The laprasking Fan Fics, Which ones turn you on? Options

[Moose]

You try that and I guarantee your liver will completely shut down before you even get done with the third fic.

[shiroamasa]

Hey, Do you mind if I take a shot at this?

Deep within an unknown jungle, Franziska von Karma had gotten herself lost. She had purchased a cheap package flight from Kong Airlines and needed a vacation from Prosecuting and that "foolish fool", Phoenix Wright.


And she wanted to become like her childhood idol, Tarzan! Or was it Jane Goodall?


Her luggage was sent ahead by the airline staff to her hotel and she had decided to get there on foot for fresh air. However, soon enough the path vanished, and she had become lost within the jungle.


Uh-oh. Frannie better hope that she doesn't get bitten by one of those monkeys with diseases.


"Great, what fool made this path?" said Franziska angerly. "That fool shall pay with my whip, assuming the luggage staff delivered it safely."


Oh, really? Maybe you can use that thing to tame the majestic king of all beasts, the MIGHTY LION!


She continued moving though the leafs and branches in her way, sweating within her Prosecutor's outfit. Quite why she wore it on her holiday was another question that would remain unanswered. She figured she had to get to the hotel soon, there was no telling what larked within the forest at night time, let alone during the day time.


Or maybe she wanted to play "20 questions" with her new beau.


Soon enough, Franziska found herself in an open circular field, with ruins sticking out of the grass. She walked towards the stone pillars, observing the strange text engraved within them.


"Do not disturb, unless you like getting snakes shoved up your ass."


"This must be one of the tourist spots. I must be close by!"





Suddenly, Franziska got that uneasy feeling like she was being watched. She could hear a silent rustle of the bushes nearby that seemed to get louder and louder. Swiftly turning around, she saw a monkey jump out, grabbing and swinging on a tree branch, before landing feet first on one of the stone platforms. Dixie Kong had arrived to observe the human presence.


Oh, hey! It's sweet little Dixie!


"Bah, just a foolish stupid monkey." said Franziska. "I thought for a moment you'd actually be a treat like a tiger or something."


....You know what, fuck you, Frannie. Monkeys are cool.


Dixie didnt seem to understand what she was saying, instead playing with a small stone relic with her hands.


Dawwwwwwwwwwww.... How cute...


"What does the foolish monkey have?" wondered Franziska.


Something that can turn you into a spoiled brat, I hope.


Just then, Dixie threw the stone in the air, stood on her hands and grabbed the falling stone with her feet, pointing it at Franziska. A green beam shot out of the stone onto Franziska, causing a green energy to surround her.


Dear God. Is my wish coming true?!


"W-W-What is this foolishness?" panicked Franziska, as she observed her hand which was beginning to shrink. In fact, her whole body was shrinking! Her clothes began to feel baggy as she regressed back to her teenage years, then high school years, then preteen as her breasts returning into her body and her curves began to vanish. Regressing to eight, she slipped out of her shoes and her skirt and panties dropped down to her feet.


.....Ok, that was a bit too much info for me. And "teenage years"? Aren't you a teenager at high school? What the hell?


"P-p-please stop." Franziska cried, swiftly holding her hands to her mouth in surprise, hearing her once sweet seven year old voice once again. At four, she fell into a sitting position and her whole body was small enough to fit through the collar of her jacket. By the time the regression stopping, she once a one year old baby again! Franziska looked her now chubby arms in horror. Dixie moved forward towards the baby and put a ribbon on her head.


....Ok, I take it back. This is too cruel, even for Frannie here.


"Well now." said Dixie. "Think we can understand each other now."


....HOW?!


"Wait." said Franziska. "Monkey can talks now?"





"Better then you can baby."


LINGUISTICS DO NOT WORK THAT WAY!


Franziska could not understand how Dixie was talking. Was this the effect of the stone, or could she talk all this time and was just stalling? Whatever the reason, Dixie pushed Franziska onto her back and got something out, something that scared Franzika the most.


I hate you, laprasking. You may not be DKM, or Yunagirlamy, but you're one messed up son of a bitch.


"D-D-Diaper?" she cried.



Ooh, yes! A diaper for baby! Coothie-coothie-coo!



"Don't cry baby." said Dixie. "Let's just get rid of these big girl clothes, you won't be needing them anymore!"


And give them to Goodwill! They need clothes like yours!


Crying was all Franziska could do. She laid then as a naked baby powerless while Dixie changing her into a diaper using her monkey feet. This was so humiliating.



I really feel sorry for Frannie here. And you know your story is bad when you feel sorry for a character that most people DON'T like in a video game franchise!



"I-I-I'm no baby! Please change me back!"


No, Frannie, you aren't. But you are, or were, a full-grown bitch.


With no reply and being completely diapered, Franziska tried to crawl away, as her legs had not developed for walking, but Dixie kept grabbing her with her hands and feet in a monkey fashion. Soon enough, Franziska realized that there was no way she would be getting away. Her tiny arms and legs tired quickly, so she just gave up.


At this point, what should I say? I just hope that the others don't find this jungle.


"Now, let's get you dressed my little baby."


Ooh, dress-up!


Dixie began dressing her baby into a baby blue baby romper, pulling it up her lehs, inserting her arms in then zipping it at the baby, while taking care not to get her skin caught in the zipper. To finish off, Dixie added a bow on her head for added cuteness.


D'awwwwwwwwwwwww! Isn't she the cutest little baby you've ever seeen?


"Oh god." Franziska said to herself terrified. "I'm going to be brought up again in a jungle by a monkey!". She could not stop crying at her fate.





"Let's see if we can change that attitude of yours." smiled Dixie as she showed the ancient relic to Franziska. A green hypnotic energy glowed from the stone, and onto Franziska's eyes. It was like the stone was a large rubber, erasing all her memories of past as a Prosecutor. No more Phoenix, no more Edgeworth, no more whiping, just the simplest baby thought left with her new life as child to a monkey. Once the stone stopped glowing, Franziska raised her arms in the arm, trying to grab the stone, not to try to change back, but smiling like a baby wanting her rattle.


....NOW I feel bad for Frannie.


"Agooooo." she replied. Her old identity was long gone.


Laprasking is, indeed, an asshole. Congrats.


"Awwww, you are so adorable!" smiled Dixie. "You're going to love your new life my baby, and as long as I have this stone, you will never age and never leave my arms. Mommy's ALWAYS going to be with you, my dear Franny Kong!"





Holding her baby with one arm, Dixie jumped into a tree and swung from tree to tree to get home. All that remained of Franziska were her old clothes, and local folk tales about a monkey and her baby, always the same age and appearance, for many decades to follow.


And the author was fapping to this story after he read it.


In the end, Franziska was the foolish fool to under estimate and be fooled by a monkey. Now she was a doomed baby, forever.


That's right. Frannie's a fool, I'm a fool for mocking it, and the fucking author is a fucking FOOL! FOOLY COOLY!


The fooly cooly End


FOOLY COOLY!

[oneluckyduck]

I am strangely insulted by the first story...but, alas, I am too tired to read them all right now. Goodnight!

[Moose]

I have to say, that was the least insulting fic of laprasking's I've seen.
I COULD go check out his other stories, to see if there are any others that aren't bad, but, eh. I don't think it'd be worth reading without mocks.

[YTB]

You can't dispute that it's bad, it's just not put a bullet through your brain bad.

[Kuramastrass]

The only way you could play that drinking game and not die is if your name is Master of AFTER. Anyway, my turn! I can't let you guys have all the fun

Abso-Flute Control!

Lame pun, check. This is about as clever as "Your Horrorscope For Today".

On a hot summer's day, in a forest within the Sinnoh region, the wild Bidoof played cheerfully and the wild Starly flew around in unison.

Shall I compare this fanfic to a summer's day?

