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> MewStaria and the Crew: Beating the Toddler Titans, A group of retards beat up another group of retards
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post Dec 31 2016, 01:44 PM
Boy oh Boy did I have a great 2016! Because of this, I thought to myself, "Hmm, why not read one more fanfic for the year?" And what better way to conclude this year with a Teen Titans Go hate fic. I originally planned to do this one a lot earlier, but I put it on the back burner as I wanted to focus more of my time on Link's Queen's sue adventures in Hyrule. For now, I'm taking a break from that after all of the ridiculousness that story had to offer. Anyway, onto the fic...

(Meanwhile, Gumball is hanging out with Penny, Twilight, her friends and her student, Starlight Glimmer were at the Grand Galloping Gala, Darwin was by himself playing Yokai Watch on the 3DS, Star and Marco was in the cloud dimension partying, Jibanyan and Pinkipoo are resting, and Grizz, Panda and Icebear are playing Basketball outside when an alarm goes off. The characters rush into action and hide in the lair, which is disguised as a Pokémon Gym.)

Shit, by the looks of all of the characters of different canons and universes, I’m surprised some type of time rift didn’t occur, killing all the bastardizations of overrated cartoon characters.

MewStaria: I bet you're wondering why I called you here.

Ladies and Germs, Introducing MewStaria, MewbertyStaria17’s (Now BunnyAdrienne) OC. Basically, imagine Mewberty from Star and the Forces of evil, but as a complete abomination. Here’s a picture to anyone who refuses to believe me on this:

Marco: So you guys can kidnap me??!! No, stay away from me!!!

Too easy!

Mew: No. (whispers) But maybe later.
Star: To tell everyone that I'm a succubus?! The nerve of you treating your younger sister like garbage!!!

What would even give you that idea? Granted, you’ve already said she treats you like shit, but still.

Mew: Heh, Heh, No.
Jibanyan: To play roughly with me?
Mew: Sadly, No. I'm here to tell you all that, the Titans have gone too far, I say we attack, so I want you to suit up.

They must have gone so far, it’s not even worth mentioning

Gumball: But we don't have any costumes.
Mew: So, make some yourself.
All: Right.

Gumball: We also don’t have weapons to fight the Titans.

Mew: So make weapons because I’m sure you guys are mechanically gifted.

All: Right.

There originally was a link to some video game music embedded in the text above, but I decided to remove it completely because I don’t want people to associate their favorite video game tracks with this crap.

( later)
Gumball: I am Lucario!!!
Darwin: I am Aqualad!!
Marco: I am Kid Goku!!!

Are they having this battle at the Comic Con, where the Titans are trolling all of the neckbearded Teen Titans fans?

Star: I am Sailor Moon!!!
Jibanyan: I am Pikachu!!! {even if I'm a cat)

But there’s nothing wrong with Gumball being Lucario and Darwin being Aqualad?! What kind of fucked up logic is that?

Come to think of it, how are these costumes any good? Seeing how in this universe, just about any cartoon character you can imagine can exist, I just can’t buy into the fact that anyone would not think of them as anything but intruders. So what’s even the point of this? Its as if all the sudden, the author wanted to use different characters or something, and she was too lazy to rewrite the damn story.

Pinkipoo: I am Sylveon!!!
Twilight and the Mane 7: We are DC Superheroes!!!
Twilight: Wonder Woman!!!
Starlight: Supergirl!!!
Pinkie Pie: Kid Flash!!!
Rainbow Dash:The Flash!!!!
Applejack: Speedy!!
Rarity: Black Canary!!!
Fluttershy: Starfire. (comic version)

Did Fluttershy actually say “comic version”? If so, that must be the reason my buttocks have just left my body.

Grizz: I am Ragna!!!
Panda: I am Noel!!
Icebear: Icebear's Haikumen.
Mew: And I'll be.... Star Butterfly!!!

Which makes this whole costume thing entirely pointless.

Star: Wait, What?! I'm Star!!!
Mew: No, you're Sailor Moon.
Star: How can you be me when you're in your Mewberty form?
Mew: Watch this. (turns into her true form)
Marco: Wow, she's beautiful, she looks just like.....you?!

Don’t forget she’s a Mary Sue.

Star: Yes, she's my older twin.

Because knowing that served a purpose to the story.

Mew: Okay, are we done? Now let's go.
(The other characters run into battle while Jibanyan says, " This is just weird.", and then leaves into battle. Meanwhile, the Titans are preparing for the attack)
Robin: Alright, Titans, listen up. Mew and her team are coming for us!!
Cyborg: So what's the strategy?
(Meanwhile Staria is eavesdropping on their plan)

Robin: OK, so we’re going to make another crossover episode of our show, where we meet…Post Movie Spongebob! That should piss off a good number of cartoon nerds.

