless, Ryan had to restart from his last checkpoint and now he tries to not bring the wrath of the Spartan upon him again.

Everyone was getting ready for bed except moonlight who was sitting in the middle of camp.

Now the author forgets to capitalize names AGAIN.

"Is she going to go to sleep?" Kirlia asked as they headed into the recently-burned tent

"She will in a couple hours when Jolt comes to take over." Ryan said "She is standing watch."

"Oh I see Expecting that guy from last chapter to come back?." she said

"Everyone takes two hour shifts." Ryan told her. "My shift is early morning just after Star's"

"You guys have everything planned out Just keep telling yourself that." Kirlia said

"Pretty much." Ryan said "Well here is my room."

Ryan's room was a decent size with a large bed and a nightstand next to it.

I hope he doesn't open that nightstand. Who knows what lurks within.

"You can either sleep on the bed with me and Eevee or I can make you a bed on the floor.

"You let you Pokemon sleep in bed with you?" She asked

Aw shit, this is getting awkward...

"Yea it don't bother me any." Ryan said, having regained his southern accent.

"I just figured it might a little cramped" she said

"Cramped I will tell you cramped." Ryan said laughing "Wait till a large storm comes through then everyone wants to stay in here with me then we all have some “fun”. The only one that likes the storms is Aqua and that's if there is no lighting"

"Oh. If you really don't mind I would like to stay up there with you two." she said blushing

This is going to get bad...FAST!

"There is nothing to be embarrassed about." Eevee said

"I know it's just a little strange that's all." Kirlia said

A LITTLE? You barely know this asshole!

"I am going to go change right here in front fo you." Ryan said heading into another room.

"Are you planning on joining out group?" Eevee asked

"I don't know." she said jumping up to the bed. "Ryan seams to be such a nice creepy person, its just there is something different about him that sets him apart from other trainers."

Oh there's plenty that sets him apart from anyone else. He lacks common sense and sanity.

"It's his love for his Pokemon." Eevee said

Which kind of “love”?

"That and the trust he has toward Pokemon he never met before." Kirlia said wishing to murder Ryan at the next chance she got.

"What do you mean?" Eevee asked

"You know how psychic Pokemon can talk with their mind." Kirlia said

"Yea." Eevee said

"They can kill with it also." Kirlia said "If they can get all the way into someones mind, when we first met he opened his mind to me all the way as if knowing that and I would not want to kill him."

"That's just how he is." Eevee said "Why do you think Arceus chose him."

Because he was just that easy to manipulate?

"I guess your right." she said "Just how close is he with his Pokemon?"

"Very close." Eevee said "He would do anything for us."

OK, things just got bad. Moving on to “worse”...

"I see." She said "I think I am going to join the group, if he will let me."

Just then Ryan came back in a pair of shorts got back into the conversation even though he didn't go anywhere.

"Well ladies time for bed." Ryan said

"Ryan..." Kirlia said

"Yes?" He asked

"I would like to join the group Why are you naked?." she said "If that's alright."

"Of course it is Because my balls need to breathe." Ryan said "On other thing you need to know about the group."

Proofreading is not a strength this author has...

"What?" She asked

"I very rarely keep any of the Pokemon in a pokeball. I usually keep them down my pants" Ryan said

"That's fine with me." Kirlia said "I hate those things."

"You and me both." Eevee said

We all know why he keeps them outside...

"OK lets get you into a pokeball." Ryan said pulling out a luxury ball and handing it to her.

She tapped the butten of the ball and let herself be captured without a fight, shewas then quickly let back out by Ryan who then asked her to get back in for shits and giggles.

"Welcome to the group." Ryan said

"I am not happy to be in it." She said smiling

"Alright lets get some sleep." Ryan said as he laid down. "We got a long day ahead of us."

Well it could be worse.

Eevee jumped up and curled into a small ball on his chest. Kirlia just put her head on the far side of the pillow and went to sleep. Ryan woke up about an hour later to the soft sound of someone crying. He looked over and saw it was Kirlia a Witch.

"What's wrong?" He asked

"Nightmare." She said
Suddenly, Ryan startled the witch who proceeded to maul him into a bloody mess. Once again, Ryan had to restart.

"It's OK I'm trying to sleep, idiots." Eevee said now fully awake
"Come over here and talk about it if you want to."

"Thanks," She said moving over into Ryan's arms.

Go to alert stage Yellow!

"So what happened?" Ryan asked her

"It's was memories of everything I had to deal with from my old master." She said tears still her eyes.

"It's OK." Ryan said softly. "He can't hurt you any more, no one can."

Trust me, Ryan, if anyone needs to get hurt, it's YOU.

"I know it's just hard to let go of the past." she said

I guess the magic used in your tents can't make things NOT dream!

"Trust me I know what its like to have problems in the past. I was always too special to be at school, according to me, so I never really went there." Ryan said

"What happened to you?" She asked

"It was two years ago. I think it was two years, but I think a mile is as long as a ping-pong table" Ryan said "This was before I was chosen by Arceus during that drug-induced seizure. I had a girlfriend named Nala who was a lion. I had some problems with Cronos tech back then because they always beat our school in football. They ambushed us and killed her in the process she tried to catch a t-shirt being thrown into the crowd. I tried to save her but I could not and she died in my arms."

I hope I made that story bearable.

"That's horrible hilarious." Kirlia said hugging him

"I just wish I could bring her back." Ryan said "Celebi offered to take me back so I could stop it from happening but I knew that I would not be picked by Arceus then, so I put the well being of the world in front of my happiness."

So the world is better off WITH you? Oh, I beg to differ...

"I am sorry." Kirlia said "I should not have had you dig that up."

"It's fine." Ryan said "Now lets get some sleep jiggy with it."

Just a little look at Ryan's past.

Does he have any other skeletons in the closet?

[Shockwave S08]

disclaimer: I don't own pokemon. I only own my OCs

Ch 5: Morning wood watch

Ryan woke up early the next morning with a raging boner to take his time standing watch. Kirlia was in the same place she was last night but Eevee was curled in a ball next to his head. Kirlia was talking in her sleep.

"Please... don't stop." she said in her sleep

Scratch what Shawn said, we’re going to Threat Level Red, NOW!

"Sounds like someone is haveing a good dream." Ryan though as he got dressed and headed out of the tent. However, he tripped on a nearby rock, making him fall face-first into the campfire.

CRITICAL MISSION FAILURE
(X) Load [(A) Continue] (B) Exit

When he got outside Star was sitting on a stump in the center of camp laughing at him because he died and respawned. Ryan went over and put his hand on her shoulder bitch-slapped her.

"I can take over now. Shut up and get me the burn ointment!" Ryan said "You go get some rest."

"Your shift don't start for another hour." She said, making fun of Ryan’s southern accent.

"Don't worry about it. Fuck you." Ryan said with a smile frown.

"Thanks for nothing." she said giving him a kiss on the cheek punch to the gonads and headed to her tent.

Ryan sat there meditating for about thirty miniuets before he felt something pull on off his shorts, it was Kirlia and Eevee.

"Hey what are you two doing up." He asked them

"You were gone and I came to find you beat the living shit out of you." Kirlia said blushing "Your the only human that has ever shown my any kindness...NOT!"

Someone didn’t like English class too much, it seems…

"Hey don't worry about it it's what I do." Ryan said smileing "Oh by the way did you know you talk in you sleep?"

"I do?" She asked "Oh no...did I reveal my plans to murder you?"

"Don't worry I did not hear anything bad good." Ryan said

"Oh ok." She said still blushing "Who is that?"

A woman was walking up to the camp. She was a little taller then Ryan and had a pink flower on each side of her headin her green hair.

"Hey Shaymin long time no see." Ryan said hugging her.

"I see your still doing well." She said



The only Pokemon that are officially powerful enough to do that are Latias and Latios. And even then, they chose not to speak in their human forms.

"Your Shaymin?" Kirlia said

Do you have wax in your ears or something? Didn’t you hear what Ryan just said two sentences ago?

"Yes," she said "Well in my human form anyway."

"It's [truley] an honor to meet you." Kirlia said bowing


WRONG!!!

"Nice to meet you too," she said "You here for Mew's birthday?"

"Oh you mean the "emergency meeting" Ryan said laughing "She is going to be so shocked its not funny."

This fic already isn’t funny to begin with. Not without our comments, at least.

"Yep." Shaymin said "You care if I travel there with you guys Care to be Deathclaw bait?"

"Not at all. Sure." Ryan said "We wont be leaving for atleast another month hour."

"Maybe sooner later." Eevee said as everyone came out of their tent.

"Shaymin good to see you again." Aqua said walking over to them.

"Nice to see you too." Shaymin said "How are your healing skills coming along?"

"Great. Not well…" Aqua said

"Thats good." She said smileing

"Ok everyone lets get camp packed up." Ryan said

I wonder who gets to carry all of this shit?

It took them about an hour millennia to break everything down and pack up. All of the pokemon had a pack careing some stuff from the camp.

OK, I know it’s important to look after your goods so they don’t get stolen, but this is ridiculous…

"Everyone ready?" Ryan asked

"I think so. No." Aqua said

"Lets go then." Ryan said as they headed off to the next town.

Well looks like Shaymin is going to join them for a little while.