It was a peaceful day, but the peace was about to broken. Falling out the sky from another one of their failed attempts to capture Pikachu and screaming for their lives, the trio of Team Rocket crashed to the ground below, scaring the wild Pokemon away. The trio were used to blasting off, but the pain was always sore.

"Owe, why do none of our plans ever work?" moaned Jessie as she got up from the ground .

Obviously our buddy laprasking was too busy masturbating to be a good father to that poor lost period over there. I'm actually pretty impressed; we're only two paragraphs in, and not much has happened yet.

"Yeah, I've lost count of how much debt we our in, creasing giant mecha robots to capture that Pikachu." signed Meowth.

Meowth is so stressed from all the debt they're in, he's losing his grasp on proper English. He cursed under his breath as he realized that but finished signing the new set of IOU's anyway.

"Say, where did James land?" asked Jessie.

"I dunno, when we crashed down, I only remember hearing a loud splash sound..." replied Meowth.

"Ah..."

Meowth: Probably got attack by a herd of Magikarp or something.

A short silence followed before they realized the problem fully.

"A LOUD SPLASH SOUND?" They both screamed, looking over the large lake that laid before them.

"D-Did he land in the lake do you think?" asked a worried Jessie.

Meowth: I'm tell you, he probably got attack by a herd of Magikarp!

"Must of done, hope he didn't sink to the bottom..."

Just then, a figure splashed out of the water. It was James, carrying a chest.

The mutilated chest of a woman.

"James, you're alive!" said a delighted Jessie, happy to see her team mate of many years was okay.

If this story isn't Jessie/James in some way, even though I know this is laprasking, I will be disappoint.

"Only just." puffed out James as he fell on all fours to the ground.

Author's expected reaction: KIIIIIIIINKY!

My actual reaction: OH GOD NOT AGAIN

"When I splashed into the water, I sank to the bottom. I thought I was a goner, but I only just made it to the surface in time!"

"So what's with the chest James?" asked Meowth.

"Oh that, I saw it at the bottom of the lake, I figured something might be inside so I carried it to the surface."

This is James's logic:

Hmm, I'm sinking to the bottom of this lake. I'm running out of air quickly, so if I don't start swimming as hard as I can to the surface soon I'm gonna -- ooh look a shiny chest! I'll swim down to it, pry it from the mud, and bring it up to the surface with me!

This is why you always lose, Team Rocket.

"TREASURE!" Shouted Jessie and Meowth.

Meowth used one of his claws to pick-lock the lock on the chest. After successfully breaking it open, the lid opened to reveal a flute within the chest.

"A flute?" said Jessie angerly. "What good is that?"

Music can soothe the savage beast. Better hurry, all your screaming has angered the Beedrill. Or Vespiquen, depending on the generation you prefer.

"Maybe it's a special flute?" pondered Meowth.

"It sort of resembles a Poke Flute, but the design is all different." pondered James.

Little did they know it was actually a White Flute. And when they played it, they were attacked by a bunch of (insert Pokemon of choice here) and died. The end.

James picked the flute up.

"Say, maybe it's like the PokePiper of old?" wondered James.

"Oh yeah, that old story." said Jessie.

"Poke what?" asked Meowth.

"Its a fairytale about a town pledged with Rattata and Raticate that caused trouble for the townsfolk.

Well yeah, if you pledge your life to Rattata and Raticate, that might cause a few problems.

One day, a guy calling himself the PokePiper used his flute to put the Rattata and Raticate into a hypnotic trance and they followed the Pokepiper and his tune right out of Town!" told James.

I believe this is proof for my theory that this is a White Flute just being used in a non-standard way.

"However, when the mayor did not reward the PokePiper for his kind deed, the PokePiper got made and played his tune to take away all the townsfolk's Pokemon. Under the spell of the tune, all the Pokemon followed him, and they were never seen from again!"

Well in his defense, there was probably nothing left to reward him with, seeing as how the town had been run by Pokemon for a few years. Place was nearly in ruins.

"Yes, I remember being told that tale in Kindergarten." smiled Jessie.

There is no trainer school kindergarten. I mean what would you learn there, the names of all the Pokemon? Actually, considering how many there are now, that's not a bad idea...

"Interesting, why don't we give this flute to da boss?" said Meowth. "Imagine da boss one day..."

"This isnt the time for one of your dumb boss fantasies Meowth." yelled Jessie.

James: I mean, since Giovanni's a dude, I think giving him the flute would be a little redundant, Meowth. Just sayin'. That is, unless his own flute is lacking in size if ya know what I mean...

"We KNOW what we're going to do with the flute already!"

"Yes." said James. "Let's proceed with the story plot shall we?

Plot? PLOT? THERE IS NO PLOT HERE! THE PLOT IS AS REAL AS THE END QUOTATION MARKS FOR THAT LAST SENTENCE!

Later that night, in a further part of the forest, Ash, Brock and Dawn had set up camp for the night. The 3 were already asleep in their tents after an intense orgy, including several wild Pokemon, all of the Pokemon in their possessions, and the Officer Jenny and Nurse Joy from the nearest town busy day defending their Pokemon from Team Rocket again. Hiding in a bush nearby, Team Rocket looked to see if the close was clear.

"Hehheh." whispered Jessie. "When I play this flute, all the twerp's Pokemon will walk out here to be ours finally, including Pikachu!"

"You sure you know how to play that thing?" asked James.

Jessie smacked James upside the head. "Of course I do! It can't be much different than giving you a blow job, since they're about the same size."

"Damn straight!"

"Oh, how hard can it be?" said Jessie, as she placed the flute in her mouth, blew into the flute, and started playing.

That almost plays right into my joke...

"I sure hope you washed that old thing before you use it." signed Meowth.

And so, the tune played. Nobody n the campsite heard the tune, not even the Pokemon, expect for one person.

Officer Jenny jumped to her feet and unloaded her gun's contents into the bushes.

Dawn slept silently in her sleeping bag. Suddenly, she heard a tune. It was a smoothing sound that was beautiful and entrancing.

"That sound." whispered Dawn. "It's...so...hypnotic..."

I'm trying to imagine something else, but I can't. All I can hear is the last track from the Pokemon the Movie 2000 soundtrack.

Dawn entered into a trance and got out of her sleeping bag. She then walked out of her tent and followed the source of the tune.

"Oh no, it's one of the twerps!" panicked Meowth.

"Wait, something's not right." said James.

James: You hear that? She's muttering what sounds like "Kcoc ruoy kcus tsumi kcoc ruoy kcus emlet". JESSIE I'M SCARED

Dawn walked up to Team Rocket with her arms held out forward. She stopped in front of the bush they were hiding in. Jessie stopped playing the flute.

"What. Is. Your. Wish? My Masters?" said Dawn, still stuck in a trance.

"Woah." said a surprised James. "Instead of hypnotizing Pokemon, we hypnotized the girl twerp!"

"Oh really?" wondered Jessie. "Stand on one leg."

Dawn did as instructed and stood on one leg.

She wasn't really hypnotized though, she was just humoring them.

"So this thing is special after all!" smiled Jessie.

"Da Boss would love this!" said Meowth

"Oh, why?" asked James.

Meowth: Nobody inside Team Rocket won't give him a blow job, but just imagine! Now he could get the blow job MASTER Gary Oak to give him one!

"Watch, hey twerp, go back into your tent and put this on!" Meowth threw an outfit at Dawn. Dawn picked it up and walked back into her tent. Shortly after, she returned to Team Rocket now sporting a Maid outfit.

"Any more requests, my masters?" asked Dawn.

"See?" said Meowth.

"Where did you get a maid outfit from?" asked Jessie.

"Oh, from around." replied Meowth.

Meowth: I mean, it's too big for me, but that doesn't mean I can't imagine...

"But yeah, imagine the recruits we can get using the flute!" said James. "Perfect obeying sexy servants of Team Rocket that'll do whatever we say!"

