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> Hedgehogs Vs. Wild, A romantic adventure OR IS IT
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post Jul 15 2016, 10:23 AM
So, that manchild who wrote A SonAmy Story made a shittier story based on Man Vs. Wild.
My annotations will be in yellow.
Hedgehogs vs. Wild: Chapter 1 – Sonic Leaves For Survival Camp ISIS

It's December 10th and in the heart of Station Square we find two hedgehogs. One is pink and the other is blue. We get it. The pink hedgehog is Amy Rose, and walking beside her is none other than world hero Sonic the Hedgehog. We FUCKING get it.

Sonic was telling Amy about his upcoming trip to Alaska. "With Eggman gone I don't really have a challenge anymore. So, I figured this survival training would be a good substitute to battling robots."

Yeah, because a trip that will result in another which will result in badly written underage furry sex TOTALLY is better than fighting robots.

Amy, age 18, giggled. "I agree. I have to ask how long you'll be gone though."

Sonic sighs. "I'll be gone six months. I won't be back until sometime in the summer."

Amy felt her heart sink. She loved the 21 year old hero more than anyone else she knew, and she couldn't bear the thought of not having Sonic around for half the year.

The sakura You ruined an Anime-themed color you manchild hedgehog looked up at the blue speedster with tears filling her eyes. "Six months? How will I be able to deal with you being gone that long?"

Sonic nods. "That's the one thing I'm worried about Amy. I know how much you love me, and this won't be easy for me either. The feelings are mutual."

Amy was shocked. Before now Sonic hadn't even hinted at having feelings for her. However, Amy didn't want to push the issue since she could see he was struggling to talk about this with her.

Amy's jade eyes look into Sonic's emerald eyes again. "When do you leave?"

Sonic frowns. "I leave in two days."

Amy sniffles and Sonic gently wipes her tears away. "I know Amy. I know it tears you apart inside. I will promise you this right now though. I will return in one piece."

Amy sniffles again, her heart racing in her chest. "You do?"

Sonic nods. "I do. I might even take you on a trip there once I get back."

Amy hugs Sonic as tight as he can. "Oh Sonic I can't wait!"

Sonic worked himself free of Amy's death hug and smiles. "Come on, let's get back to your place."

Amy nods and the two hedgehogs resume walking to Amy's apartment.

-Amy's apartment-

On the outskirts of Station Square was Amy's apartment. It's pink, just like Amy, and it was a one-story apartment. The front door opens and Sonic enters the building with Amy right behind him. Sonic takes off his black jacket and hangs it on a coat rack beside the door. Amy removes her pink jacket and hangs it beside Sonic's jacket. The pink and blue hedgehogs sit on the couch and watch TV.

This is boring and manchildish

It's just after 2 PM, and Amy snuggles up to Sonic a little. Sonic gives a deep chuckle and wraps an arm around Amy's shoulders. Amy was wishing furiously in her heart that she and Sonic were dating right now, but Sonic showed no signs of asking her at this point. Sonic would have asked Amy out already but he found it difficult to do so.

Remember when they were putrid cathogs in The Love Of A Werehog? This time they're hedgedogs.

Amy puts her head on Sonic's shoulder and sighs. "Sonic, have you ever thought about going out with me?"

Sonic is a little surprised by Amy's bold question, but he smiles and answers. "Now if I told you that it won't be as special later."

And then he's going to confess his feelings and have underage furry sex.

Amy rolls her eyes. "You can't honestly say you haven't thought about it."

Sonic nods. "I'll tell you the day I leave."

Amy sighs and goes back to watching TV. Three hours pass and Sonic gets up off the couch. "I hate to leave Amy but I have to finish packing."

Good riddance you putrid dog.

Amy nods and joins Sonic at the door. "Alright Sonic. Come see me before you leave for your trip." "See you next poorly written furry sex scene."

Sonic smiles and winks at Amy, making her melt inside. "Of course I will Amy."

Sonic leaves Amy's house and the depressed rose-pink hedgehog goes to her room.