And with any luck, they’ll all die by getting attacked by a herd of Magikarp.

This post has been edited by Shockwave S08: Mar 25 2012, 01:07 PM

[SM2142]

disclaimer: I don't own Pokemon. I only own my Ocs

Still making that mistake in the first line? This fic is beyond redemption.

Ch 6: The Pokemon center raises it's price for medical care

Ryan and the others made it to the Pokemon center in Eternally Messed-Up City to pick-up a note left by the Mesprit for him. When he got there there was a guy there saying he was him.

So this weirdo thinks he's Ryan?

"I am here to pick up a note left here for me." He said

Who's talking? We're hardly into this chapter and already I'm lost.

"OK I just need the password." Joy said "What is most important to the body?"

"Uh can't you just give me the note Bacon Strips." He said

"You not Ryan." Joy said "Ryan just walked in.

The guy looked behind him and said "Oh Like hell he is."

He then through down a small gray ball and disappeared in a puff of smoke.

I think you mean “threw”, but it's better to just assume you didn't proofread this thing.

"Hell that was Crozen." Ryan said in a bland tone

"Who is Crozen?" Kirlia asked

"One of the leaders of Cronos tech." Ryan said

You don't say...

"Joy may I please have my note?"

"After you give me the password." She said "What is most important to the body?"

"Heart and soul my sweet Heroin." Ryan said

"It's not you alright." She said giving him a note anyway. "Tell Mew Mew I said hi."

"Will do Hey, that was easy." Ryan said

"Who is Mew Mew?" Kirlia asked

"Its what we call Mew in public." Ryan whispered

If you're trying to be cute with that, it's not working.

"Oh I see." She said "So where are we of to now?"

"Deep under Mt. Coronet." Ryan said "That's where the lost city of certain death is."

"Lost city?" She asked

"It's where the meetings are held every six months or when ever one is deemed needed. No one has come out of there. Ever." Ryan said

"How long has it been since the last meeting?" Kirlia asked

"About six months years." Ryan said

Upon reaching the mountain Ryan moved a rock out of the way revealing a large passageway. They walked down the passageway for several minuets before coming to a large stone door which is a polite way of saying “another big rock revealing another passageway”.

"Time to unseal the door." Ryan said cutting his hand on a rock while listening to “How Could This Happen To Me?”

"What are you doing?" Kirlia yelled

"I am drawing the symbol to unseal the door." Ryan said opening the note and drawing a strange symbol on the door. He messed it up multiple times so he needed more blood. By the time he finished, he was in need of a serious transfusion.

After drawing the symbol Ryan put some all of his healing gel on his hand hoping he wouldn't need any more ever again.

The door started to shake and glow then it opened fell over on top of him.

"Welcome to the lost city." Ryan said from under the slab

Well they are at the lost city know how knows whats going to happen. Also remember the more reviews I get the faster I add chapters.

No matter how many reviews you get, it doesn't help your grammar.

[Shockwave S08]

disclaimer: I don't own Pokemon. I only own my OCs

Ch 7: Latias's ambush.

The large stone door opened to reveal a large city. As they stepped inside they were greeted grumpily by Latios.

Wait, didn’t he die at the end of Pokemon Heroes?

Hey Ryan." He said floating over and giving the standard greeting: A face-crushing headbutt.

"Hey Latios." Ryan said looking around disoriented. "You seen your sister anywhere?"

"Nope." Latios said as his neck began to extend. "All I know is she doesn’t want to see you is waiting for you around here somewhere."

"OK thanks." Ryan said "I just got to watch my back. You never know when you might get backstabbed by a Spy."

"I got some stuff to do so I will see you in Hell later." Shaymin said leaving.

The city it's self was in very good condition considering its underground. All of the buildings were made of stone tissue paper were about the size of an average house. At the south end of the city was a large toxic lake, at the north was a very large building that was used to hold the meetings. As they headed through the city Ryan looked everywhere every time he heard something.

"Hey Aqua." Kirlia whispered. "Why is Ryan so jumpy?"

His fear has made him jumpy, and it is well-founded.

"It's a sorta game he and Latias play." Aqua said. "Whenever he comes here she is always in hiding waiting to jump him. They had an encounter of sorts a year or so ago shortly after they fell in love."

And just from that sentence alone, we can see that this fic has stooped down to the same level as “All That is Forbidden”.

"They love each other?" Kirlia asked.

"More then you know." Aqua said with a grin.

"So wait your telling me that they mated?" Kirlia asked.


Bow chicka honk honk!

"Maybe, maybe not." Aqua said "That's for you to figure out. It won't be too hard to tell when she finds him, she’ll either embrace him, or tear his guts out."

They follow Ryan to a large building in the center of the city. They found Ho-Oh inside.

"Greetings Ryan. Now where’s my money?" Ho-Oh said

"Hello Ho-Oh." Ryan said walking toward a couch they brought down for him. "Have you seen Latias anywhere?"

"I can't say that I have. She was seen purchasing a concealable blade earlier, if that helps…" He said

"I know she is here somewhere." Ryan said sitting down. "I can almost feel it."

Just then he heard something behind him, he quickly stood up and turned around.

"There you aren't..." Ryan said. " Sorry about that Ho-Oooooooooooooooooooo!"

Latias tackled him into the couch as he was turning around and lip locked him for a good minute before letting go.

"Got you again." She said with a smile." I missed beating the shit out of you."

"I missed you too." Ryan said looking into her eyes.

"Still at it I see." A voice said.

Leaning against the wall was [Darkria].

1. He got the spelling of “Darkrai” wrong
2. This misspelling goes on for the entire fic, so might as well get used to it being butchered like that.

"Hey Darkria." Ryan said walking over to him.

"So that's Darkria." Kirlia though hiding behind Ryan's legs massive schlong.

"Who do we have here?" Darkria asked looking at Kirlia.

"She is the newest to the group." Ryan said. "Come to think of it you haven’t gone through initiation we have not given you a name yet. What would you like to be called? Also, someone get me the beer keg…"

"I like the name Aurora." Kirlia said.

"A fine name. Now drink this entire kegger without throwing up." Darkria said.

"Ryan you were right he is just as evil as I anticipated not all that bad." Kirlia said with a look of pure terror on her face smile.

"Of course not." Darkria said. "Then again with the nickname the nightmarer it's no wonder everyone thinks that."

"Speaking of dreams have you seen Cresselia?" Ryan asked

What’s with all of these legendaries coming out of the woodwork here!?

"Did someone say my name?" Cresselia said floating in. "Oh Ryan your here already."

"Of course." Ryan said hugging her. "How have you been?"

"Just fine." She said with a smile. "I can't wait for the party...OF DEATH."

"Has everything been set up?" Ryan asked.

"Latias and Ifinished it just before you got here. No, we’re all too lazy to get anything done."She said. "Want to see?"

"Yea lets go." Ryan said. "Everyone just leave the packs here. We can get them later."

Everyone took off their packs of C4 and followed Ryan. Latias was flying around him in circles and was doing loops.

"Wow she is hyper." Aurora said.

"What do you expect she has not see her lover for six months." Aqua said.

Bitch please, I was on Second Life with Mari’Tasi vas Nedas, and even I didn’t have to wait that long to see her regularly.

"You have a point." She said blushing. "From what I can tell they did mate."

Is that really necessary information, Aurora!?

"For humans it's called sex, but your right." Aqua said. "Tonight is the first anniversary of the day they first met."

"Wow," she said

"I wouldn't be surprised be expressing sheer disgust if they did it again tonight." Aqua said.

"You think so?"She asked sarcastically.

"Yep." Aqua said. "So if he leave with her don't try and follow."

"I wont." Aurora said pointing a gun at her head, wishing for it all to stop blushing even redder.

Interesting little chapter right here I think. It's only going to get worse better. Possible combustible lemon between Ryan and Latias soon if I feel like writing it.

SPOILER ALERT: He actually goes ahead and does one, but that’ll have to wait until Chapter 12.

This post has been edited by Shockwave S08: Apr 17 2012, 12:51 PM

[SM2142]

disclaimer: I don't own Pokemon. I only own my Ocs

Ch 8: The party room with spiked punch and more guests for making beer runs

Ryan and the others entered the main hall of the temple where the meetings parties were held to find everything nothing needed to have an awesome party. There was lights, a DJ booth, and even a mirror ball. The stuff was still in the crates they arrived in.

"Oh yea she is going to love this." Ryan said sarcastically. "How did you guys get all this?"

"We found looted a lot of this stuff years ago." Cresselia said. "You can thank Raikou and Zapdos for the electrical power."

I see, exploit the elemental powers of another for your “party”.

"Do you know when Mew will get here?" Ryan asked.

"Tomorrow morning originally, but Mew recently said “screw you guys, I'm goin' home” so it looks like this was all for nothing." Latias said putting her arms around Ryan.

"That's good." Ryan said. "What about food?"

"We have all of the food on ice right now so everything will be perfect tomorrow unless the temperature melts it. Then it'll spoil." Cresselia said.

"I take it you got the music taken care of as well." Ryan said.

"Yep." Cresselia said. "During his spare time away from the lake Azelf plays at a night club in his human form. Even he has to have some fun once and a while."

I can't begin to comprehend how dumb of an idea that was.

"Wow I never knew that." Ryan said. "I will have to not go there sometime."