"Hang on." said Jessie. "If this thing hypnotizes beautiful girls, why didn't I get hypnotized?"

"Erm..." said James.

"Well..." signed Meowth.

A short silence followed.

"WHY DOES NOBODY ANSWER?" Shouted Jessie.

They know her secret. Jessie is actually Jesse - a man.

"Shhh." said James, not wanting the other twerps to wake up.

"Well, the one playing the flute must not get effected." said Meowth.

IT'S NOT VERY EFFEC - *is shot*

"Yeah..." said Jessie. "That must be it!"

The next day, in yet another part of the forest, Team Rocket were discussing what to do next with their magic hypno flute. Dawn, now sporting a classic black Team Rocket outfit, stood to attention awaiting further orders.

When I think of "classic" Team Rocket outfits, I don't think of the ones from the games. I think of the ones JessieJesse and James wear in the anime -- and those are white.

"So, what's the plan Meowth?" asked James.

"I know how we can get a huge number of recruits at once, but first, we need a few more girls..."

A few days later in the Johto region, the Pokemon coordinator May was in a local Pokemon Centre. She stood at the reception desk as Nurse Joy healed her Pokemon.

"There you go, your Pokemon are fully restored!" said Nurse Joy kindly.

Joy: "We hope to see you soon!"

May: "BITCH DO YOU HOPE MY POKEMON GET HURT?"

"Thank you!" said May.

Suddenly, a strange tune started playing nearby.

"Say, that's that sound?" asked May.

"I don't know." said Nurse Joy. "But it sounds...so...

"Relaxing." said May, as both girls entered a trance, held out their arms and followed the tune to the source. Outside, Team Rocket and Dawn were waiting for them.

"Excellent!" said Jessie. "Please strip out of your clothes and into these Team Rocket uniforms!"

"Yes our masters!" said Nurse Joy and May in sq-inc with each other, as they stripped to their underwear on the spot and put on the uniforms.

I think you mean "sync". As in "N*SYNC", or "Titanic is syncing". (Titanic is what I call my iPod.)

A few more days later at the Cerulean City Gym, the local Gym Leader Misty was taking a break by swimming in the pool. Soon after, she got out and dried herself with a towel.

As opposed to drying herself with a sandpaper dildo...?

"That was a great swim." Misty said to herself.

Once again, a familiar tune was played.

"That sound, it sounds...so...beautiful."

Like the other girls, Misty entered a trance and held her arms out as she walked towards the source. Entering the pool area were Misty's sisters.

Wait a minute, Misty is ugly as fuck. What gives?

"Hey Misty, you wanna go out to grab a bite to eat for lunch?" asked Daisy.

Misty did not respond, just continuing walking and exiting the gym.

"What's wrong Misty?" asked Daisy. "You're not going outside...in your...swimming...costume...are you...

Misty's sisters all entered into a trance and followed Misty outside to where Team Rocket were standing with Dawn, May and a Joy in Team Rocket uniforms.

"That should be more then enough "helpers" for our plan!" smiled Meowth.

Now let's steal that Pikachu so we can give it to Santa for Christmas!

A week later, a big Pokemon Tournament for Girls was advertised in Kanto.

I'm having flashbacks to that stupid-as-shit filler episode.

Female trainers all over the world came along to complete for pride, glory, and the prize of a Legendary Pokemon, Arceus! The girls were packed into a large hall, waiting for the tournament to begin.

"Something's not right." said the Sinnoh Champion Cynthia.

Cynthia: "What are they thinking, handing out the Pokemon who's more or less GOD?"

"You're right." said Zoey. "Where the battle field for this thing?"

"Maybe it's somewhere else we'll be taken too?" wondered Marina.

"Could be." said Anabel.

Just then, a loud tune placed from the speakers on the walls.

"What's that sound?" asked Greta.

"I dunno." said Anabel.

The tune continued on, the girl's were starting to get drowsy.

Quick! Someone fetch Poke-coffee!

"Can't...focus." struggled Jasmine.

"Tune...too...beautiful..." struggled Angie.

Every girl in the hall soon entered into a trance, standing to attention. Team Rocket entered the hall with Dawn, May, Misty and her sisters, and Nurse Joy, delighted with their work.

"Brilliant!" said Meowth. "I know if we got enough slaves, we could organize a big event to get a large number of girls!"

What.

"With all these girls, we could even run our own Team Rocket!" joked James.

"Okay girls!" commanded Jessie. "Please strip to your underwear, and follow me!"

The large crowd of girls began stripped out of their clothes and down to their underwear. Once all stripped, Jessie played the flute and the crowd followed her and Team Rocket out the building.

They're already under their control, they don't need to play the flute to get them to move.

The girls marched with their arms faced forward down the street. It was like a big parade or an army marching down the street, only with girls just in their underwearMOTHERFUCKING ZOMBIES. As they walked on with Jessie continuing to play the flute, girls passing by got hypnotized into a trance and joined the crowd, while stripping out of their clothes to just their underwear. Anyone from the desperate housewives to Officer Jenny got caught by the spell. Once out of town, the march continued to the next town, and then the next town, and the next town, and the next town, all until they would reach Team Rocket base where Team Rocket uniforms and a life of crime and for some, entertaining the male Team Rocket members, was waiting for them.

No, the regular members don't get to have any fun. Giovanni's just going to take them all.

Soon enough, the world was conquered by a now much sexier Team Rocket.

Butch and Cassidy? I don't remember them being in this story.

The End

Well there was none of that changing boys to girls crap, for which I am grateful. However, I had a bunch of opportunities to make a "Jesse's Girl" joke and I didn't, and for that I am disappoint in myself. Good day.

[YTB]

No sex? I'm starting to lose my faith in laprasking to give us the sexy horror he's become so well known for.

[Moose]

Wait, you're DISAPPOINTED with the lack of fucked up sex? I think YTB is hiding some sort of fetish from everyone.

Anyway, wanna know what's bugging me lately? Everyone typing expect instead of except in their stories these days! Does it take that long to look over and make sure your paragraph is correct? And dyslexia is not an excuse. Hell, I've got it, and I still try and make sure all my shit is typed up fine.

It just... pushes my buttons at this point. But then, what doesn't?

[YTB]

Wait, you're DISAPPOINTED with the lack of fucked up sex? I think YTB is hiding some sort of fetish from everyone.

It's called a joke, bro.

[Moose]

Cool joke, but... I'm not your bro, bro.

This post has been edited by Moose: Apr 17 2011, 01:37 PM

[Shockwave S08]

I can’t believe I’m opening this can of worms again, but it has to be done. Since this crazy fuck can’t stop posting drivel of the lowest caliber on FF.net, I’m gonna rip apart his newest travesty, “Genesis of the PokeGirls”. Suck on THAT, laprasking!

On the dark outskirts of Celedon City stood an dark abandoned rundown building.

At the broken-down entrance, there was a sign placed on it that said “FREE CANDY”. Seems legit enough.

This once important place was a laboratory for Team Rocket, where research was conducted for new ways to steal Pokemon, get blasted off God only knows how many times, and make Pokemon stronger, even the first tests to create a Mewtwo were secretly conducted here, until the operation was moved to Cinnabar Island after the Officer Jennys got too suspicious. But now, as Team Rocket disbanded years ago, this building was left to rot, as was laprasking’s mind, apparently, as windows shattered and broke, wallpaper ripped and scratched by wild Pokemon, weeds growing out of the holes in the floor boards, and everything covered in dust, from the vending machine with candy bars even a Snorlax or Chester A. Bum would never touch (because one is too lazy to go get anything, and the other is looking for CHAAAAAAAAANGE!!!1!), to the machines and equipment left behind by the Team Rocket scientists. Citizens moaned and petitioned for the place to be knocked down or refurbished so they would not be reminded of those dark days when Team Rocket run amack truck over with a monster truck or two, but Giovanni still owned the deeds to the building, just like his other bases and hideouts. If anything was done, he could so easily return and sue the city, leading to new funding to the evil mastermind.