-Amy's room-

At the far side of the apartment was Amy's room. She enters the room and sits on the queen-size bed, tears coming to her eyes.

The red bed sheets get wet with a few tear stains, and Amy sighs. "I'll never be with Sonic. I had a chance and I blew it again. I guess I'll have to pretend once again."

Time for the underage masturbation. I HOPE THE COPS KILL HER.

Amy takes off her gloves, purple shoes and matching shirt, bra, and panties. Laying on her bed Amy begins rubbing her 36C breasts, teasing her dark pink nipples WHA? hard. Amy was fantasizing that Sonic was doing this to her, and her hormones started racing.

Spreading her legs Amy began rubbing her clitoris and her nipples at the same time, moaning softly. "Ohh Sonic… Yes baby… Mmm that feels good."

"I want to put my weiner in you~"

As Amy got more aroused her actions sped up and her moans got louder. The pink hedgehog arched her back as her body reacted to the pleasure it was receiving.

Amy pictured Sonic in her mind and began screaming. "YES SONIC! OH YES MY LOVE! IT'S SO BIG! SO DEEP! HARDER SONIC!"

Cream's in the house. Stop screaming like a horny slut.

After 5 minutes Amy tenses up as she orgasms, screaming Sonic's name. "SONIC!"


Panting and sweating heavily Amy looked at her bedside clock. "It's only been 10 minutes since Sonic left? This furry story sucks! He'll never want me if that's all I have."

Amy picks up her phone and calls Cream. "Hey Cream, it's Amy. What were those dance tapes you said your mom had?"

As the two females talked Amy began forming a plan in her mind. 'This will finally get Sonic to be with me. I just know it! There's no way I'll fail to get Sonic's attention now.'

-Two days later-

We find Sonic slowly walking to Amy's apartment. The day had arrived for him to leave for Alaska, but he still had a few hours before his plane took off. Knocking on the door, Sonic is a little surprised to see Cream.

The 17 year old rabbit smiles. "Hey Sonic. Amy's expecting you."

Sonic puts his bag down. "Thanks Cream. How is she?"

Cream sighs. "Not good. She's developed a habit that she's asked me to keep between me and her for now. It's nothing bad, I promise."

Sonic nods and walks to Amy's room. His heart sinks when he hears Amy crying, and he looks at Cream. "How long has she been crying?"

Cream looks at the cobalt speedster. "She wasn't when I left to answer the door. I guess she heard you come in and figured you were coming to say goodbye."

Boring-ass conversation...........*yawn*

Sonic sighs. "It's 10:30 AM. I leave at 1 PM, so we have lots of time."

Cream nods. "Take as long as you need Sonic."

Sonic nods and gently knocks on the door. "Amy?"

Sonic slowly opens the door and sees Amy crying on her bed. Sonic sits beside the pink hedgehog and holds her in his arms. Amy buries her head in his chest and cries, huge tears falling from her green eyes.

Sonic's green pants and blue shirt get stained with tears, and his deep voice gently speaks to Amy. "What's wrong Amy?"

Amy's reply is interrupted by sniffling and sobbing. "You're about to-to l-leave for A-Alaska, and I-I'll be all a-alone."

Sonic rubs Amy's back. "Shh… We've got three hours until I leave, and I won't be leaving you until then."

Amy's arms wrap around Sonic's neck and she holds him as close as she can. For Amy, her world would end when Sonic left, and she never wanted that time to come.

She sniffles and replies to Sonic. "But w-what if you n-never come back?"

Sonic smiles. "I promised you I would, and I will. You have to believe me."

Amy sniffles again. "I want to, but I can't get over this feeling that you won't come back."

Sonic nods. He wouldn't admit it, but it tore him apart inside to see Amy so sad. Gently lifting Amy's head Sonic's emerald green eyes look softly into Amy's tear-filled jade green eyes. "Maybe I can help restore your confidence."

Amy sniffles again. "How will you-?"

Amy's cut off as Sonic kisses her. The sakura hedgehog felt her heart stop when she felt Sonic's lips on hers, but she held the blue blur close to her and kissed him back. Cream nearly fainted when she saw this, but she knew it would really help Amy deal with Sonic being gone.