Just then there was a strange snapping sound and Rotom appeared as an angry snapping turtle took a bite out of Ryan's foot.

"Well looked who showed up." Darkria said as Ryan yelled in pain.

"Yea I got board so I decided to come." He said. "Mew here yet?"

"Nope." Ryan said, his neck also beginning to stretch. "Not till tomorrow whenever we're not ready."

"Well I am going to look around." He said and floated off.

Well that was pointless.

"He normally don't show up." Darkria said with a newly acquired southern accent.

Are accents like the common cold here? They just come and go from time to time.

Just then there was a strange coldness that entered the room and a large shadow on the floor.

Yet another sentence fail.

"Hey it's not me." Darkria said thinking everyone was accusing him of letting one rip.

"Whats wrong Darkria." A female voice said. "Forget I was coming."

"Hey I know that voice We're in deep shit." Ryan said. "Giratina is that you?"

"Can't fool you can I." She said coming out of the shadow.

"How have you been?" Ryan asked her.

"Not too bad." She said. "My stupid brothers are still at it keep picking on me."

"Figures." Cresselia said. "Do they ever stop fighting."

"Not that I know of." Giratina said. "Palkia and Dialga can be a real pain sometimes."

That's what siblings are for.

A portal devoid of cake opened and the two of them stepped out of it.

"I told you I am right." Palkia said.
"No your wrong." Dialga said.
"Just shut up." Palkia said.
"No you shut up." Dialga said.
"Make me!' Palkia yelled.

They've been here 5 seconds and already I hate them...

"You asked for it." Dialga said getting ready to attack “...but didn't expect to get blocked by Shaq...”?.

"How about both of you shut up before I take both of you out."

Someone thinks he's tough...

A white lion like Pokemon with a long neck, and a yellow ring around the middle of its body said stepping into the room. At that point everyone but Aurora kneeled down.

"Who are you?" She asked while trying to be as disrespectful as possible.
"I am Arceus god of Pokemon." He said.

Not impressed.

"Oh I am sorry I did not know, then allow me to..." She said kneeling flipping him off.

"Think nothing of it, bitch." He said. "Palkia and Dialga I don't want to hear one more word out of either of you, got it."
"Yes sir." They said.

Arceus attacked them anyway as a blatant display of his power, pummeling them so they'd shut the hell up.

"Ryan good to see you I thought I told you never to come here again." Arceus said.

"It's good to be back here." Ryan said. "For more reasons then one."

"Yes I know why This is my turf, asshole, watch your step." He said with a grin. "It have been a couple years since one of us fell in love with a human."

I guess it “have been” a while since we had a poorly written statement too.

"Hey as long as it don't bother her it don't bother me." Ryan said giving Latias a kiss.

Ever think about who it DOES bother? Primarily any sane person with the power to kick your ass?

"I have no problems with it." She said smiling at him.

Stay out of this!

"I was thinking we could go back to the shore." Ryan said. "It was where we first met."

"We could relive the old memories," She said. "and make some new ones."

***PCDE ALERT!*** Potentially Creepy Dialogue Exchange in progress!

"Sounds like a plan to me." Ryan said.

"Before you go I have a gift for you." Arceus said holding out a golden sword sheath in his paw.

Where did he store that on the way here?

"What is it?" Ryan asked drawing the blade.

Our hero, folks. Doesn't know what a sword is when it's not made of meat.

The blade seamed to glow with an inner power. It was golden and shaped like a lighting bolt. He then saw that it was battery-powered and made of plastic.

"It is a blade I crafted and blessed." He said "It has a small amount of my own power in it. Use it well."

I just hope he lops a limb off when showing off with it.

"Thank you." He said attaching the toy blade to his side. "I will wear it proudly."

What a moron!

Well looks like more Pokemon just got there there is still a few left.

Have you ever thought of using commas?

[Shockwave S08]

disclaimer: I don't own pokemon. I only own my OCs

Ch 9: Old memories

Ryan and Latias left the group and headed as far south in the city as you could go to a lake.

"This place sure brings back memories." Ryan said. "We first met in the under water cave a little ways west of here."

"Before that I was eyeing you in the councal room reamber." She said with a grin.

What.

Flashback

NOT THIS SHIT AGAIN.

"Cronos tech is getting stronger and smarter." Arceus said. "But they don't know about our secret trick-play this place."

"My god why do you have to talk so much." Ryan though sitting leaning aginst a wall in the meeting room. "Oh great I made a pun..."

"Why am I so attracted to Ryan, I mean he is a human." Latias though to herself stareing at him.

Listen, it was bad enough with what you and Ash Ketchum did in Pokemon Heroes, we don’t need more of that shit here!

"Thats funny." Ryan said to himself. "Latias is eyeing me. I wonder why."

If she’s making a slashing motion against her throat, and it’s directed at you, I think you damn well know why…

Ryan looked over toward Latias and nodded his head. Latias turned as red with rage as her wings and turned away.

"He saw me!" she though. "Maybe this is a good bad thing."

"That was strange." Ryan though to himself . "Maybe she has a plan to crush on me with a half-ton weight. Once this is over I will go talk to her."

Arceus ended the meeting and Ryan went over to see Latias but found she was gone.

"That was strange." He though. "Oh well."

"He wanted to talk to me." She though. "Good thing I can turn invieable.

That misspelling of that word is not invisible to us fanfiction mockers, thankyouverymuch.

I need a good way to relax and think. Thats it I will go to hot water lake."

Ryan headed out the lake at the south side of town. He stripped off his clothes and went for a swim.

You know you can get arrested for indecent exposure, right?

"Wow this lake must be connected to a volcano or something this is more like a hot spring." He said as he heard a noise of a gun being loaded. "What was that?"

Ryan swam over to a rock and found a small hole leading to a cave. Inside he saw SPARTAN-S08. But unfortunately for Ryan, S08’s motion sensor detected him once he got within range. The Spartan noticed this and threw a Spike Grenade into the water. You don’t need me to figure out what happens next… THIS STORY IS PINCUSHION END. Latias. He saw the entrence was under water.

"I need to think of a way to talk to him." Latias said to herself "But how?"

Leave him cryptic clues that lead him on a five-continent search for the answer.

"Hi Latias." Ryan said comming out of the under water entrence.

Latias'a face immedently turned red.

Warning: Awkward Levels at 75%!

"H-h-h-h-hi." She stuttered.

"Care if I join you?" Ryan asked.

She just nodded her head.

"Thanks." He said swimming next to her. "So what are you doing here?"

"Just trying to think. Plotting your downfall." Latias said still very red.

"About how to talk to kill me?" Ryan asked with a smile.

"How did you know?" she asked turning even reder.

"The way you were looking at me today told me all I needed to know." Ryan said. "I can tell you like hate me."

"You probly think I am some sorta creep now." She said putting her head down.

"Now why would I think that? I’m the one who’s supposed to be the creep here, not you." Ryan asked.

"I am a pokemon and your a human," She said "It just would not be right."

Every A.F.T.E.R. member’s thoughts exactly.

"It don't bother me any." Ryan said.

Your opinions matter nothing to us, Gary-Stu.

"Why?" She asked. "It seams so wrong."

Then ask your grandma to sew it together!

"Look at it this way," Ryan said "Love is the ultimat bond right."

"Yea." She said.

"Well then that means that love between a pokemon and a human is the ultimte bond between human and pokemon." Ryan said.

"Thats why I don't see anything wrong with it."

You realize you just signed your own death warrant, right?

"That does make since..." She said "I still don't know."

"If it bothers you that much then why don't you go to Hell got talk to Arceus before we go any farther." Ryan said "He Satan might be able to tell you what to do next."

"How do you know he won't get mad." She said.

He’s always looking for souls to fill Hell with.

"Trust me he won't." Ryan said. "Your not the first to fall in love with a human."

"Who else?" She asked.

"Shaymin." Ryan said. "She and my friend Slade are in love. Been together over a year now."

And are we…supposed to care about this?

"Maybe I should talk to her about this as well then." She said becomming more relaxed around Ryan.

"It would be a good bad idea." Ryan said.

"Thanks for the help." She said giveing him a kiss and taking off before he could say anything.

"Wow, this is going to be one hell of a month." Ryan said getting out of the water and laying an egg on the ground.

End Flashback.

"I still remeaber that day." Ryan said.

I’m guessing you didn’t remember to proofread your shit before you posted it?

"It happened exactly one year ago today."

"Let's go to the cave." Latias said diving into the water and looking at Ryan with her big golden eyes.

"Sure why not." Ryan said stripping off his clothes and jumping in.

Warning: Awkward Levels at 99.9%!

If anyone has any pokemon or pokemon OCs that they want in my story just let me know.

If this chapter were a rollercoaster, here is how it would end...


This post has been edited by Shockwave S08: Oct 24 2012, 04:35 PM

[Shockwave S08]

disclaimer: I don't own Pokemon. I only own my OCs

The next few chapters are going to be flashbacks of their past together.

Ch 10: The hidden cave

Ryan and Latias swam to the entrance of the cave and was about to head inside. Little did they know that Shaymin was inside already plotting their demise with a friend. She was in her Pokemon form. She was a small hedgehog like creature with green grass-like quills and a pink flower on each side of her head.