Because starting a rebellion against Team Rocket isn’t the sensible thing to do…wait, what?

So it was just left there. Pokemon occasionally hung out there, but humans never dared venture there. Children were told stories of how ghost Pokemon would scare anyone that would enter, and adults just left it as it was.

One would think nobody lived there, but an sinister laughter (<- grammar fail) echoed through the hallways of the dark building, coming from a surprisingly lit room.

"NYAHEHHEHHEHHEH!" laughed the short figure in the red glasses and small white lab coat. This person was not a human, but a Clefairy! "At last, my experiment is complete!"

The pink Pokemon hoped over to her experiment table, where a lone Pokeball stood under some ray guns. She had just shot the Pokeball with the guns, and now held the balls of Steel that belonged to Duke Nukem in her tiny hands.

"NYAHEHHEH, (is this how you’re gonna start every sentence, you pansy-ass Clefairy piece of shit?) reading and observing all those text books will be worth it if my calculations are correct.." she smiled.

Clefairy was like any old Clefairy before, until she found herself in the abandoned lab. A sip of what seemed like ordinary water was actually an experimental substance that boosted her IQ by the hundreds.

It also gave her PGAS (Persistent Genital Arousal Syndrome)…hey, if the author isn’t trying, why should I?

Soon, she found herself able to speak human talk and read the dusty books and research papers that littered the lab, learning of the experiments and tests that went on. Equations and scientific theories became as familiar to her as knowing how to eat and sleep and die in a fire, and she soon realized her gift should be used for her own purpose. She knew if any humans or clones of laprasking captured her, they would use her for money and own selfish reasons. If they could do that, why couldn't she? She had the brains to do whatever she wanted, and to her, if humans could do such horrible things to fellow Pokemon in her new home, she could do the same to humans.

She opened up the Pokeball to unleash the Pokemon inside. It was a strange feeling freeing the same species as herself from the very device used to catch them. The Pokemon that came out was a Lapras.

Lapras =/= Clefairy. You fail at logic, laprasking.

The long necked Pokemon stretched out it's flippers and neck, before chanting:

"Laaaapras!...L-Lap...ras? W-w-what...is this...feeling?"

"NYAHEHHEH…Ah, you're now capable of human speech just like me now."

Dear laprasking,

Stop ripping off Meowth’s speech patterns, you fat bald bastard.

Your Worst Nightmare,
SPARTAN-S08 and the rest of the Project A.F.T.E.R. Crew

"Why? Why...have you...done this?"

"Relax, I'm on your side! I just boosted your IQ to a higher level to grant you human speech and the intelligence I require. I have also simultaneously made the readers dumber by forcing them to read this crap!"

"Intelligence?"

"Yes. See, Lapras are capable of putting Pokemon asleep with the Sing attack, right? However, with the right knowledge, that attack can be turned into something...more."

*singing* In the midnight hour, she cried "More, more, more!"

"I see, and you want to use it for your own gain."

"Let's call it an exchange shall we? I made you smart, now you must do something in return!"

Sometime later, the two were hiding in some bushes, not too far from the abandoned lab. Clefairy could only smile as her plans were becoming more real with every second going by.

"Right, so the first female trainer we spot, you use your enhanced Sing attack on them, got it?" instructed Clefairy.

"Why does it have to be a female?" asked the Lapras.

"Oh I dunno, to keep the plot interesting or something. Oh great, now I’m breaking the fourth wall for some insanely stupid reason. Don't question me on these things."

Just then, a female trainer could be seen in the distance, walking towards them.

"Okay, here we go!" smiled Celefairy, placing her earmuffs on her large sensitive ears.

Lapras opened its mouth, and began to sing it's angelic melody. The trainer stopped walking, noticing the sound.

"That sound." she said to herself. "Where's it coming from? It sounds so...bea...uti...ful."

“Why…amI…tal…kin…gli…ket…his?”

The trainer's eyes became lost in a trance as she began to look sleepy eyed. Her mind was now an open book to obeying the next person or thing with speech. Clefairy jumped out the bush, and admired the job well done.

"Ah yes, you'll be a perfect specimen for my experiment." smiled the obviously evil Clefairy. "Come with me!"

"Yes, my mistress." said the trainer, as she followed the Pokemon with her arms stretched out in front of her like she was sleepwalking, completely under her control.

Back at the lab, the trainer was stripped of all her clothes for the titillation of laprasking, and to the disgust of the readers, then placed on a metal table and had a silver helmet with wires sticking out of the topic of it. Clefairy then looked in the trainer's bag to look for her trainer card. She got it out and looked at it.

"So, you're (<- It’s YOUR, dumbass.) name is Dawn then?" asked the Clefairy.

"Yes." replied Dawn.

"Well, that will apply for now, but shortly, you will forget that name!"

Just then, Lapras slowly slide into the room.

"Well, you took your time!" said Clefairy.

"Well sorry, but being a Water Type with flippers, I can't move so well on ground unless its wet and slippery."

Could’ve used Surf to wetten the ground, you klutz.

"Well, never mind. You did a great job luring me this human!"

"So, what is it you're doing with her exactly.?"

Clefairy flicked a switch, and down came what looked like a metal chamber that lowered onto Dawn, not crushing her, but encasing her like a casket made of steel and about a hundred spikes inside. A latter-day “iron maiden”, if you will.

"Oh, I'm going to transform her! For now, she is only entranced, but shortly she will be a loyal obedient [slave] that serves for my orders and nothing else!"

So help me, if you use that word one more goddamn time, I will inflict so much rage-induced pain upon you that your crumpled body won’t even be taken by the morgue.

"How so?"

"This is no ordinary chamber. It encases the subject into a metal shell that covers her whole body, which also begins to alter. She will not require food nor drink to survive, only the odd oiling from time to time, powered by electricity, while were (<- Should be “her”.) whole mind will be reprogrammed. Soon, thoughts and memories will turn into digits of zeros and ones and orders to obey her mistress with no heart or freewill to objection. She'll become the ultimate servant and weapon."

Her only weakness? A weaponized microwave emitter used by Alcatraz.

"So you mean like a robot?"

"Exactly."

Clefairy flicked another switch, this time on a remote control she pulled out of her lab pocket. A flash of electricity filled the chamber and room, and electric sounds echoed from within. Clefairy could only smile evilly while Lapras wondered if it would work. After a short while, this stopped. One more flick of a switch lifted the chamber, producing steam from within. Emerging from the smoke was a shiny metal girl of silver, formerly the human Dawn. Her whole body now resembled a robot's, all metal from head to toe. Her eyes were bright lifeless blue orbs, while her hair was now a thin sheet of blue metal the same colour as her hair was. Her breasts were now two cone shaped *insert lewd term for breasts here* while her fingers were shape spikes. Getting down from the table, she walked towards her mistress, each footstep now echoed a loud metal thump sound.

"WHAT. IS. YOUR. COMMAND. MY. MISTRESS." asked Dawn, as her voice now sounded robotic.

“WHERE. IS. JOHN. CONNOR?”

"NYAHEHHEH, NYAHEHHEH, NYHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHHEHHEH!" laughed Clefairy, her vision was now a reality. This was only her first step towards her ultimate conquest.

However, there was a stumblingblock in her quest, that being SPARTAN-S08, who has infiltrated the facility and placed a Tactical Airstrike Beacon inside the upper floor.

"So what now?" asked Lapras.

"Now we get more girls! Once we have enough, we can take over da planet!"

"And den, dis stoopid fanfic will be ovah!"