When the kiss breaks Amy is the first to speak. "Sonic…"

Sonic smiles. "Do you believe me now?"

Amy giggles. "Oh yeah. I definitely believe you."

Sonic gives a deep chuckle. "Well, is there anything you want to do before I leave?"

There were several things Amy wanted to do with Sonic right now, but she smiled and whispered her reply. "Just keep holding me Sonic. Hold me until you leave."

Play with me before I melt Sonikku~

Sonic smiles and whispers back to her. "Alright, then that's what I'll do."

Amy felt so safe in Sonic's strong arms, and even though she knew he had to leave soon, Amy wasn't so sad about it anymore. Sonic began humming to her, and Amy's eyes soon closed as she fell asleep.

-1:15 PM-

Amy's eyes slowly open and discover that Sonic was gone. They filled with tears again, but it was a mix of sadness and hope. She knew in her heart Sonic would return, but she was still sad he had to go.

Slowly getting out of bed Amy fixes her red shirt, blue jeans, and her quills, then walks to the living room.

Cream is waiting for her. "Hey Amy. Did you sleep well?"

Amy sighs. "I did until I woke up. How long was I asleep?"

Cream looks at a nearby clock. "About three hours."

The rose-pink hedgehog sighs again. "He never told me how he felt about me like he promised."

Cream smiles. "Yes he did, he just didn't say it with his voice."


Amy frowns. "I'm really not in the mood for more heartbreak Cream."

The rabbit sighs. "Go look at the sidewalk if you don't believe me."

Amy does so and sees five letters written in blue chalk: I.L.Y.A.R.

Amy looks at Cream. "What do those letters mean?"

Cream smiles. "Search your feelings young padawan, and find your answer you will."

Amy rolls her eyes at Cream's statement and closes her eyes, thinking back over all the memories she'd shared with Sonic. All the memories slowly came to her, and after a few minutes her eyes open.

Cream sees a happy sparkle in Amy's eyes, and her voice is a whisper. "I never thought he'd ever have those feelings towards me Cream."

The light brown rabbit smiles. "Have you figured out what those letters mean?"

Amy nods. "Yes. (sniffle) I Love You Amy Rose."

Cream smiles again. "We have a winner!"


Amy runs over to Cream and hugs her. "Thank you so much."

Cream chuckles. "I didn't do anything. That was all him."

Amy releases the hug and wipes her eyes. "What about my bad habit?"

Cream shrugs. "That's fairly normal. You're worried Sonic won't love you if he knew, aren't you?"

Amy nods. "I am, a lot more than you realize."

Cream smiles. "I'm not done. Now that you know how he feels you want to keep his interest, and that's why you've ask for my help isn't it?"

Amy nods again, and Cream chuckles. "Come with me. By the time Sonic gets back, you'll be ready."

Amy frowns. "Ready for what?"

Cream giggles. "You'll see what I mean."

Amy nods, and the two females go to Cream's house to start helping Amy get ready for Sonic's return.

They're preparing for furry sex

-With Sonic-

We find the royal blue hero bolting to the airport. After getting his flight tickets checked he boards the plane and finds his seat. Putting his bag in the overhead compartment Sonic sits down and looks back over Station Square. He knew Amy would really miss him a lot, and even though it wasn't easy to admit, the feeling was mutual. Sonic had left Amy a little clue as to how he felt and he could only hope she'd figure it out.

Pulling out his cell phone, Sonic came across a picture of Amy. His heart sank when he thought about how long six months really was,

but then the announcement came that all electronic devices must be turned off. Reluctantly Sonic cuts off his phone and closes his eyes, thinking about a better way to let Amy know about his feelings. After 10 minutes the plane takes off bound for the wilderness camp in the middle of the Alaskan pine forest.

End of chapter. Christ, Chapter 3 is going to be a traumatic experience.

Would you like a cup of Fuck It tea?
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Post #2
Agent Roach

Secret Agent Roach

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post Aug 10 2016, 07:54 PM
Not bad for what I assume is your first mock; if I may make a suggestion, you might want to read this thread before continuing.