"So Shaymin how have things been?" A Pachirisu asked.

"OK." She said sitting above the water. "Now that you’re around again things are perfect."

Fixed that for you.

Just then Ryan and Latias came out of the water in the entrance. They scared the Pachirisu so badly that he let out a Shock that knocked out killed Ryan.

"Oh no Ryan!" Latias said holding him above the water.

"I am so sorry!" the Pachirisu said.

"Looks he's not waking up." Shaymin said.

"Did anyone get the number of that short bus." Ryan said shaking his head.

"You OK?" Shaymin asked.

"Yea. No." Ryan said. "That was one hell of a shock."

"Sorry." Pachirisu said. "I still cant control my power bowels that well."

"Slade is that you?" Ryan asked.

"Yep." He said.

"How did you become a Pokemon?" Ryan asked him. "You were human last time I saw you."

"I asked Arceus if he could change me." Slade said.

In response to that statement, Dr. Hax teleported in and dispensed his distinctive brand of “monitored justice” to everyone in the cave. THIS STORY IS FACE-CRUSHING END.

"Can you change back?" Ryan asked.

"Yes." He said.

"Wow." Ryan said. "Hey that means that if me and Latias want to have kids all we got to do is ask Arceus to use his powers of 1337 hax to turn me into a Latios."

"Yep." Slade said. "So what are you two doing here."

"Just checking out the old hangout. The smell sure has lingered after all this time." Ryan said. "This is where Latias and I first talked among other things."

"Wait is this cave where you two had sex?" Shaymin asked.

Would anyone in their right mind answer that question?

"Yep." Latias said. "In that small cave right over there."

That only serves to prove my point.

"I never knew that." She said.

"We were talking about some of the stuff that happened in the past." Ryan said.

"If you don't mind me asking what part were you guys at?" Shaymin.

It’s like the characters know they’re in a chaptered story or something…

"Right after we first met in here." He said.

"If you don't mind I would love to hear the story of how you two met." Slade said.

Ryan quickly filled Slade in on what had happen so far.

"I will pick up where we left off." Latias said.

Flashback FUCK!

"It's time I go and talk to Arceus about this." Latias said to nobody in particular heading to the temple.

"Latias it's good to see you." Arceus said .

"It's good to see you too." She said. "I have a question for you."

"What is it jailbait young one?" He asked.

"I am in love with Ryan but I am not too sure if it's right or not." She said turning bright red.

"If on other words your confused on weather or not it's right and you have come to ask me what I think." He said.

Today’s forecast calls for partly cloudy with a chance of POOR GRAMMAR.

"Yes." She said.

"Me personally I have no many problems with it." He said looking at her. "Your not the first to fall in love with a human at one time or another."

"Who all has?" She asked.

"Everyone but me." He said. "I never show myself to humans so very few know of me."

We can only assume he’s making this face while saying that…


"So it's OK with you then." She said.

"Like I said I have no problems with it. It’s not OK with God." He said smiling frowning at her.

"Thanks." She said and left.

She decided to go and talk to Shaymin next to see how to advance their relationship. She found here in a large dome building in the west side of town.

What did she find!? TELL US OR ELSE!!!

"Hey Shaymin." Latias said.

"Hello Latias." She said. "What brings you here?"

"I have some just one question and your the only one I really trust enough to ask." Latias said. "You will know more on this then anyone else here."

"Well what is it then my dear?" She asked .

"I am in love with Ryan." Latias said turning red with rage again. "I am not too sure just what I should do."

"Does he know you like hate him?" Shaymin asked.

"Yes." She said. "He talked to me at the water cave earlier where I proceeded to beat him into a bloody pulp."

"Did he say he liked you?" Shaymin asked.

"He didn't outright say it but in a way yes." She said "He said that I should talk to you and Arceus before we go any farther"

"You two are close to the same age right." Shaymin said

"I am 16 and he is too I think." She said "I am the youngest of all of us."

"I don't think you two will have any problems then, other than the legal system for being below the legal age of consent around these parts." Shaymin said smiling. "Is there anything else you want to know?"

"Everything you can tell me." Latias said "Anything that you know I would like you to tell me."

"Well get uncomfortable and I will tell you all I know." Shaymin said "This is the first time anyone has ever asked me about this."

"Sorry..." Latias said lowering her head

"There is nothing everything to be sorry about." Shaymin said. "Your young, you don't know much in the way of these things. You don't have a mother to ask these things. So WHY DO YOU WASTE MY TIME!? From now on if you have any questions about this sorta thing don't hesitate to ask me."

"Thanks Shaymin." Latias said. "I knew I could count on you."

"Don't Start worrying about it." She said smiling. "Now lets begin."

End Flashback (thank God)

"So that's what happened." Ryan said "I did not know that, because I’m a clueless idiot."

"She had no mother figure to look up to so I just stepped up to the plate." Shaymin said. "I struck out on three consecutive pitches. I am the oldest of all the females here so I guess it was just natural for me."

Just then Latios's head stuck in from the hole in the room.

"Ryan hurry up and GTFO get to town." Latios said.

"Why?" He asked.

"’cause I hate staring at your face. Also, Mew came early." He said.

"She did!" Latias said. "Don't just stand there lets get out of this story while we still can go!"

"What's up with her?" Slade asked as she took off out of the cave.

"She and Mew are like sisters born out of an incestuous relationship." Ryan said.

"Oh." Slade said. "Well lets go."

Well looks like Mew showed up earlier then expected, and she looks PISSED who knows whats going to happen now. If I got Latias's age wrong I am sorry I don't know it so I change it to fit the story.

Her age is not mentioned in ANY Pokemon media, so why make her below the legal age of consent?

[Shockwave S08]

disclaimer: I don't own Pokemon. I only own my OCs

Ch 11: Mew comes to town

Ryan and the others made it to town in about five dancing minuets after Ryan got dressed. When they got to town Mew was talking to Giratina when she saw Ryan.

Last I recall, most legendary Pokemon have no set gender, the only exceptions to this rule are Latias and Latios.

"Ryan!" She said flying over to him.

"Hey mew." He said hugging her disinterestedly. "How have you been."

"You know same old same old." She said. "Why of all days did you have to show up? does this stupid meeting have to be tomorrow. It's my birthday."

"Speaking of birthday here you go." He said pulling out a small box.

"Thanks" she said opening it.

Inside was a light pink Opal about one inch wide and three long.

"Oh its beautiful. …the fuck is this!?" She said.

"Took me a week to find in the Oreburgh mine." Ryan said.

"Thanks for nothing so much." She said punching him in the balls hugging him again.

"If only she knew how much that hurt." Ryan though. "If she hates likes this one wait till she gets the real present tomorrow."

"I got to go and get some rest." Mew said yawning "See you all tomorrow."

"Bye, bitch." Ryan said

"OK we need to make a plan for tomorrow." Giratina said. "Mew thinks this is just another Poke-orgy meeting."

"I know where Mew is staying tonight." Latias said. "In the morning after we get everything ready Ryan SPARTAN-S08 can go get destroy her."

"Works for me." Ryan said.

"We all better get some rest. And after that happens, YOU’RE NEXT!" Latias said. "Bye."

"Bye my love whore see you tomorrow." Ryan said.

Everyone left for their respected homes for the night. Tomorrow would bring one of the best party mass-orgies they had ever been to.

If that opal was not Ryan's real gift I wonder what is.

Sorry for the short chapter. The next one will be shittier better.

This post has been edited by Shockwave S08: May 9 2012, 01:35 PM

[SM2142]

disclaimer: I don't own Pokemon. I only own my OCs
WARNING! There is a Lemon between Ryan and Latias in this chapter. You have been warned.

Don't worry folks, I'm better equipped to handle these kinds of chapters than S-08. I'll bite the bullet and do this one all while hoping to maintain my sanity.

Ch 12: Sweet and sour memories sauce.

When Ryan got to his building everyone was already asleep because no one had to stand watch. He changed and then went to his room to go to bed. He was about to fall sleep when he heard a voice in his head.

It said, “Hi Billy Mays here!”

"Ryan you awake?" the voice asked.

"That you Latias? I'm trying to sleep!" Ryan though.

"Yea." she said. "I can't get this one memory out of my head."

"Which one is that?" He asked.

The really disturbing one when Ryan got high that one night and ran down the street naked saying that leprechauns stole his clothes?

"You should know." She said. "It was the night before you had to leave."

Oh wait, you mean the one when Ryan tried sticking his tongue into an electrical socket?

"Oh that memory." He said. "The night we had sex."

Well that was brutally honest of him...

"Yep." She said rolling her eyes.

Flashback

Aw shit, go to alert stage red, folks, this could get ugly.

Ryan and Latias were sitting in the cave relaxing. Tonight would be their last night together until the next meeting.
"Well this is it." Latias said. "After tonight we won't see each other for about six months centuries."

"Yea I know." Ryan said. "I would let you come with me but I don't want to risk you getting captured by Cronos or discover my many other poke-lovers all over the world."

"I know Wait, WHAT?" She said a tear in her eye. "I just wish there was some way."

"One day after I take down Cronos tech in football we can be together." Ryan said. "Until that day we have to be strong."

"I know." She said.

Latias went to kiss Ryan but when she did she did something different this time.

She strangled him?