Some time later, Clefairy and Lapras returned to the lab again, this time with two other trainers, Misty and May, both hypnotized and walking like sleepwalkers. By the snap of the Clefairy's fingers, both girls began stripping out of their clothing and laid down on the cold steel tables once completely naked.

"So where's the robot?" asked Lapras.

"Oh she's running a little thing for me." replied Clefairy.

Almost to respond to Lapras's question, Dawn flew down into the lab through the glass ceiling carrying two lifeless bodies, and safely landing with her rocket feet.

She had also broken through the glass during her half-assed landing, and now Clefairy and Lapras have to spend $50 to get it fixed.

She dropped the bodies on the ground by Clefairy's feet.

"Back from Unova I see." smiled Clefairy. "But why did you bring back the boy?"

"MY. SENSORS. INDICATED. THAT. THE. BOY. WOULD. BE. A. IDEAL. CANDIDATE. ONCE. ALTERATIONS. ARE. MADE."

“WHY. AM. I. YELLING. OUT. LOUD. FOR. NO. LOGICAL. REASON?”

"I see."

"What can you see?" asked Lapras.

Clefairy took out a needle with a pink substance and injected it into the boy's arm.

"Oh, Dawn can sense that this boy, Ash Ketchum, is destined to be a still-lifeless girl. He would have been born that way, but for whatever reason, he was born a guy and the girl inside him was locked away inside his subconscious. Just needs the right kind of "boost" to unlock it."

…what kind of shit logic is this horribly contrived plot twist coming from!?

As Clefairy talked, Ash began to change. Hair grew longer and changed to a blond colour, while his chest inflated like two small balloons attached to him. Arms and legs now thinned and his body reshaped to an hourglass figure.

"Guess now he's an Ashley, hehheh." laughed Clefairy.



"And the girl?" asked Lapras.

"Another of that boy's "companions". I believe her name is Iris."

"Ah."

"Right, you get on with your song so they're under our command as well."

As commanded, Lapras sung his song. Still with their eyes closed, Ashley and Iris smiled, as if they were having a pleasant dream, but soon awakened entranced and stood to attention.

Wait, HOW DOES A LAPRAS SINGING BRING DEAD GIRLS BACK TO LIFE!?!?

"Excellent." praised Clefairy. "Now, strip and join the other girls on the tables."
Ashley and Iris obeyed and did as instructed, removing layer upon layer of clothing including underwear until they wore nothing. Next they got up on two more steel tables and laid down, awaiting further commands. The familiar switch flick lowered four chambers down on the girls, followed by another and the four girls began to undergo the same robotification process as Dawn. Once complete, four metal girls arose from the tables, all looking similar to Dawn, only with different coloured thin metal sheets resembling their former hair.

"WHAT. ARE. YOUR. ORDERS." said the robots in unison.

SPARTAN-S08 hacked into the building’s communication system and yelled “DIE,” just before launching a precision nuclear airstrike aimed at this infernal place. I think you can figure out the rest…

The end? Nope.

Lapras looked at Clefairy, noticing a dissatisfied look on her face.

"What's wrong?" asked Lapras.

"Not fond on their colours (<- So this Pokemon is British, then?)." sighed Clefairy. "The hair's good, but the rest is just...yeah, boring silver."

And this is just…yeah, a shitty fanfic.

Clefairy walked over to a cupboard and took out a sport bag, unzipping it to reveal spray cans.

"Best we give them a paint job!" smiled Clefairy.

"Alright!"

The two Pokemon sprayed the five robots, making sure not to spary the hair, eyes or any other important parts. You’d think that a Pokemon with flippers instead of hands would be unable to use a spray can… Once finished, the two stepped back to admire their work, as each robot's body was now a different metallic colour. Ashley was orange, Iris was yellow, May was red, Misty was a light blue and Dawn was a dark blue.

"Muuuch better!" smiled Clefairy. "Pretty soon, we'll have an army of these robots. Dawn could pick up two at a time, so these five will fetch another ten girls, then those fifteen will fetch another thirty, and so on and so on, until the world is ours!"

It’s time to play “Let’s Learn Multiplication”, starring the Clefairy who is evil as fuck…

"Sounds like a plan!"

"Now my servants, go forth and bring me more girls!"

"YES. MISTRESS."

"MORE. YELLING."

The five robots activated their rocket feet and flew off, smashing through the glass ceiling and off to different locations. Once the smoke settled, Lapras noticed that Clefairy had climbed on top of his head.

"Ya know, without you I'd never get this plan off the ground, so you get equal credit for helping me." blushed Clefairy.

"Oh, well it's the least I could do for you making me able to talk and whatnot."

By surprise, Clefairy kissed the head of Lapras, and stroked him on the head, making him purr.

Pokemon: Cats in Disguise?

"I think this is going to be a beautiful relationship." smiled Clefairy.

"It sure will...my dear."

The End?

This fanfic wasn’t AS awful as the shitload of fuck (literally) that was “As Clear as Krystal”, but it’s still pretty damn awful! Now if you’ll excuse me, I have to kill someone who decided to use the word “slave” in his crappy “literature”. You wouldn’t believe me if I told you why I hate that goddamn word so fucking much…

This post has been edited by Shockwave S08: Jul 8 2011, 02:32 PM

[oneluckyduck]

You wouldn’t believe me if I told you why I hate that goddamn word so fucking much…

Someone wants to be asked why~...
And, I think the math is correct, unless I also misunderstand?

[Shockwave S08]

I was just poking fun at the fact that the author apparently thinks we're too stupid to figure those equations ourselves, is all. And as for the word "slave", I find it even more offensive than the "N" word, and I'm just a white person who hates BDSM and everything related to it. It's especially hurtful given the fact that a former friend of mine on Second Life was into that kind of stuff. Tried to turn her away from it, no success. There, I said it. Now back to hunting for laprasking for using that godforsaken word.

This post has been edited by Shockwave S08: Jul 8 2011, 05:36 PM

[oneluckyduck]

Why do you dislike BDSM?

[Shockwave S08]

Three reasons why:

1)I'm a Christian feminist (look it up on Wikipedia), so when I see a poor woman bound and gagged (something similar happened in "As Clear as Krystal", one of my mocks), chained up, and whipped, you'd bet your ass I would hunt down those responsible and make them regret it. If it were legal to do so, of course.

2)If one is a Christian, like my former friend, and she practices BDSM, what I see is a complete and total disregard for her own religion.

3)In someplace like Second Life, it can interfere with in-world relationships, which is why I explode whenever someone gets the BRIGHT IDEA to bind and gag my former friend, blocking her capability to send IM's to me, and I fucking decimate anyone in my line of sight in a blind rage, for example.

I feel nothing else needs to be said about the matter. Now let's get back on topic before this thread gets closed and we BOTH get smashed over the head with the mighty Banhammer.

[Max-Vader]

And as for the word "slave", I find it even more offensive than the "N" word, and I'm just a white person who hates BDSM and everything related to it. It's especially hurtful given the fact that a former friend of mine on Second Life was into that kind of stuff. Tried to turn her away from it, no success. There, I said it. Now back to hunting for laprasking for using that godforsaken word.

The word "slave" is not offensive in itself, since unlike the N-word it was not made to be demeaning, but to be an accurate description of reality. Slaves have existed since ancient times, and calling a subjugated person a slave is not demeaning, it is a statement of fact. The problem is that some people ARE slaves, because slavery itself is evil, not the word.
As for BDSM, it's practitioners are not slaves, because everyone who participates gives their consent and can stop whenever they desire. If someone for example whips a woman you might find it distasteful, but since she expressed a clear desire to be whipped, you have no reason to do anything about it. Well, except tell her that you consider it a bad idea, of course.
Anyway, I just wanted to point that out, because actually hurting people against their will is not BDSM, it is sadism.