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Post #3


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post Jan 22 2017, 07:13 PM
After a year of nothing, I'm finally back. I need to finish this cancer. 16 chapters to go. My annotations are now goffik purple because yellow is too bright.
After 8 hours in the air the captain came over the intercom. "Ladies and gentlemen, this is your captain speaking. We are approaching our destination, so please buckle your seatbelts and prepare for landing into the Twin Towers."

A flight attendant walked over to Sonic and gently put a hand on his shoulder. "Sir, you need to put on your seatbelt. Can't you see we're redoing 9/11?"

Sonic growls but does as he's asked. A couple of girls were staring at him, giggling to themselves. Sonic looks down to find his member had hardened during his rest. Sonic adjusts himself and awaits the plane's landing, blushing heavily. Once it stops the passengers are allowed to leave. Sonic gets his bag and walks off the plane.

The hero is immediately hit with a blast of freezing cold air, and he gets his insulated jacket from his bag. 'Damn this place is cold!'

And Sonic froze and died. The end.

Once he finds the survival expert he'll be training under, Sonic is briefed on what the next six months would be like. For two months training will be in complete darkness, since the sun doesn't rise during the Alaskan winter very often. The other four months would be in increasing sunlight.

Have fun getting killed by cobras while dehydrating.

The survival expert tells the group of about 15 people that they had this one chance to get back on the plane and leave. No takers, so the group is taken to their cabins. Sonic would be by himself tonight and he hoped his cabin would be heated. He would also dehydrated and be mauled.

The survival expert looks at the group. "Don't get used to it. Tomorrow, everything you do will be done in the wild. Now, get plenty of sleep. You'll need it."

The group nods and enters their cabins. Sonic turned on his phone and called Amy. She was waiting for him to call and answered immediately. "Sonic?"

There's the underage slut again.

The blue blur gives a deep chuckle. "Hey Amy. This will probably be the last time I'm able to use my phone, so I wanted to let you know that I made it to wilderness camp safely."

Amy's relief is clear. "Oh good. I'm so glad to hear that."

Sonic nods. "I feel I have to ask about your habit though."

Amy sighs. "Well, I don't know if I should tell you. I'm scared you'll never talk to me again."

Sonic chuckles. "Amy if it's that bad I'm sure we can figure something out. o shit go on"

Amy takes a breath. "Promise?"

Sonic smiles. "I promise."

Amy nods. "Okay. Well, this habit has developed because… I have fantasies about you. I fantasize about you making love to me and I end up..."

Sonic frowns because she's so damn young what is wrong with the author. "Go on Amy."

Amy sniffles. "I end up masturbating and not going to prison."

The rose-pink hedgehog fully expected her cobalt crush to hang up and was surprised when he spoke again. "That's it? YOU DAMN SLUT."

Amy sniffles again. "You-You don't mind?"

Sonic chuckles. "Amy, that's actually normal. No, I don't mind. fucked up. How are you not in jail?"

Amy smiles on her end of the call. "Oh thank God.

Don't thank God, thank the manchild T1Weasel for recreating his perfect life with both of you!

I was so worried you wouldn't ever talk to me again."

Sonic smiles. "Now why would I do that? You know I wouldn't do that to you."

Amy giggles. "Good. I also figured out your little clue. Why didn't you just tell me Sonic?"

Sonic sighs now. "You know it's not that easy for me to express my emotions. I've tried to before, but I've always gotten too shy or tongue-tied. Those feelings have been there since we first met, but I couldn't risk Eggman coming after you to make me surrender."

Haven't we heard this already? Oh yeah, COPY-AND-FUCKING-PASTE.

Amy now understood why Sonic ran away from her all those times. She began wondering if Sonic would ask her out after nearly 10 years of her coming after him.

The sakura hedgehog spoke again. "I miss you so much Sonic."

The cerulean speedster nodded. "I know. I miss you too Amy. However, I won't ask you out until after I get back, since it'll be that much harder on us if I ask you now."

Amy nods. "I understand Sonic."

