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> CCC #159 - 1/17/15
CCC #159 Finalists Poll
Pick one of the following captions to reveal your exclusive Clash of Clans prize code:
"Joints screaming in protest, Thomas hunched down into a ninja pose for the camera, praying to the shonen gods that he would not shart until those girl cosplayers walked away. His prayer would go unanswered." - Deceiver [ 4 ] ** [25.00%]
"No, Jim, the term is CLOSET cosplay, not JANITOR'S CLOSET cosplay!" - oneluckyduck [ 4 ] ** [25.00%]
"'Those twenty years worth of semen are now gathering inside me, waiting to be released.'" - Beatdoof [ 1 ] ** [6.25%]
"Go ninja, go ninja, go home!" - StabbyKobold [ 3 ] ** [18.75%]
"Having consumed the contents of their host's skull, the larvae of the Swiffer Duster emerge to spin their cocoons." - Jeeves [ 2 ] ** [12.50%]
"The ninja duplication went awry and now all twenty images just piled upon our hero until swollen and fit to burst." - DeanTheAdequate [ 2 ] ** [12.50%]
Total Votes: 16
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Post #1
Master of AFTER


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post Jan 17 2015, 07:14 AM
So. You think you've got what it takes to win the Cosplay Caption Contest? Heh, that's what they all say. Talk is cheap. Better idea: Throw down in a caption cage match and prove you're the real deal. You'll either walk away with some serious bragging rights or get wiped the fuck out. Either way, it should be a fun time. Break a leg.


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This contest's winning caption is...

Joints screaming in protest, Thomas hunched down into a ninja pose for the camera, praying to the shonen gods that he would not shart until those girl cosplayers walked away. His prayer would go unanswered.

Congratulations, Deceiver!


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Post #2
SeinenNinja


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post Jan 17 2015, 08:26 AM
Here is the typical Naruto Cosplayer after getting a swirlie from the other congoers...

Costume expense: $10, Con pass: $15, Picture: $5, Losing all sense of shame: Priceless

This post has been edited by SeinenNinja: Jan 17 2015, 08:28 AM
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Post #3
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post Jan 17 2015, 09:26 AM
Lil' Wayne's lil' cousin: Lil' Weeaboo.


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Post #4
Deceiver


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post Jan 17 2015, 09:47 AM
I didn't know Snorlax was a Naruto fan.

Joints screaming in protest, Thomas hunched down into a ninja pose for the camera, praying to the shonen gods that he would not shart until those girl cosplayers walked away. His prayer would go unanswered.

Smearing your head in marshmallow fluff and dunking it into a trash can does not a costume make.
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Post #5
DoubleDash


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post Jan 17 2015, 09:47 AM
After Naruto's adventures ended, Kakashi really let himself go, replacing his hair with the finest of ninja hair tech.

"In the name of the Ninja Clan!"

This post has been edited by DoubleDash: Jan 17 2015, 03:48 PM


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Post #6
oneluckyduck


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post Jan 17 2015, 04:18 PM
Oh god, the hobos are catching on! No one will notice them at the conventions now...

No, Jim, the term is CLOSET cosplay, not JANITOR'S CLOSET cosplay!


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post Jan 17 2015, 05:30 PM
A wise man once said: "To achieve a clear mind it must be wiped clean, so wipe with what's appropriate and remember to flush."

You now see before you the terrifying secret technique known only as Teriyaki Fat Jutsu: 100 Heart Attacks.

Bring both your hobby and your fetish to the convention with the new Body Inflation Technique.


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Post #8
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post Jan 17 2015, 07:06 PM
This is what happens if Kakashi is concentrating too much into porn and less into defeating some snake fucker.

"Those twenty years worth of semen are now gathering inside me, waiting to be released."

"Hey, I like KFC as much as the next guy, but really? You have to eat chicken while simultaneously reading porn? That's like, dangerous to your physical and mental health, bro."

This post has been edited by Beatdoof: Jan 17 2015, 07:48 PM


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Post #9
StabbyKobold


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post Jan 17 2015, 07:22 PM
The teachings of Master Yu Phat was strong with him. Finally, he would take his revenge on the hand-me-down jeans of his evil brother.

Before the shoot, Bill was told to remove his wallet from his pocket. The next day, the tumor was confirmed.

Go ninja, go ninja, go home!