Robin: Anyways,......*gasp* Intruders!!!!!! It's MewStaria and (record scratch) she's beautiful.

Yeah, nevermind the fact she’s going to fucking kill you, she’s just that damned beautiful.

Cyborg: Dude!!! She's coming closer!!
Robin: She looks like Star, but with angel wings and brown colored.
Beast Boy: Should we help?
Raven: Nah, just wait for it.
Robin: She's so............GGGGGGGGGGAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!

Staria: (Attacks Robin)
Marco: Now!!!
All of the characters crash through the windows, and the real battle begins.
Marco: Hey Cyborg.
Cyborg: What?
Marco: Kamehameha!!! (blows Cyborg out of the Tower and follows him)

Jibanyan: Paws of Fury!!! (attacks Beast Boy)
Beast Boy: (Turns into a cheetah) So you like to mess with us huh?
Jibanyan: No, I just hate your show. Meow. (attacks him)

Jibanyan: Which makes writing a crappy fanfic killing all you guys justifiable

BB: (dodges turns into a hummingbird) Can't catch me!! (flies out of the window with Jibanyan chasing him)
Grizz: (To Starfire) I always hated you ever since "The Date"
Panda: How dare you treat Silkie like....like......
Pinkipoo: A Yokai?
Panda: Or I could say ghost.
Pinkipoo: Close Enough.

Panda: What about a retarded looking Pokémon ripoff?
Pinkipoo: That’s more like it.

(Silkie sadly slips away)
Starfire: No, Silkie, I still love you.
Grizz: Not Really, because you keep on mentioning your love of cats in almost every episode. You should be ashamed.
Starfire: Silence, you shall.....(screams as she is thrown out of the tower with a sword)

That doesn’t seem too safe.

(Grizz, Panda, and Pinkipoo turn around)
Icebear: Icebear thought her voice was irritating.

Icebear: Icebear killed Titan, me proud of meself.

Grizz: Agreed. After her. (All four of them jump out of the tower)

Seriously, these bears deserve the Nobel Prize right now.

Raven: Well, that takes care of them.
Star: Not yet.
Raven: What?!
Star: Butterfly Blast!!! (uses her wand to attack and Raven gets blasted, unfortunately it was a clone.)
Star: What?! Where are you, Raven?
Raven: Right here, you evil succubus!!! (blasts her magic at Star)
Gumball: No, you don't. (slashes Raven)
Darwin: I got you, my love.
Star: Thanks, Darwin!! (Kisses him)
Darwin: (faints in love)

No, you don’t have dyslexia, the author had just implied that Darwin is in fact Star’s love interest in this story.

I…I…I got nothing.

Gumball: Whoa.
(Star disappears along with Raven)
Then Robin wakes up and kidnaps the duo.
Meanwhile, the other heroes stand aside the titans and continue their battle.
Jibanyan: Paws of Fury!!!
Cyborg: (Blasts Jibanyan with a neon cannon)
Pinkpoo: Restore!!! (Restores Jibanyan's health)
Jibanyan: Thanks, Pinkipoo!
Pinkpoo: No problem.
Jibanyan: (slashes Cyborg repeatly and kills him)

Is it me, or is this story the equivalent of a 7 year old boy role-playing with his toys?

Grizz: Dragon Uppercut!!
Beast Boy: (dodges)
Twilight: Attack!!
(all ponies hack and slash in unison)
BB: (dies)
Jibanyan: Paws of Fury!!!
Starfire: (hits him with an eye blast) You'll have to be the quicker than that!!
Marco: You can't say "the" in the middle of a sentence and take this!!!!

Because why hit the backspace key when you can make your sue cast look so amazing for pointing out the obvious?

Kaikoken!!! (warps up to Starfire and blasts her to death)
Meanwhile, Star is confronting Raven.
Raven: So, you think that me being evil is wrong?

Raven: You mean to tell me something that’s condemned is condemned?

Star: Yes!!! You guys annoying the heck out of me, including my older sister.

Star: Which is why all you guys are a bunch of evil pricks that must suffer a slow and painful death.

*growls* Take this!!! Syrup Tsunami Shockwave!!!

Nice move dipshit! Now the Titan’s Headquarters crumbles along with all of you.

Raven: (shields herself until attack fades out)
Star: You got to be kidding me!!!
Raven: Now's my turn!! (uses her magic to take her out only to be taken out by Staria) (music ends)
Staria: Are you alright, Star?
Star: I'm fine. Well at least all of the Titans are down.
???: Not just yet!!
Staria: *gasp* Oh my god, You got to be kidding me!!!
(Giant Titan Robot Emerges from the sea)

Robin: You thought you won the battle, well, NO!!! Because we knew your friends were going to kill us!! So as a final stance, I'm controlling our Titan robot and using it to kill all of you!!! Goodbye, fools!!!
Star: Not on my watch!! (grows into a giantess)

If she could do that, this story should have been done long ago.