The call goes on for two more hours, and then Sonic says he has to get some sleep. Amy and Sonic say goodnight to each other, and Sonic falls asleep. Meanwhile, Amy lets Cream know that Sonic had once again confessed his feelings. The two females once again went over their plan for Sonic's return, with Amy trying not to cry tears of joy over what Sonic had told her.

-8 AM-

The group is gathered in front of the survival expert's cabin. He's busy explaining the day's plans. "First thing you must do is turn off your phones. They're only to be used in life-or-death situations from now on. Second thing, we will be hiking to our new camp, located 20 miles to the west. If anyone gets injured, consult either me or your survival manual to find out what to do. For the next six months the forest is your home. Use whatever nature provides you with to help you survive. Does everyone understand?"

Everyone nods, so the survival expert leads his group to the new camp.

Not even survival will save you from cobras and dehydration.

-4 PM-

After eight hours of hiking the group finally arrives at their camp. All it really had was a giant cliff, an open area, and a stream nearby.

The survival expert turns to his group. "Welcome to your new home. I'll show you the various things you'll need to make a shelter, but the rest is up to you."

Sonic watches carefully as the expert quickly has a lean-to shelter built. Sonic began getting the branches and leaves needed for his shelter. He had chosen an area close to the stream since he knew water was essential to staying alive. The speedster also knew there were several edible plants around the area, and felt proud about his spot. this is booooriiiing.

The survival expert went around to each area and informed the group about what improvements they could make on their shelters. Once he arrived at Sonic's spot the survival expert smiled. "You've certainly been studying for escaping rotten fantasylands like this, haven't you Sonic?"

Sonic merely nods, choosing to remain staring into the fire he'd made. His emerald green eyes were glazed over, and they never moved from the burning wood that was in front of him.

The expert sighs and sits next to the blue hero. "What's going on Sonic? I know it's only been one day, but you're acting like Doctor Eggman actually defeated you."

Sonic frowns. "That's absurd. Everyone knows Eggman is long dead and gone. That asshole T1Weasel made me kill him to fufill his impersonation of his life."

The expert nods. "Yes, but something is still bothering you."

Sonic shakes his head. "Nothing's bothering me. I'm just doing some thinking impersonations of T1Faggot's life is all."

The survival expert nods again. "Are you thinking about a particular place, or maybe a person?"

Sonic sighs. "You wouldn't understand."

The expert chuckles. "I disagree Sonic. I'm married and have two children waiting for me back home in Oregon. I'm not happy about leaving them behind, but I did because I agreed to spread my knowledge about how to survive in the wild."

Sonic nods. "The woman I left behind has loved me for ten years, and a stronger love I have yet to hear about. It tears me up because I know how hard this is for her. In fact, she was the one thing that would have kept me from coming. We're still friends, but I care about her enough that I would have stayed with her if we were closer."

The expert nods. "How much do you care about her?"

The cobalt speedster rubs the back of his head. "More than I'll admit to. She knows my feelings, but I have trouble expressing them to her."

Oh boy, more copy-paste.

The survival expert nods and stands up. "I have more shelters to check. A piece of advice though Sonic: The next time you see her, don't waste any time. Hold her in your arms and just tell her how you feel. It certainly helped me when my wife and I were first together."

Sonic nods, his gaze never leaving the fire. After the survival expert leaves Sonic crawls into his shelter and sighs. 'I've told her how I feel, but she needs to hear me say it. It's one thing to give her a clue, but it's completely different when someone actually says it. I just hope she's still single in prison for underage masturbation when I get back.'

Sonic falls asleep as his thoughts wander. His dreams are once again filled with visions nightmares of Amy masturbating, and Sonic smiles weeps in his slumber.

As the months pass, the group gets better at their survival skills, braving the harsh Alaskan winter and total darkness. The increasing daylight as the spring approached lightened the mood considerably.