[oneluckyduck]

As for BDSM, it's practitioners are not slaves, because everyone who participates gives their consent and can stop whenever they desire. If someone for example whips a woman you might find it distasteful, but since she expressed a clear desire to be whipped, you have no reason to do anything about it. Well, except tell her that you consider it a bad idea, of course.
Anyway, I just wanted to point that out, because actually hurting people against their will is not BDSM, it is sadism.

Thank you for explaining, i'm terrible at that...
except, isn't sadism just, eh, sexual enjoyment at other's pain? Isn't that what puts the S in BDSM?

[Max-Vader]

except, isn't sadism just, eh, sexual enjoyment at other's pain? Isn't that what puts the S in BDSM?

Sorta. It can also mean "submission". Even they don't know what the fuck their acronym means.

[YTB]

Ladies and gentlemen, the King of Erection Murder is back! Yes, we're going to be doing yet another Laprasking fan fic. Now is as good a time as any to do a fan fiction mockery, so let's get to it.

It's Wacky Crazy Gameshow Time!

Yes, this is the title of the fan fic. No fucking joke.

"Welcome to Wacky Crazy Gameshow Time!" happily said a male host to a camera and studio audience within a large gameshow studio set. "The show where we'll get our contestants to do the wackiest craziest things!"

Or else!

"That's right partner!" said a female host equally happy. "This show has been eight years in the making and now thanks to sponsors, funding and a big TV deal, we can finally bring you some of the wackiest, craziest television you'll ever see!"

"Shall we get our first contestant out?"

"I think we should!"

"Our first contestant is a Pokemon Coordinator all the way from the Sinnoh region and is excited to be in with a chance at our super awesome mystery prize!

Spoiler alert: The prize is a day with the President of Comoros.

Please welcome to the stage, Dawn!"

The blue haired eighteen year old girl made her way onto the stage from behind the set. Smiling, she had never had the chance to be on a gameshow before and was psyched about being on television on a wider stage.

"Welcome to the show Dawn." greeted the female host.

"Thank you, it's great to be here!" smiled Dawn.

"Why not tell us a little about yourself honey?"

"Well, I'm a coordinator as you know, I've won the Grande Festival two time in different regions, I traveled with the current Pokemon Champion of Kanto Ash Ketchum eight years ago, and this is my first time on TV on such a wide scale!"

"That's wonderful honey, and why did you apply for Wacky Crazy Gameshow?"

"I thought it sounded like fun,

In other words, she did it for the lulz.

I used to watch these type of shows with my mom before I went on a Pokemon Journey, so I figured I'd give it a go to win a grand prize!"

"Did ya here that folks? We have a gameshow fan on a gameshow!"

The audience laughed a bit.

There's probably a huge light-up sign over the set that says "LAUGH OR DIE".

"Are you ready for the first round Dawn?" asked the male host.

"You bet!"

"Great! Let's begin with our first round, the Hyp Round!"

In case the fact that this was a laprasking fan fic didn't already tell you that this wasn't going to turn out well, there's this.

Just then, a wooden chair rose up behind Dawn.

"Please sit in the chair door." said the female host.

Dawn did as instructed.

"In this round, Dawn will be attempted into hypnosis, which she must try and resist, or she'll lose valuable points that'll cost her at the end of the show!" explained the male host.

"Hypnosis? That's a bit weird for a gameshow." Dawn questioned.

No shit, Sherlock.

"Don't worry hon." whispered the female host in Dawn's ear. "Just play along."

"Okay Dawn, you are not allowed to close your eyes and you must always look at the shiny coin!" explained the male host.

But what if she has to blink?

"Well, okay."

The main host hung a coin on a chain from his finger, making it swing left and right in front of Dawn.

"Now, watch the coin. Keep your eyes on the coin, notice how it shines and moves."

Dawn watched the coin, moving her eyes left and right in rhythm as the coin shined in her eyes, causing dizziness within her mind.

"I feel..." said Dawn softly in a daze.

"You are in the coin's power. You will be open to any suggestion given to you and have a desire to obey, no matter how ridiculous the idea sounds, and you have to perform as sexily as you can.

By the time the moral crusaders are done with this show, it's just going to be a half an hour of static.

We are your Masters and the audience is your canvas, you long to entertain them and they long for you! Do you understand?"

"...I-I...I obey."

Dawn was now completely locked in a trance, eyes now empty and soulless. Her mind now only held thoughts of doing as she was told and obeying anything. Any worry or concern she had before was out the window as well as any other thought.

"Great folks, she is now hypnotized!" smiled the Male Host. "Now the fun can really begin!"

A loud cheer from the audience filled the room as they clapped and wooed at the news.

"Please stay up." ordered the Female Host, and Dawn did as she was told. "Stay on one leg."

Dawn lifted a leg into the air.

"What a good sport, she's completely under our power!"

As the chair descended, a screen now rose up to the stage. The Female Host handed Dawn a box.

"Please put this on behind the screen. And do it as soon and as sexy as possible."

"Yes Mistress."

As Dawn hid behind the screen, her silhouette was visible thank to a studio light behind. While erotic music played, she slowly took off her hat and hair clips, placing the hand on the top left corner.

How terribly sexy.

Next, she slid both straps of her top, wiggling in a sexual manner as she pulled it off her head. Skirt came next, bending down with her ass in the air as she pulled the skirt and panties down, causing whistles and cheers from the audience. The unhooking of her bra got the biggest pop, as she played with her hair, tossing it about and stroking it with her fingers. Finally, she sat down to take off her boots and socks while her smooth thin legs were high in the air. Opening the box once stood up again, she pulled out what looked like a one piece swimsuit, though the audience could not tell from the silhouette. Legs went in before she pulled it up her body, cupping her breasts to ensure her breasts were concealed.

"Woah, how about that folks? Okay Dawn, let's see the sexy outfit you're in!"

"Yes Master."

The screen lowered to reveal Dawn wearing only a tight dark blue leotard.

"My my, it's a leotard!" the female host pointed out. "And you know what that means?"

Gymnastics?

"HAIGURE TIME!" Shouted the audience.

"Okay Dawn, in this round, you'll be doing the embarrassing Haigure dance for five minutes straight!" the male host explained. "Do well, and you'll be rewarded with points!"

"Yes Master.

As some corny sounding J-Pop music began to play, Dawn widened her legs in a sort of crab position and started moving her arms up and down from her chest to her hips.

"HAIGURE, HAIGURE, EVERYONE DO THE HAIGURE!" Dawn happily sung to the music, unaware of the humiliating action she was performing in front of a live audience. "HAIGURE, HAIGURE, EVERYONE DO THE HAIGURE!"

"Look at that folks, what a silly dance she's doing!"

Hahahaha, she's making a fool of herself against her will! How funny!

The audience cheered and applauded, not caring how silly the dance was. They were clearly enjoying it very much through the whole five minutes.

"Okay Dawn, now halt." ordered the female host after the five minutes, and Dawn froze, not moving from the position she was in. "Very good Dawn! You've entertained the crowd, AND you frozen your position, very well done!"

"That'll earn her some extra points!" smiled the main host. "Now please change back into your underwear Dawn!"

I'm starting to question just how legal this is.

As the screen returned back up, Dawn stepped behind it, changing out of the leotard and back into her bra and panties as instructed. Ready, she returned to the full view of the audience.

"Our next few rounds involve some creativity. Over here are some props that Dawn must use to her advantage to "please" the audience the viewers the best she can! Are you ready Dawn?"

"Yes Master."

As the rounds came and went, Dawn performed all sorts of activities that would seem normal and in no way embarrassing if Dawn was not in her underwear and have a large crowd watching while hypnotized. To start, she used a skipping rope to jump up and down as she swan the rope, her chest bouncing as she was doing so. Stretching came next, performing all manner of poses as she starched her arms and legs in many ways, then trampoline, which involved jumping up and performing all kinds of aerial tricks. The list when on, from cooking in only an apron, to balancing a spoon on her nose, to acting like a dog, and so on, until the final round, the lingerie round, involved an attractive red little number in the underwear department.