When she kissed Ryan she slowly pushed her tongue into Ryan's mouth. Ryan started choking, unable to breathe.

"Sorry." She said breaking the kiss. "It was just something that popped into my head."

If S-08 were here, he'd probably shout, “How about a bullet pops into you head next?”

"Why are you sorry about it?" Ryan asked. "I don't have a problem with it."

But any sane person reading this DOES.

"It was something Shaymin told me." She said. "She said it was one way of showing how much you love someone apart from allergen-filled flowers."

"I know that." Ryan said taking her in his arms.

Attention, readers! We are entering hostile territory!

Ryan kissed her as he did their tongues intertwined and when they broke the kiss they looked deeply into each others eyes.

"Can you do something for me?" She asked him.

"Anything" Ryan said.

"Will you have sex with me? Hold still while I kill you!" she asked.

Her asking him this was a bit of a shock at first.

"If you want me to I will." He said.

Latias smothered Ryan with a pillow. THE END.
OK, that didn't happen, but I wish it did.

"I won't make this easy for you." She said with grin. "You going to have to find my entrance first."

Gross...

"This should be fun." He said.

Now that's just WRONG!

Ryan started kissing Latias's neck as his hand began rubbing her smooth underside searching for anything that might give her entrance away. As he reached her lower areas she gave a slight moan as he passed over a small flap in her skin.

Holy beastiality, Batman!

"What do we have here." He said rubbing the spot more,causing Latias to moan louder.
The skin pulled back revealing her entrance hot, wet, and waiting for him.

Anyone getting queezy should get their sickness bags NOW.

"Looks like you win." She said seducingly. "Now claim your prize."

It's a BRAND NEW CAAAAAR!!!

"I will in time." He said as he rubber her lips. "I want you to have some fun first."

He's putting rubber on her lips? Is he afraid of kissing her now without protection?

Latias moaned quietly as Ryan rubbed her warm, wet lips. Then he slowly inserted two fingers into her. Ryan slowly began thrusting his fingers in and out of Latias's lips making her moan and arch her back, her breath becoming heavy.

Like a dead body in an elevator, this is just wrong on so many levels!

He began picking up speed thrusting his fingers deeper into her. Then she let out a loud moan and came all over his hand and the cave floor. He brought his hand up and licked it clean.

Oh sure, you'll put rubber on her lips to protect from infection, yet you'll lick up her juices without a second thought?

"That... was amazing..." Latias said panting as she rolled over onto her back inches above the floor.

Is she hovering now?

"It's not over yet." He said with a grin.

And anyone reading this cried out in horror, “NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!”

Ryan lowered his head to her entrance and began to lick her lips clean. This caused Latias to start moaning even louder then before.

"Please...don't...stop" She said between breaths.

Ryan started thrusting his tongue into her making her shiver with pleasure. He made sure to get every drop of her sweet juices that he could find.

Now this is just getting sick...

"Ryan...I am going to...murder you while you sleep!" Was all she could say before a jolt of pure rage pleasure shot through her body as she came into Ryan's mouth. Ryan swallowed all of the sweet juice and then sat up looking at Latias.

Is it over yet?

"My turn." She said pushing Ryan onto his back.

Latias looked at Ryan's erect member and began to lick it's tip. Then she wrapped her tongue around it and took most of the length inside her mouth causing Ryan to let out a moan.

I hope she gets hungry and starts literally eating him...just not like this!

She began to move her head up and down picking up speed as she went. She used her tongue to lick the tip as her head bobbed up and down causing Ryan to moan even more. Ryan moaned loudly as he released his seed into her mouth. She held it there for several seconds savoring its taste before swallowing it. Then licked the tip of his member clean.

Not a week later, Ryan got some bad news in the form of this song.

"My god Latias..."Ryan said. "Where did you learn that?"

"Shaymin told me a couple things From all that sick porn you keep in your backpack." She said licking her lips clean.

"Ready to go all the way?" He asked her.

Shit, he's serious...

"You know it." She said laying on her back letting Ryan approach.
Just then they heard something.

It was an angry mob who wanted the scene to end.

"Latias!" a voice yelled. "Where are you?"

"Oh great it's my brother." she said.

"He has the worst timing." Ryan said stepping away from her.

Oh thank goodness for cock-blocking!

"Shaymin was supposed to keep him away from here tonight." She said rolling over on her belly. "Guess that ends this."

I now want to shake her brother's hand for saving us all!

"I think this will hold you off till we meet can do this again." Ryan said putting his arm around her.

"Yea." She said. "I better go."

"Will you be there to see my off tomorrow?" Ryan asked.

"Yes HELL NO!." She said.

End flashback

"We still never picked up where we left off." Ryan said.

Lucky for us!

"I know." Latias said. "We could have tonight but Shaymin and Slade was there."

Verb tense set to scramble!

"That always seams to be our luck." Ryan said.

Again with the sewing and weaving...

"There is always tomorrow." she said.

"Or..." Ryan said.

"Or what?" She asked.

"Well I was thinking that now that I have a way to neutralize the snag machines Cronos uses," Ryan said. "I could catch you real quick then you can come with me without being able to be taken from me very easily."

Or maybe you should just let Spartan S-08 catch you instead!

"So I can come with you on your quest now?" She asked.

"Yep Ha! Psyche!" Ryan said.

"Thank god!" She said. "The sooner we die the better."

"I will talk to Arceus about it tomorrow." He said. "For now get some sleep."

Latios messed up their whole moment. Talk about bad timing. Well at least they were able to have a little fun. This is my first lemon, please let me know if there is anything I need to do to make my next one better.

How about I shove an Aperture Science Combustible Lemon up your ass? Man, that was awkward to read. Not the worst stuff I've read, but still disturbing.

[Shockwave S08]

disclaimer: I don't own Pokemon. I only own my OCs

Ch 13: Talking to Arceus and Ryan being Dicks to Each Other

Ryan woke up a little after Dawn to find Aurora, Mew, Shaymin, and Latias entering his room.

Wait, when did Dawn get here? Isn’t she straying a little too far from Ash’s side?

"Hello ladies." Ryan said. "What are you doing here this early?"

"We were coming to wake you up kill you." Latias said. "You have to talk to Arceus about me you coming inside me with you remember."

"That's right." He said getting up. "Are all of the members for the council here yet?"

Assuming it’s the Citadel Council, they’re good-for-nothing boardroom idiots.

"That arrived earlier this morning." Shaymin said.

"Excellent." Ryan said getting a clean filthy pair of shorts and a cum-stained shirt and heading to the other room.

"I can't wait be start traveling." Latias said doing a line of coke loop.

"It's a fun thing to do." Shaymin said.

"This is another one hundred half-years I am alive." Mew said. "I get a wish today."

"Yep." Ryan said coming out of the room. "Well lets go talk to Arceus."

The group headed to the temple while Aurora stayed in the building getting ready for the party. When they got to the temple they found Arceus sitting outside pondering on whether or not to kill Ryan.

"Hello Arceus." Ryan said kneeling down.

"Hello Ryan." he said.

"Where is something that I need to ask of you." Ryan said in a dyslexic stupor.

"What is it? " he asked.

"Would it be OK if Latias traveled with me?" Ryan asked.

"I am afraid she can't Fuck NO!'" Arceus said.

"What why?" Latias said.

"She would be too easy of a target. ‘cause you’re just a sack of old sacks." He said.

"I am stronger and can protect her." Ryan said.

"I said no." He said.

"Why do you have to do this to me!" Latias cried and took off.

Funny thing is, never had that problem with Mari’Tasi vas Nedas, but that story is already in the Off-Topic subforum…

"Latias wait!" Shaymin yelled following her.

Ryan SPARTAN-S08 looked at everyone present Arceus with pure hate. He then whipped out his Badass Rifle and went to town on their asses. THIS STORY IS BADASS END.

"Now look at what you have done!" Ryan yelled taking off the sword he gave him and throwing in on the ground. "Take your fucking sword back I don't want it. I preferred much meatier swords anyway…"

"Don't you dare turn your back on me!" Arceus Boomed.

"I just did." Ryan said and left to go find Latias.

Arceus then smote Ryan with his Hyper Beam. THIS STORY IS WHITE-OUT END.

"What is the matter with everyone today?" he said.

"Whats the matter!" Mew yelled. "You just crushed Latias's dream that what! Ever since they first met she has dreamed of traveling with him and I don't care how but I am going to find a way she can do it!" *insert pointless bitching here*

"Why should you care about her." Arceus said.

"Because me and her are like sisters!" She said. "I want her to be happy. Look at all of the things Ryan has done for all of us, he has even saved your hide once. Now when he asks one thing of you, you shoot him down. You know they are in love. You truly have a cold heart I hope you know that." *more meaningless bickering*

With that Mew teleported away.

Arceus The author is a real ass...

Sorry for the short chapter again. There was really not much I could add to this.

Surely you can’t beat BioWare at their own chapter-ending game? Even they could outperform you, and that’s not saying much for either party!

[SM2142]

disclaimer: I don't own Pokemon. I only own my Ocs

Ch 14: Mew's promise to KILL THEM ALL!

Ryan knew that Latias was going to the sea cave. Along the way he met up with Entei.

"Hi Ryan." He said. "You know what's wrong with Latias? She keeps muttering about how she's going to end you"

Ryan quickly told him what happened.