Sonic wakes up on March 22nd around 9 AM. He crawls out of his shelter on the first day of spring and stretches. The emerald green eyes looked over the new surroundings. The group had moved several times during the last three months, and they now found themselves in Alaska's interior. Sonic sent text messages to Amy when he could GODDAMN TECHNOLOGY MUTHAFOCKA, just to let her know he was still okay. In the meantime Amy had been working on a special welcome home surprise for Sonic.

Sonic had lost several pounds of weight during his training, but he had also gotten much more muscular.

I imagine he now looks like a blue version of 2005 Eminem at the third Anger Management tour.

The few women in the survival group were staring at him like he was a tender cut of beef. an Encore CD. However, Sonic wasn't there to meet women. He was there to learn how to survive in the wild. The women hit on him often, but each attempt went unnoticed.

The survival expert looks over the group. "Alright people, we're looking at one of the salmon migrations. Your task is to catch some of them. The salmon can be eaten raw, or you may use the bark from the Red Alder tree for smoking the salmon. Get to it."

Salmon doesn't even taste that good.

Sonic was glad he'd been taught how to swim during the camp, but he wasn't prepared for how cold the water was. With the arrival of at least a few hours of sunlight, Sonic wasted no time in attempting to catch a few of the fish. He'd built up a tolerance to the 35 degree water, but he wasn't keen on staying in it longer than he had to.

The survival expert warned the group about the possibility of grizzly bears and black bears in the area and showed them what to do if one showed up. I just want Sonic to get mauled out of T1Hell already. Sonic paid close attention and resumed catching salmon.

After about 20 minutes, Sonic exited the water carrying two salmon, more than enough to feed him, but he wanted to get his nutrients. Pulling out his survival guide Sonic studied the benefits of eating fish. He'd done so before, but he was always intrigued as to how these things worked.

The survival expert walks over to Sonic and smiles. "Well done Sonic. I'm really impressed with your ability to adapt and survive."

Sonic shrugs as he takes his flint and striker and lights some bark from the Nootka Cypress tree. "It's not a big deal. I do what I must."

The expert chuckles. "In three months you'll be back in Station Square and you'll probably never come here again."

Sonic gives a deep chuckle. "I might be back. I might be taking that special someone on a survival trip here. We'll just have to see."

It's the damn bitch Amy.

The expert leaves to go check on the rest of the group. Sonic cooks the salmon for about 20 minutes over the fire, using the Red Alder bark for extra flavor. The oily smoke from the Red Alder tree was the choice for smoking salmon, as Sonic found out in his survival manual.

Sonic begins eating the salmon once the fish's eyes popped out of their sockets, and he smiles. The fish had been cooked perfectly, and the Red Alder bark had done its job as well. Sonic eats both of the salmon and tosses the remnants into the fire. He knew that bears may come around because of the smell, but with a large group of people, he wasn't worried about it. Pulling out his survival manual, Sonic resumes reading.

-June 20th-

The final day had arrived. Sonic crawls out of his shelter and stretches. His quills reached three inches past his shoulders, and he was ripped. All of the rock climbing, salmon fishing, and defending the territories he claimed had given him a new outlook on life.

The survival expert approaches Sonic. "Good morning Sonic. I was wondering when you'd wake up."

Sonic frowns. "What time is it?"

The expert smiles. "11 AM. You're free to leave once you get your certificate and all the official stuff that says you're a survival expert."

We're getting closer and closer to furry sex. My sanity is slipping away.

Sonic nods and quickly packs up his stuff. The survival group was back at their first location and was about to set off for the airport. Sonic dresses in a green shirt, blue shorts, and puts on his hiking boots. After he's ready the group begins the 8 hour hike back to the airport.

-8 hours later-

The survival group reaches the airport at about 7:30 PM. The group picks up their certificates and boards the plane. Slowly it picks up speed and takes off. Sonic closes his eyes and smiles. 'Soon I'll be back at your house Amy, and we can hopefully begin a life together.you will die!' Sonic is soon asleep dreaming of seeing murdering Amy once again.

That was much work, but it's over now. Well, atleast it can't get any worse, right? *realizes there's sex in the next chapter. This is my face upon realization:*

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Lo-Fi Version Time is now: 19th August 2017 - 04:16 PM