Laprasking seems to have a knack for making an otherwise kinky situation boring as fuck.

"Congratulations Dawn!" said the Male Host." After two hours of nonstop rounds and activities, as well as an amazing final round, you win the grand prize!"

"That's right, please take this red pill!" the female host handed Dawn a red pill.

"Yes Mistress."

Dawn put the pill in her mouth and swallowed instantly. A few seconds later, her bra popped off her chest as it expanded from a C cup to DD cup, jiggling from the freed sensation.

"Our contestant has won a breast expansion for being such a great sport!" smiled the male host as cheered filled the building.

That'll certainly be useful for her day with the President of Comoros.

"Congrats to our winner!"

"Why do you take a shower?" asked the Female Host. "You must be hot and sweaty from all those activities."

"Yes Mistress."

As Dawn disappeared to the back, the sound of a shower could be heard.

"That's about all we have time for this episode folks." said the Male Host.

The audience awwed.

"Think we have time for one more treat don't you think?"

"I think we could squeeze it in. Let's lift up the back drop!"

The back of the set rose up, revealing a small shower cubical with a wet Dawn inside as she was showering herself off, scrubbing every part of her body as her chest was pressed against the glass due to the tiny space she had. She smiled once she saw the audience again, who gave her the biggest pop yet.

"We've saved the best till last!" smiled the Male Host. "When I click my fingers, something special will occur.

If it's not the fan fic ending, then it can't be that great.

Ready? Here we go!"

After the male host click his fingers, Dawn blinked her eyes as they were restored of life and expression on her face.

"What the- where am I?" pondered looked at the audience watching and cheering at her, before gasping at her wet naked self.

"OH MY GOD!" She screamed in horror. "WHY AM I NAKED? AND WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO MY BREASTS?"

As the audience laughed at her humiliation, she covered herself up best she could with her arms.

"DON'T LOOK AT ME! THIS IS EMBARRASSING!"

Much time after the credits rolled, the hosts made their way to the production room where their producer was waiting for them. Entering the room, their small producer turned around in his wheelie chair to greet them.

"So, how did the filming go Meowth?" asked the female host.

"Just Purrrrrfect Jessie!" grimed the cat Pokemon wearing a producer's hat.



"We got great shots of all the action and da boss loved the live feed from his office! It was so purrfect a pilot episode, we begin filming a full series right away!"

"That's brilliant!" smiled the Male Host. "I can really see myself doing this long term!"

"It's a good thing we lined up a whole bunch of girls in the green room for such an occasion!" Meowth high fived James. "So how did you do with da twerpet?"

"Oh we got her to the back and hypnotized her again to forget she was ever on the show." Jessie answered. "We then programmed her so she acts more like a bimbo, and after a few days, she'll have a strong desire to join Team Rocket!"

"And that's when she'll be fully brainwashed into a loyal Team Rocket member!" James laughed.

"Excellent! Now let's begin filming episode two." ordered Meowth. "Those Rockets in the audience are demanding more!"

Shortly after, Jessie and James returned to the stage, ready to film their next episode. The camera crew and audience returned from lunch and positioned themselves to start shooting as the title music played.

I hope by shooting, they mean that people are going to die.

"Our next contestant is a local girl!" Jessie spoke to the audience. "She's one of the Gym Leaders of Kanto and a Water Type Trainer, please give it up for Misty!"

The redhead walked towards the hosts smiling and waving to the audience and unaware of the worst hour of her life about to be seen on worldwide television.

Needless to say, Wacky Crazy Gameshow Time was a major hit in the ratings for all the regions in the Pokemon World...

Because everyone in the Pokemon World is a depraved sadist.

The End

There, that's it, we're done. You're free to leave now if you haven't done so already.

[Shockwave S08]

SPARTAN-S08 reporting in once again. Apparently the powers that be somehow can’t keep Laprasking away from a keyboard of any kind, even if they were to cut off all of his limbs. Case in point, this fic called “Bride of Mewtwo”, in which Mewtwo (duh) *SPOILER ALERT* unsurprisingly turns Ash Ketchum into a girl-haven’t seen THAT before-right before he gives (him?)her the ‘ol “in-out-in-out”. So without further delay, let’s get to demolition!

Bride of Mewtwo

A lonely Pokemon sighed in depression within an abandoned warehouse.

Sounds like someone forgot to take his happy pills. Ah well, all the more for the readers to use after reading this.

The Pokemon in question was truly a one of a kind, and being one of a kind meant there were no other Pokemon of his kind (NO, WHAT GAVE YOU THAT IDEA!?), not that this was his fault, being created by humans. There was Mew, the Pokemon he was created from, but Mew was not exactly the same as him. He just wanted an equal, a soul mate to be together with and end this loneliness he was forever cursed to have, someone to express new and unique feelings towards, much like what a man and a woman, or a male and female Pokemon couple share.

He would do so by forcing her into the kitchen and having her make him a sandwich.

The lonely Pokemon in question was Mewtwo, the one said to be the most powerful and emo Pokemon alive.

Times were tough on the genetic Pokemon after his cloned friends left him to explore the world. They were probably sick of his bitching and whining about how “THE WORLD WILL NEVER ACCEPT HIM!” The time alone had really hit the Pokemon hard, and he began to think the most evilest of thoughts to find the one meant for him.

And here I thought he turned into a good-guy after “Mewtwo Strikes Back”…

He hires a bunch of Ledyba to find a human to kidnap and bring back to him. He would then make that person love him for what he was, by any means necessary, even if he had to resort to using GameShark to cheat his way to success.

The Ledyba shortly returned carrying a large worming sack of their backs. The hired Pokemon placed the bag in front of Mewtwo.

"Excellent." smiled Mewtwo. "Now take your worthless reward and go!"

"Ledyba!" replied the happy Pokemon, and they flew over to the sack full of different poisoned berries and flew away with it out the window, leave Mewtwo alone again, only with company this time.

"Now, let's see just what kind of person they brought to me."

Mewtwo used his psychic power to untie the bag, to which a young male trainer rolled out of the bad-smelling bag, coughing from the lack of air he endured.

"*cough* Mewtwo?" said the puzzled boy.

HOW DOES ASH RECOGNIZE HIM IF MEWTWO WIPED HIS MEMORY AT THE END OF “THE FIRST MOVIE”!?

"That boy!" the Pokemon thought to himself. "He stopped me from conquering the world


OF COURSE!

and saved me from Giovanni!"

The Pokemon placed his hand against his forehead in disbelief.

I am doing the exact same thing right now, but for entirely different reasons.

"Those foolish Ledyba! When I said partner I meant a female! And of all the male trainers they had to pick, they pick "this" one!"

Maybe the Ledyba thought you were a flaming homosexual.

"Is something wrong Mewtwo?" asked Ash. "Why have you brought me here?"

Mewtwo glazed upon the confused trainer. Even though the boy had saved him twice before, the scientific part of his mind thought up an interesting idea. Rather then go through another mishap with the Ledyba, he could do with what he had, only some adjustments could be made. Better to be with someone he knew then a complete stranger.

"Look into my eyes." Mewtwo commanded Ash as his eyes began to glow a dark blue color.

SPARTAN-S08’s Power Tip of the Day: Never listen to Mewtwo if you’re in a Laprasking fic. EVER.

To Ash, they seemed hypnotic and mesmerizing, making his mind feel all blank and his own eyes go all cold, lifeless and into a trance.

"You are now under my control and have no free will." commanded Mewtwo. "You will obey everything I tell you. You understand?"

SPARTAN-S08’s Rage is now at 90%. Don’t push it, you goddamn fucking moron.