"Now I see why she is so upset. But why did you try to fuck her?" He said.

"I got to go." Ryan said. "If anyone asks tell them what I told you."

"I understand You are truly a sick and deranged person." He said as Ryan took off.

When he got to shore he did not bother taking off his clothes he jumped in and took off to the cave at a brisk dog-paddle pace. When he got in he found Latias was with Shaymin crying in the back of the cave. When she saw him she flew to him and cried sank a knife into his chest.

THE END!
Ryan restarted from checkpoint...

"It's OK I got you." Ryan said rubbing her back.

"It's not fair!" She cried. "I know you can't protect me!"

"I do too." Ryan said. "But Arceus don't think I can."

He got his on-again off-again southern accent.

"I just don't know what to do." She said looking into Ryan's eyes.

RED Heavy entered the cave, “Keep crying, baby!”

"Don't worry my love." Ryan said kissing her. "We will think of something."

Just then Mew teleported in.

"You two alright What's all the damn noise?" She asked.

"Not really." Latias said tears still rolling from her eyes.

"I am not sorry little sister for what happened earlier." She said.

"You have nothing to be sorry about You BITCH! I'll rip you limb from limb!" Latias said. "This is all Arceus's fault too."

"That's true." Mew said. "I am going to find a way to keep you two together apart even if I have to teleport the two of you back and forth on opposite ends of the planet."

"Mew I don't want you to get in trouble." Ryan said still holding Latias.

"I don't care what Arceus has to say about it, and I don't care about you either, Ryan." Mew said.

"Thank Fuck you Mew." Latias said.

"Don't worry about it." Mew said smiling. "As much as you don't want to see him we better get to the meeting hall. All this stupid drama is making my skin crawl."

"I guess your right." Latias said

The four of them headed out.

Lets hope Mew can think of something to help the two of them.

The only thing that could “help” would be to cut this fic short and just leave it to die.

[Shockwave S08]

disclaimer: I don't own Pokemon. I only own my OrCs

Ch 15: The Nazi party starts

Ryan and the others headed to the meeting hall to start the party on the way they stopped at Ryan's place so he could pick up another sword made of sausage links. They got to the meeting hall and headed inside It was black as the night inside.

What is this mysterious “It” that you speak of?

"What's going on?" Mew asked.

"Just wait. Your death." Ryan said and tapped hit foot on the ground.

When he did a light came on showing the DJ booth with Azelf sitting inside with a pair of sunglasses on his head. He looked at Ryan as if waiting for a signal. Ryan nodded his head and Azelf smiled and pulled the sunglasses over his eyes without making a witty one-liner. He then search a box behind him for a record, through it up into the air, turned back the the turn tables, caught the disk then put it on the turn table, and set the needle on it.

Something tells me this Azelf guy is trying way too hard to impress us. Because he isn't.

An upbeat techno music started to play.

*insert obligatory annoying hi-hat half-beat here*

Azelf flipped a switch and the lights started up dancing around to the confusing beat of the music. Then everyone came out of their hiding spots with a grin on their face.

Happy birthday death-day Mew!" they all yelled as they pulled out their MP40s and gunned her down. THE END.

"Come on Mew you really think we were going to forget this." Ryan said in a monotone voice.

"You guys planned all this for me!" She said to them all. "Thanks everyone! I FUCKING HATE TECHNO!!!"

Mew took off into the crowd to beat them up while Ryan and the others just listened inserted their earplugs to drown out the awful music. Just then Arceus walked over to them.

"What do you want." Ryan said to him.

"I wanted to apologize for earlier." He said.

"Can Latias travel with me then." Ryan said like an annoying 8-year-old.

"No she can't." He said.

"Then you can take your apologies and shove it." Ryan said.

"Do you know why I won't let her go? Them's fightin' words, boy!" Arceus asked taunted him.

"You think I am too weak to protect her." Ryan said.

I think that pretty much sums it up right there...

"Not weak you just don't have the skills to survive in everyday life." He said.

"So you will let me attack a Cronos base by my self but you won't let Latias travel with me." Ryan said. "That's twisted."

Is that like a bad 90's slang-term or something?

"If she is with you you will be attacked more often." He said.

“Your aggro meter will rise in her presence.” He added.

"From what I can tell the only way I could take he with me would be to kill you."Ryan said before initiating a Renegade Interrupt.

"You can't kil-" Arceus started to say but was cut off when the tip of Ryan's blade touched his throat.

"I can kill you." Ryan said removing his blade. "I won't though. This is only made of meat. To think after saving your sorry hide from Cronos I though I proved myself insignificant to you."

Ryan and Latias left a very stunned Arceus to think about what he said.

"Are you sure that was such a good idea?" Latias asked him.

"I don't know. I didn't put much thought into it, did I? and I don't care." Ryan said. "After all I've done for him and he does this to me I should have killed him." He continued, gaining even more Renegade points.

"Bu you know if you did it would throw the world out of whack." Latias said.

Does this fic really need to be thrown more out of whack? It's plenty idiotic enough as is.

"Yea I know." Ryan said "Maybe he will come to his senses sooner or later."

If he doesn't, then this fic is sure as hell done and over with!

Ryan and Latias were walking around when they saw Darkria and Cresselia but there was someone else with them it looked like a small Darkria but it had rings like Cresselia.

"Hello you two." Ryan said walking up.

"Hello Ryan." Cresselia said with a smile. "This is our daughter hideous abomination Vespera."

"A pleasure to meet you. Damn, you're ugly!" Ryan said bowing.

"Likewise." Vespera said.

"When did this happen?" Ryan asked.

"A little over ten years 0.5 seconds ago." Darkria said.

"Wow I never knew you two were in love." Ryan said

"We were we just never told anyone." Darkria said.

They knew what would happen if they said anything. They're the smart ones here, not you, Ryan.

"Unlike you two." Vespera said. "That is true right?"

"Yep." Ryan said. "Been together a year now."

"That's cool boring." Vespera said

"How are things going with Arceus?" Cresselia asked.

"He won't let her travel with me." Ryan said. "He says I don't have the skills to do anything protect her."

"That's bull quite the accurate statement." Darkria said.

"You telling me." Ryan said, oblivous to Darkrai's remark.

"We will think of something." Latias said.

Something is going to give sooner or later, or will it be a third party that solves this problem.

My money's on this third party being SPARTAN-S08.

Vespera is owned by I Am SomeoneI Am No One.

WARNING: Contradictory statement detected.

[SM2142]

disclaimer: I don't own Pokemon. I only own my Ocs

Ch 16: Mew's wish for Ragnarok

The party was going perfect when until Arceus decided it was time for Mew to make her wish.

"Everyone, shut the hell up." He boomed . "It is time for Mew to make her wish."

The music stopped and everyone was quiet as she flew over to him.

"As you know Mew every one hundred years you get a wish for whatever you want that is within my power." Arceus said.

There's always a catch!

"I know this, but you keep bringing it up EVERY hundred years." She said.

Mew was thinking about what she wanted when an idea hit her like a ton of bricks.

Spartan S-08 had rigged a load of bricks above the party floor and let them fall, crushing Mew beneath them.

"I can wish for anything correct." Mew said.

Rather than something incorrect?

"As long as it's within my power yes." Arceus said with a troll face.

"I know exactly what I want then." Mew said turning to Ryan and Latias.

"What is it?" Arceus asked her.

"I wish you would let Latias travel with kill Ryan." She said.

OK so maybe that didn't happen but it would have saved us a lot time!

"Mew you don't have to do this." Latias said sarcastically.

"It's fine," Mew said. "As long as your happy I am happy."

Your English teacher must be so proud of you, author...

"Is this truly what you want?" Arceus asked her.

"Yes On second thought, no, I wish for the ability to make infinite wishes." Mew said.

"Very well then." He said "Latias from this day forth if you so wish it you may travel with Ryan."

I hope this wish backfires on these two VERY soon.

Latias flew right into Ryan's arms.

"Ryan did you hear him!" She said tears of joy flowing from her eyes.

"I did my love now we can be together No shit, I was right here the whole time.." Ryan said

"There is one other thing." Arceus said walking over to them.

"What?" Ryan asked.

"I would like to not apologize for my actions over the past couple of days. I hate your guts, Ryan, and I hope you die a slow death." He said bowing.

Ryan nearly fell over when the god of the Pokemon bowed before him. He had the blessed sword resting in the ring around his body.

So I guess he didn't pay attention to what he said?

"I have been thinking about what you said and have decided the I made my decisions too quickly." He said. "For that I am truly sorry I still think this is a mistake and I know I'm right."

"I don't accept you apology." Ryan said taking refusing the blessed sword and putting in on his belt instead favoring his own sword made of meat..

"As do I." Latias said.

"Thank Fuck you." Arceus said.

"Mew I have one other gift for you." Ryan said pulling out a box from his back pocket. "Close your eyes."

After Mew closed her eyes Ryan opened the box and pulled out a large pink opal punched Mew in the face. The opal had small veins of light blue going through it. Ryan put it in her hand.

"You can open your eyes now." Ryan said.

As soon as Mew saw the gem her jaw dropped for a mile because it was broken.

"Is this what I think it is?" She asked him.