Robin: Trust me, Star Loserfly, I know all of your moves.
Star: No. You don't. Butterfly Blast!!!
Robin: (soars the robot in air, then descends towards Star with a Blazing Lightsaber)

Oh shit! Shit just got intense! And by that I mean this shit that I'm reading just got a little bit intense.

Star: (dodges) Miniheart Hurricane!!
Robin: (dodges) (Blasts Star with a Soundwave)
Star: (faints) 
Staria: NO!!!! Star!!!
Robin: Well it seems she's done and oh, I also have Gumball and Darwin held captive and put near a bomb......

“And that’s it, I didn’t tie them up or anything like that like a villain with common sense should, they’re just next to a bomb which is about to explode.”

Jibanyan: (from a distance) Paws of Fury!!! (bomb explodes) (comes back) Bomb....disabled (Gumball, Darwin and Jibanyan faint)

That’s like saying “Mission Accomplished” after all of your enemies you’ve failed to defeat beat you to a pulp and one of them eats your head off.

MewStaria: Really?
Robin: At least I still got......
Icebear: Warrior Sword. (slashes the robot in half)
Robin: (injured) What is going on?!
Panda: Looks like the tables are turned, meaning your good luck has run out.
Robin: Oh boy.
After Pinkipoo healed the fainted allies, all of the heroes beated up Robin to a pulp.
Robin: Please have mercy.....
MewStaria: (back in her Mewberty form) Uhhhhh.... No. (eats Robin's head off)

I really need to learn when to shut the fuck up.

Twilight: Blows up the Titan Tower. (music ends)
MewStaria: All right, now does everyone agree that this show sucks?
All: Yep.
MewStaria: Agreed.

And let's all agree that this fanfiction is cancer. Luckily, It's been wiped off the face of the internet.

Have a Happy New Year! Except for you, author!

This post has been edited by VGtree054: Dec 31 2016, 01:52 PM

My content can be found here.

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Post #2

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post Dec 31 2016, 08:08 PM
>tfw you realize you're so old that you no longer recognize any of the popular cartoons of the day.

Yikes, that was a mess.

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Post #3

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post Jan 2 2017, 10:31 PM
...Okay. This is discomforting for several reasons, one of which is personal.

1. The formatting. The GODAWFUL formatting. Word to the wise: Unless there is no other choice (like some kind of song or all that slag), do not use that. It's trite.

2. The art. I really hate to decry one's art due to the fact that it can always develop, but this is ridiculous. Still, there's hope. My art sucked aft until I manned up and got lessons.

3. The lack of self-awareness. Sure, there's some effort (key word: SOME), but it feels robotic and stupid. Wouldn't Twilight be a bit against killing? Couldn't this begin with the heroes (cough) deciding that these Titans weren't so bad until slag hit the fan with their antics? Some thought, please! Also, an OC that wasn't complete garbage.

4. The eerie resemblance this has to my own fanfiction series. I know I'm not supposed to talk about it due to a past incident here, but the concept remains. A bunch of characters from different universes (including a few bad apples), alongside an OC (mine's male and a complete loser, though), taking on evil/trying to get through the day. Also, a love for TAWOG and MLP. However, I can say without a doubt that I'm thankful I didn't go down the path of this fanfic. I mean, REALLY? Marco firing the Kamehameha wave?! He's great and all, but geez. Nailed that Chris Chan reference, though.

Literally, the only good thing about this is that the Teen Titans Go are getting the short end of the stick.

"New Favorite Show" my aft. Anyway, good mock, my friend.


The mistakes I see in this this work are to be pointed out so they may not be repeated.
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Post #4

I'm very concerned.

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post Jan 5 2017, 05:01 AM
Well, that was certainly something. It's been a while since I've read a hate fic, and it always surprises me how petty they really come across as.

Worst of it all, this was not even a sadistic one, merely a bland, unimaginative mess that shouldn't have made it beyond the exchanges of the author's action figure collection.

And building upon MasterOfNintendo's 3rd point, isn't this the most glorious example of the pathetic irony of it all? An author, when confronting what they feel is a poor envisioning or poor representation of cartoon characters or whatever, they then decide to grab all these other characters they like and warp them into OOC, murderous lunatics to destroy it. In attesting their dislike through this type of fanfic, they themselves become that which they hate.

This post has been edited by ConcernedGamer: Jan 5 2017, 05:02 AM

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