"Yes...I am under your power." "Ash obeyed, speaking softly as he sat on his knees.

"Good, now let's make you fit to be my partner."

Mewtwo moved his right arm forward towards Ash's chest. The thin white arm glowed purple with Psychic energy. As Mewtwo pulled his arm back, two orbs grew on Ash's chest, the size of grape fruits. Next, the Pokemon closed his three fingers, causing Ash's body to thin. The trainer now had thin arms and legs and a slim waist that made him look almost attractive.

So you’re saying that he/she is butt-ugly now? That’s…not surprising.

Widening his fingers, Mewtwo expanded Ash's hips and butt, giving him the perfect hourglass figure before closing his fingers to cause Ash to moan gently and femininely as his manhood was altering into a pair of lips.


Oh now look what you did, Laprasking. Now he’s gonna crack down on your abuse of the laws of physics and matter.

"Hmm, something missing." the powerful Pokemon pondered. "I know."

The Pokemon trusted his psychic arm forward, Falcon Punching Ash so hard that the whole universe is destroyed by the resulting awesomeness. Dr. Hax is the only survivor.

END

causing Ash's hair to grow so long it reached his ass and the black color fade away into a bright yellow blond color. The former Ash was no more recognizable.

"You no longer go by the name of Ash Ketchum." ordered Mewtwo. "You will forget all memories you once had and assume the new better life as a girl and my mate, Ashley."

"I will no longer be Ash Ketchum." said the former boy turned girl. "I am nothing more then your name, I am Ashley."

Rage is at 99%. You push me ONE MORE FUCKING TIME AND I’LL-

"Good. Now undress out of those boy clothes and let me see that body of yours!"

What.

Doing as instructed, Ashley stood up and began to undress, starting with her blue coat, then her black shirt, dropping out her large DDDDDDDDDDD breasts into full view...that’s just revolting. Slipping out of her shoes then pulling off her socks, Ashley unbuckled her belt, letting her loose jeans and boxers dropped to the ground. She stepped out of her former boy clothes and stood to attention to her Master, so he could get a good look at her naked body.

Rage is at 110%. You have one, and I mean ONE. PARAGRAPH. TO TURN THINGS AROUND BEFORE I TRANSFORM ALL OF YOUR SICK, TWISTED REALITY INTO APOCALYPTICA.

"Perfect." smiled Mewtwo as he looked down at his groin. A large body part started to erect out of his body, stiffening to full length.

I..what..I don’t even…why-



"Come Ashley." commanded the horny Pokemon. "Get down on your knees and pleasure my cock now!"

The girl waked over quickly to Mewtwo and got down below to add to his member. She began by grabbed the nine inch cock with her hand and licked it with her tongue upward like an ice lolly from bottom to tip. Mewtwo moaned in pleasure, as he had never experienced this sensation before.


Everybody take one of these.

"YES!" He moaned. "LIKE, THAT! ...LICK THE TIP MORE!"

Ashley began to lick the tip as if it were the sweetest lollipop she had ever tasted, then proceeded to suck it, then put the whole thing in her mouth before thrusting her head back and forth, trying to get as much of it in her mouth as possible.

Apparently this fanfic does NOT want to be mocked, and is most DEFINITELY self-aware.

"Oh god YESSSSSS!" cried Mewtwo. "SOMETHINNNNNG'S C-C-COMING!"

As Mewtwo experienced his first ejaculation, Ashley's cheeks inflated as cum pumped into her mouth, down her throat and dripped down her chin. She made sure to lick her lips and swallow as much of her master's seed as she could, loving the taste of her master's cock.

SPARTAN-S08 is currently too busy throwing up in a bucket to make any witty comments, if there are any to be had from this sick filth.

"That was amazing!" puffed Mewtwo. " I cannot wait any longer, I must become one with you! Assume the doggy position right down."

Ashley turned around and got on all fours, wiggling her behind to further attract her master's cock to her pussy, which already socked in her own juices in experiment of what was to "cum".
"Now, as I do you, I want you to describe every moment." ordered the horny Pokemon."

"Yes Master...my pussy is wet with excitement for your amazing cock to enter it!"

Once the tip pressed against Ashley's opening, Mewtwo pushed forward so the whole thing slide inside of Ashley, making her breath out the pleasure her whole body just felt.

"AAAHHHH! MASTER! YOUR HOT HARD COCK IS INSIDE ME! ITS MAKING ME FEEL SO HOT!"

"Gooooood girl...I shall reward you."

SPARTAN-S08 grabs another bucket to throw up in.

Good to his word, Mewtwo began to fuck Ashley, moving himself back and forth to make his cock go in and out of the hot pussy.

"YESSSSS, AHHHH, I CAME FEEL YOUR COCK THOUGHOUT MY, AHHHH, WHOLE BODY! ITS RUBBING AGAINST MY INNER WALLS, AHHHHHHHH, THIS FEELS JUST SOOOOOOOOO AMAZING! AHHHH AHHHH AHHHHHHH! PLEASE GO FASTER MASTER, FASSSSSSSSSTER!"

As if the roles were reversed, Mewtwo did as Ashley asked, or rather begged for, increasing his speed. Every so often, he went faster and faster, until he reached speeds that were not possible by a human, not that it bothered Ashley who was lost in pleasure and orgasms.

"AAAHHHH AAAAAHHHH AHHHH AAAAAHHHH AAAAAHHHHH AAAAAAAHHHHH YES YES YES YES YESSSSSSSSS!" Cried Ashley. "MY PUSSSY, AHHHHHH, ON FIRE, AAAAHHHHHH, PLEASE CUM, AHHHH, INSIDE MEEEEEEEEEEEE!"

I have no idea why we’re SHOUTING AT RANDOM!!!

Mewtwo felt a huge cumming was due inside him. Ashley's pleas for cum were the spark that brought his cock to the point of cumming. Holding tight to Ashley's butt, Mewtwo cum like a fire hose inside of Ashley, literally. So much so, it fill her pussy and even began to fill Ashley's new womb, belly now inflating while Ashley's face froze in sex face, mouth drooling as much spit as the juices dripping out of her pussy. By the time Mewtwo stopped, Ashley looked nine months pregnant, only full of cum instead of a baby. Ashley fell on her front, cock now slipping out of the nailed pussy which now had cum burst out like a leaking pipes, along with her own mixed juices. Her stomach returned to normal while Ashley laid in a pool of cum, drool and sweat, panting like crazy as she was exhausted from her Master screwing her.

*2,000 buckets and 20 hours of projectile-vomiting later* Thank God that’s over.

" * pant * I...love you...Master..."

"Likewise... * pant * my mate..."

Sometime later, a wedding was arrange inside the warehouse, invitation to local Pokemon only. The invited Pokemon gathered into a crowd around a large pink stage where Mewtwo and a certain gendered changed person stood. While Mewtwo wore a red bowtie, Ashley wore a white wedding dress, one with a short enough skirt that showed off her exposed ass that was missing panties and bigger this time. What also had increased in size over time was her breasts now two to three cup sizes bigger then before, which given their previous size, is probably about the size of a mansion by this point. Ashley couldnt be happier.

"When will you and all these Pokemon start to fuck me?" asked an excited Ashley.

Slut.

"Shortly my love, once the ceremony concludes."

The Pokemon held his soon to be wife's hand, which now looked like his, undergoing a mutation.


FUCKING GENETICS, HOW DO THEY WORK!?

"Pretty soon my love, you will be just like me, a Pokemon that's one of its kind, and one made just for me."

"I can't wait Master. I love you soon much!"

As soon as Mewtwo placed the ring on her finger, Ashley looked at the crowd with pleasure, as all the horny Pokemon rushed towards her on the stage. The girl felt like heaven…er…I mean…the legions of Hell had taken her in.

The End

I think I’m gonna be sick again. *goes back to projectile vomiting*