"A neon opal." Ryan said. "It took me over two months to find that thing."

Mew was speechless.

"This was the last one I needed to finish the necklace I am making What the hell were you thinking?" Mew said hugging kicking Ryan in the junk. "Thank you some much That's for punching me."

"It's no problem." Ryan said. "I already got something planned for your next birthday Latias."

"Its in a couple months." She said.

Mew got all of her gifts from the others and then Ryan spoke up.

"Well everyone that's all of the gifts but we all know mine was the best." Ryan said. "There is only one thing left to do now."

"Whats that?" Mew asked.

"DJ turn that music up Let's spin 'dis shit!" Ryan said

"You got it." Azelf said.

The party really took off after everything that had just happened. The party did not end until early the next morning after the drunken death matches. The last ones to leave alive were Azelf, Ryan, Mew and Latias.

"I never knew you played at a night club." Ryan said to Azelf. "You are really good."

"Thanks." Azelf said. "Next time your around lake Valor hit the Blue Moon nightclub. Just tell them Jack sent you but techno's easy to do and requires next to no skill."

"I don't know about you but I am half dead." Mew said yawning.

"What happened to your unlimited energy?" Ryan asked jokily then yawning.

"Look whose talking Stop talking about consistency." Mew said.

"You got a point." Ryan said. "I am going to bed."

"Care if I stay with you tonight?" Latias asked.

Uh oh, I was hoping to not read that.

"Do you really think you have to ask that." Ryan said. "Of course you can't. This way we can set off in the morning."

"See all of you later." Mew said heading to her place.

"Bye." Azelf said heading to the east side of town.

"Well off to bed." Ryan said as he and Latias headed to his place.

Next chapter might be a bit intense for S-08...

Well looks like Mew kept her promise to Latias after all. She said she would find a way and she did.

What good are promises? Don't you know that promises are only made to be broken?

[Shockwave S08]

disclaimer: I don't own Pokemon. I only own my OCs

Ch 17: An old enemy

Ryan and rest of the group started off with their newest member Latias floating happily along with them. When ever they went into a town Latias would turn into her human leper form so no one would notice who she really was. They were traveling through the Eterna forest on their way to Floaroma town when a large car- M808B Scorpion tank came crashing through the trees toward them.

"What in the hell!" Ryan said.

The tank stopped and on the front of it was a large strange J.

"Well look what we have here." A man said stepping out of the thing secondary turret. "Hand over the Latias before you get hurt."

Is Latias made of gold or something? What makes her so valuable in the enemy's eyes?

"Why don't go take a long walk of a short pier." Ryan said drawing the blade Arceus gave him.

"Give it to me now before I take it from you. I have no idea what you're talking about, honestly!" He said.

"Your not Cronos who are you?" Ryan asked him.

"That's it." The guy said pulling out a pokeball.

"Let it out and I cut you in half." Ryan said swinging the blade toward the guy.

When he swung the blade a bolt of lighting shot out of the tip and cut the tank in half.

In response, the pilot leaped out of the driver's seat. Turns out it was SPARTAN-S08 this whole time, who proceeded to kill Ryan once again. THE END.

Loading checkpoint...done!

"Wow I did not know it (me-ti-doughty) sausage did that." Ryan said walking over to the guy. "Now who do you work for."

"Pokemon hunter J." The guy said.

At that point Ryan's face turned red with anger.

"Oh no this is not good." Aqua said.

"Why?" Aurora asked.

"Pokemon Hunter J took a Vulpix testicle from Ryan a couple years ago." She said.

"You got three seconds to tell me how to contact her!" Ryan said to the guy.

"Radio in the tank." He said as slowly as possible. Unfortunately, Ryan killed him before he could finish.

Ryan search the tank's remains and found the radio.

"Hunter H J you better pick this up right now!" Ryan yelled into it.

Fixed that for you, you selfish prick.

"Who the hell are you." A voice said over it.

"The one you stole a testicle from two years ago!" Ryan said. "I am coming to get my Vulpix virginity back."

"The buyer never did come to get it." She said. "If you want it I will trade the Latias you have with you for it."

"How about you give him it back and I don't cut you in half bludgeon you to death with my manly meat." Ryan said.

"Good luck finding me." J said.

"Oh I will find you and when I do you dead." Ryan said and crushed the radio Scouter while shouting “IT'S OVER 9000!!!”.

Ryan sat down on the ground and closed his eyes. When he opened them again they were glowing purple.

"Life search. Aimbot." He said.

What Ryan was seeing was every living thing withing a three mile area around him. He found a large square shape with many human life forces in it.

Little did he know that Dr. Hax had snuck up behind him while he was abusing game mechanics. He then disposed of Ryan the only way he knows how: You guessed it, a monitor to the face. THE END.

Loading checkpoint...done!

"I found her ship." Ryan said getting up. "Lets go get burner my virginity back."

That is one heck of a blade blunt instrument. I wonder what else it can do.

Your mom!

I almost feel sorry for J when Ryan finds her.

I hope she kills him in the most violent way possible when they do meet...

This post has been edited by Shockwave S08: May 9 2012, 01:56 PM

[SM2142]

disclaimer: I don't own Pokemon. I only own my Orcs

Ch 18: Battle at the flying fortress

Ryan and the others were making their way to J's ship.

"Everyone I want you to put these on." Ryan said holding several necklaces. "They will protect you from snag machines and J's prison blaster."

Little did they know they were just shark teeth on strings. Ryan has quite the imagination.

Everyone put them on, mean while back at J's ship she was trying to figure out what to do with all the beer cans cluttering up the cockpit.

"If that kid comes here it will make it easier for me to get his Pokemon." She said to herself.

Well, DUH! If he's not physically there how the hell do you intend to take anything that he has with him?

"I don't think he will stand much of a chance with all of these troops here."

Just then an explosion rocked the ship.

"What the hell!" She said. "Status report. How many redshirts did we lose?"

"Our main engines are off line." One of the people said. "Our power core if failing as well Someone left a potato in the microwave!"

"Activate back-up power and engines and get us the hell out of here." J said.

"At once But we're using the backup engines as moonshine stills!" He said typing something on a keyboard.

As they started to lift off a second explosion hit the ship sending it to the ground.

"Sir all engines offline." He said. "We have fifty percent power and dropping."

"Begin repairs I will deal with the pest. Stop tapping into the main power core to run your LAN parties!" J said.

Back outside Ryan and the others were watching the ship.

"Looks like it's disabled." Ryan said

Did you come to that riveting conclusion all by yourself?

Just than a Hyper beam landed mear feet from him.

"You have caused me enough trouble." J said flying down on her Salamance.

"Where is Burner!" Ryan yelled. Somehow forgetting to ask the question.

"Like I said you can have him for the Latias." J said.

"How about you give him to be before I set you on fire with a-" Ryan was saying when the sausage blade turned red. "What in gods name!"

Ryan swung the blade and a blast of fire shot out.

Looks like his sword is a bit overdone.

"Oh hell yea." Ryan said. "Like I was saying you better give Burner before I burn you up."

Ryan sounds like a 9 year old on the playground.

At that time Ryan notice a control collar on Salamance's neck.

It's the new RC controlled Salamance! Now only $29.99!

"Your Latias is mine." She said shooting at her with her prison blaster.

Wow, firing a whole prison at a target? Can you say, “Overkill”?

The blast was pulled into the gem of the necklace around her neck.

It's just that easy? Too convenient!

"Nice try." Ryan said. "Your not going to get her that easy. Everyone defense formation seven around Salamance, get J off his back."

Attack pattern Delta! Fumble-Rooskie! Make it so!
See? I can make up strategies too!

"Oh no you don't." She said pulling out a pokeball. "Go Drapion!"

A large purple scorpion like Pokemon came out of the ball.

Any radscorpion would laugh at such a sight.

"Its a poison and dark type." Ryan though. "Solar use psychic hax."

Solar sent Drapion flying into the side of the ship knocking it out.

"Blast!" J said.

That's all you can say? Blast?

While J was not paying attention and neither was the audience, Aqua jumped onto Salamance's back and knocked J off. Before she could get up Ryan was over there with his sausage blade to her neck.

"You got three to call you Salamance off." Ryan said.

"Salamance stand down That doesn't make any sense, you idiot." J said. "So what are you going to do now?"

"First your going to tell me where Burner is." Ryan said.

Any English teacher now wants Ryan dead.

"Over my dead body burnt carcass." J said.

"That can be arranged." Ryan said as he moved the blade closer to her neck.

"That's just sausage, you moron! But it's at The central storage hold." J said.

"Pass code." Ryan said.

"44356 867-5309." J said.

"Ice." Ryan said and the blade turned ice blue. "Ice beam."

I call serious HAX on this one!

Ryan froze J's legs to the ground so she could not get away.

"I will be taking this, and your hat." Ryan said taking the prison blaster from her arm. "Everyone keep an eye on her. Latias, Aqua you two come with me into the woods where we can look for a power outlet.."

"Right." Aqua said as the three of them made their way into the ship.

With J out of the way Ryan now had to find Burner in the ship. This should be a lot of fun.

Because freeing a prisoner from a burning ship is always so much more fun than it is dangerous!