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Post #10
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post Jan 18 2015, 06:34 AM
"Silent Mist of Sure Olfatory Annihilation Jutsu!"
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post Jan 19 2015, 01:35 PM
Having consumed the contents of their host's skull, the larvae of the Swiffer Duster emerge to spin their cocoons.
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Post #12
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post Jan 20 2015, 08:02 PM
I highly doubt a man who hasn't seen the sun months at a time can get a grass stain on their jeans that big.

The ninja duplication went awry and now all twenty images just piled upon our hero until swollen and fit to burst.

Big Dave didn't shower at con again. He's next to the tarp so we'd better get the fire hose.

This post has been edited by DeanTheAdequate: Jan 23 2015, 05:08 PM


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The forgotten member of the "Tribe of Spoon"

Winner of CCC #107- I've decided to let it all go to my head, then my pancreas, then a short trip to the gonads for release.
Winner of CCC #129- Took me a while to push this rock back up the hill and... whoops.
Winner of CCC #136- Whoo-Hoo! Whiskey and hookers on me! Seriously, drape them upon my slumbering mass.
Winner of CCC #137- Two in a row! Do you believe in Miracles?! No seriously, the hell was up with that Jackie Chan flick?
Winner of CCC #143- I'm so drunk on power now! I've sold all my tanker trucks full of Baily's Irish Creme to balance things out.
Winner of CCC #147- Comrades! Rejoice in the conquering of the bourgeois pigs with this caption of dressing down weeaboos!
Winner of CCC #164- Yes another one in the win colu... Who am I kidding? Dr. O deserves this one.
Winner of CCC#165- Victory is mine! Dudes, line up on my right for high fives. Ladies, line up on the left for make-outs.
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post Jan 23 2015, 02:26 PM
He has mop hair so he can master his ultimate ninja technique: Big Mac Summon lvl. 1.


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post Jan 24 2015, 05:28 PM
Did the budgeting for the Naruto spinoff went down so much, that they had to go for the urban approach?

The role of Kakashi will now be portrayed by Don King.

I betcha he's auditioning for the latest Rocky. They're trying to gain a new audience with the inclusion of Blackashi.


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Post #15
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post Jan 26 2015, 06:06 AM
Killer job on those captions, everybody. Current mood: Impressed!

There was such a fine lineup of entries this time that the job of selecting the finalists took its toll on my psyche. I tried to acknowledge a variety of different approaches instead of zeroing in just on the fat jokes, great as they were. While only six entries can proceed to the final round, there were many more that deserve a round of applause. Even though no one else will see it, go ahead and give yourselves a hand. Go on! Are you clapping? You'd better be. Clap, damn it!


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Post #16
DeanTheAdequate


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post Jan 26 2015, 09:51 AM
I thought of another one, but held back because I could....

"PENDULOUS MAN BREAST NO JUTSU!"


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The forgotten member of the "Tribe of Spoon"

Winner of CCC #107- I've decided to let it all go to my head, then my pancreas, then a short trip to the gonads for release.
Winner of CCC #129- Took me a while to push this rock back up the hill and... whoops.
Winner of CCC #136- Whoo-Hoo! Whiskey and hookers on me! Seriously, drape them upon my slumbering mass.
Winner of CCC #137- Two in a row! Do you believe in Miracles?! No seriously, the hell was up with that Jackie Chan flick?
Winner of CCC #143- I'm so drunk on power now! I've sold all my tanker trucks full of Baily's Irish Creme to balance things out.
Winner of CCC #147- Comrades! Rejoice in the conquering of the bourgeois pigs with this caption of dressing down weeaboos!
Winner of CCC #164- Yes another one in the win colu... Who am I kidding? Dr. O deserves this one.
Winner of CCC#165- Victory is mine! Dudes, line up on my right for high fives. Ladies, line up on the left for make-outs.
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Post #17
Master of AFTER


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post Jan 30 2015, 04:52 AM
Approximately 24 hours remain before we call this one, folks. If you haven't already voted, then you'd better get on it!


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Post #18
Master of AFTER


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post Jan 31 2015, 06:55 AM
Good job on those votes, everybody. Niiiiiice work. It was a close race this time, but Deceiver pulled ahead late in the game to eke out a victory. How deceptive! Nevertheless, a 'W' is a 'W'. Well played, D.

Many thanks to those of you who found it in your hearts to share all those hilarious captions with the rest of us. And don't think I don't appreciate the contribution of those who voted in the poll, because I surely don't don't!


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