[Shockwave S08]

disclaimer: I don't own Pokemon. I only own my OCs
Ch 19: Lost is found

Ryan made his way through the ship even easily after finding out that the prison blaster works on humans who were crushed by the resultant rubble of firing an entire building at them. When he got to the storage room he put in the code and the door opened revealing many different Pokemon stuck inside glass domes frozen in the rock like substance.

Note to self: Sealing Pokemon in a rock-like coating does NOT seal in the freshness...

" OK you two we are looking for Burner he is a Vulpix with a blue fire mark on his head. Not that we can tell with the rock-stuff probably covering him." Ryan said reaching out with his mind. "Solar you there?"

"Yea what do you need? Can't I take a shit in peace!?" He asked.

"Send star to go get the cops." Ryan said. "Have her make sure they bring a lot of transports."

"OK I will tell her now." He said in an unconvincing tone.

Latias came flying over.

"Is this him your lost virginity?" She asked holding a glass dome with a Vulpix in it.

"Yep. Nope." Ryan said taking the dome from her and pushing the little slider down, even as his neck began to extend.

As Ryan pushed the slider down the rock that covered Burner came off.

"Burner I am her hurr to get you." Ryan said picking him up, his brain malfunctioning in the process.

"I WAS FROZEN TODAY! knew you would." Burner said. "How long has it been?"

"Two 9001 years." Ryan said sadly.

"It took you two over 9000 years to get me." Burner said, crushing a Scouter he got out of nowhere.

"It's not easy finding this ship." Ryan said putting him down.

“You know, except for the fact that it's BIGGER THAN MY FUCKING MANSION!”

"Lets get the rest of these Pokemon out of the stone."

The group started releasing the Pokemon and then telling them whats happening. The Pokemon the were taken from the wild were allowed to walk out and go back to their normal life attacking random people. The ones that were taken from trainers waited for Ryan and the others to finish then Ryan would eat them alive try and help them find their trainers. There was a Milotic that seamed to take a liking to him.

...no comment.

"Well looks like that's the last of the chili dogs." Ryan said belching and making his eyes glow purple again. "I Don't since any other pokmon life force."

"Good so now what?" Burner asked.

"We wait for the cops to show up to get J and her goons. Let's see how deep a shovel can go up my ass before something breaks." Ryan said. "Then we help everyone get their Pokemon's skeletal remains back."

"Is that what I think it is?" Burner asked looking at Latias SPARTAN-S08, who was observing the scene from ground level, planning his next move.

"Yes she is with me." Ryan said completely oblivious to the 7-foot-tall angry man waiting outside. "Were are mates so to speak."

"Wow a lot has happened in two years... Get the hell away from me, you sick freak." Burner said.

"More then you know." Ryan said as they headed out of the ship."Let's see what this RC Salamence can do. get the control collar of Salamance next."

Ryan walked up to he Salamance to see how it would react, it then split him in half with the Dragon Claw move it just stood there looking at him.

"I am going to take off the collar around your neck." Ryan said, his upper-half climbing onto his back and plugging his laptop into it. "This one looks harder then your Aurora."

"Can you get it?" Aurora asked him.

"Yea it will just take me some time." Ryan said typing on the keyboard.

About twenty millenia minuets passed before Ryan got access. In this time, the Imperium of Man was formed. A squad of Space Marines were then sent in to deal with Ryan and his cohorts. THE END.

"Bingo." Ryan said as the collar unlocked and fell to the ground. "How do you feel?"

"Like a new toothbrush I just woke up from a dream." The Salamance said shaking his neck

"I if since your J's you will be released into the wild." Ryan said, having another stroke in the process. "If you want you can come with me."

"Sure." He said.

In the distance Ryan could see Star with about a hundred Brute choppers following her, which, instead of helping out with the retrieval of the captive Pokemon and J, just simply decided to splatter everyone on the spot. THE END.

"Perfect." Ryan said as officer Jenny jumped out of the first chopper.

"Where is J?" She asked.

"Right after I, but before K over here." Ryan said taking her to J.

"You have done a great service catching her by freezing her to death." Jenny said as Ryan broke the Ice on J's feet everything.

"Hey she was trying to take my Latias." Ryan said.

"You have Latias with you Are you high?" Jenny asked

"Before you say anything she came with me by choice." Ryan said. "Just forget I said anything about her."

"Right." She said in an uneasy tone.

Latias walked up to Ryan in her human form so that no one else knew.

"So what are we going to do with all the remains of the Pokemon?" Ryan asked Jenny.

"Well we will take them to the Pokemon center and get them checked out identified." Jenny said pushing J into a chopper. "When we will try and find their trainers."

"OK I will go tell them whats going on." Ryan said. "By the way J's Salamance is coming with me."

"Fine with me."Jenny said. "Just keep him out of trouble."

Ryan went over with Latias walking next to him to the group of dead Pokemon.

"OK everyone this is whats going to happen." Ryan said to the piles of bones. "Your going to be taken to the Pokemon center to get check out then Officer Jenny, that's the woman with the blue hair, is going to try and find your trainers for you."

Two Pokemon survivors moved foreword, It was the female Milotic and a female growlithe.

"I don't have a trainer." The Milotic said.

"Nether do I." The growlithe said.

"Then your both free to go." Ryan said. "Unless you want me to dine on your flesh to come with me."

"You mean we can? Let's get out of here!" The Milotic said in a look of sheer terror asked happily.

"If you want to try escaping of course." Ryan said with an evil smile. I think you can figure out the rest. THIS STORY IS MEATY END.

After several hours of work eating all of J's men, and the Pokemon's remains were loaded up and taken away. Jenny told him to stay the fuck away from her the next time he was in a city to stop at the police station to pick up the bounty J had on her head. The group was made stronger by the addition of three new meals members growlithe, Milotic, and Salamance who seams to have a thing for Star.

J is history and the group is stronger this is a sin against the word “sin” perfect.

This post has been edited by Shockwave S08: May 9 2012, 02:01 PM

[Shockwave S08]

disclaimer: I don't own Pokemon. I only own my OCs
Ch 20: A strange request

Ryan had been traveling for about two days now. He had names his newest members already. Ryan named Milotic Misty Breakfast because of the small amount of mist that floated around her body to keep it moist. The Salamance was named Jack Lunch and the Growlithe was named Firelight Dinner. Burner and Eevee hit it off very quickly while Firelight took a liking to Flame. Jack and Star also seamed to get along very well.

This could possibly lead to an awkward triple-date...

Ryan noticed the Misty was talking to Latias a lot about something but what Ryan did not know. When they picked up (and subsequently set down) the night Latias had something she needed to talk to Ryan about.

It was about their obvious communication issues.

"Ryan I have something I need to ask of you." Latias said as they headed to his room to sleep. "Its about Misty."

"What's wrong with her?" Ryan asked.

"Well here is the thing you know that her mating season is coming up right. She thinks you're a disgraceful person and should eat shit and die." Latias said.

"Yea." Ryan said retardedly.

"Well she is fighting the urge to go into the deep oceans to mate to stay here with us." Latias said. "In the end this will cause her pain."

Emotional pain, I hope?

"How so?" Ryan asked.

"Well during the mating season different things drive females to find mates." Latias said. "For us dragon types it's pain. I know because the five days before we had sex that first time during the day shots of pain would shoot through me. That why I hid from you during the day. So you would not see me like I was. Once night came my body would stop hurting."

But we're here to prolong your suffering...with BULLETS.

"So your telling me that if she don't mate she will be in pain for a while." Ryan said.

"Yes." Latias said. "It's a curse we dragon types have to live with. After we mate our bodies since this and calm down and the pain stops. We did not fully have sex but what we did was enough to put my body back to normal. I am old enough to breed that's why I felt the pains.

No, you're not.

Her mating season lasts for one month and that's how long she will be in pain for."

"So we need to find her a mate then." Ryan said.

Any potential candidates should be hunted down. And killed.

"Its not that easy." Latias said. "All of the male Milotic are in the deep oceans waiting for breeding season to start."

"When does it start?" Ryan asked.

"Two weeks years from now." Latias said.

"Do you have any ideas?" Ryan asked her.

"I do but I am not sure what you will think of it." Latias said blushing.

"What?" Ryan asked her.

"You having sex with her." Latias said.

What.

"Are you alright with that?" Ryan asked her.

"If it helps keep her from being in pain I am fine with it." Latias said. "She asked me what Ithough about the idea. I was OK with it but she was too afraid to ask you so she asked me to instead."

"Well as long as your OK with it I will do it." Ryan said.

Something tells me they're gonna end up on this show before too long...


"I knew you would be." Latias said giving Ryan a kiss.

"I don't want her to be in any pain." Ryan said. "That's the worst thing for a trainer is to see their Pokemon in pain."

Then why the hell do you fight them constantly!?

"I know why do you think I hid from you." Latias said. "With what we had it would have been even worse."

"Are you sure your OK with it?" Ryan asked.

"Well I will won't be after we have some fun tonight." Latias said with a grin. "It has been over a year after all."

"It has." Ryan said taking her in his arms.

Just then they heard something and a man busted through the door of Ryan's room with something in his hands. It was Shaymin. She was covered in blood and had a dart in her back.

The clan tag on it had only three things: S. 0. 8.

"What in the hell!" Was all Ryan could say when he saw Shaymin.

Oh great what in the world happened to Shaymin!

Something good for a change?